cheeeatin'

Cheating...

Hmmmm...

Where do I start?

I'm sure that almost everyone reading this have either cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse, right? If not, it's safe to say that you KNOW somebody who has cheated.

I did. Wayyyyyyy back in the day in college with an old girlfriend. I told y'all that. It happened and I learned from it. Didn't get caught, tho (haaaaa)

As I've gotten older, I learned that shit happens. What I mean by that...i don't get mad when i hear about how "so and so cheated with so and so."

Cheating means different things to men and women. I can't tell you why women cheat. Can't really tell you why men cheat. And I can't speak from experience. However, I will give you some distinct perspectives.

SOME women cheat because they feel neglected. As a man, the last thing that you wanna do is to neglect your woman. If a women feels like she's giving 100% and she's being taken for granted...she may stray.

SOME men cheat because they can't help themselves. LMAO! Just kiddin. Seriously, I won't say that it's in our DNA. However, men are selfish by nature. We have been chasing women since the age of 12. We've always been told to "get as much azz as we can." We took those words to heart. LOL. Some of us are just downright greedy. For a man, I think you must have an appetite to cheat. It's just like eating. It's habit forming. Just like you have the urge to eat. If you cheat, it becomes a part of your ritual.

Honestly, I really don't know if ANY of us can say that we'd never cheat. I'm married...never cheated. I think that fair to say that I could never say never. There's an old saying..."A man is as faithful as his options." If that were true, I'd have a ton of chicks...but not as many as somebody like Kobe Bryant. I think cheating is more about situations. If you keep yourself out of certain situations, you won't cheat.

Here's the scenario...a woman will not cheat even after the man has her alone at his house. She could easily walk away.

Now...if you put a man in the same situation...you'll get a different result. If you put a nekkid woman in front of a man that he's attracted to...he's gonna splack (lmao)...i mean have sex. The only nekkid woman that should be in front of a man to keep him faithful should be a shoe model (aka stripper) haaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Cheating...your thoughts

Hollatchaboi!

giveit2mebaby

Disclaimer...
The thoughts expressed in the post are the strictly by the author of this post. They contain graphic and sexually explicit content. If you're reading this at work, you may wanna stop right here b/c I don't wanna get you fired. LOL. If you're easily offended or extremely "hot and bothered" (as the old people say)...stop right here. If not...proceed!


Today, I'm gonna talk about something that we ALL can relate to...sex.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that if you're reading this post, you've had sex at least once in your lifetime. You may have called it sex. You may have called it what others call it...

sex, fuckin, bonin, screwing, humping, hunching, shagging, getting your back blown out, hitting, punchin', getting broke off, chopped and screwed, making love, getting tapped, knockin' boots, bangin', getting some trim, nut bustin, or splacking (my personal favorite term from back in the day).

Whatever you wanna call it...we all do it. And MOST of us enjoy it. We are the most sexual creatures on the earth. Why do we love sex? Well, that would depend on who you ask. Let's take a deeper look at sex.

1. Men view sex different from the way that women view sex:
Duhhhhh. That's like saying that "an elephant is heavy." In general, men think about sex probably more than they think about anything else. It's natural. The reason why I say it's natural because we've been thinking about sex since we were like 13 yrs old. We gotta have it. LOL. Seriously, we just don't view it the same way that women do. When a man meets a woman, his thoughts will ultimately lead to how soon he can get her nekkid so that he can knock the boots. A woman may meet a man and be thinking about how nice he is...how cute he is...how smart he is...yadda yadda yadda. For men, we'll put a instant clock in our head as to "how long it MITE take before we can hit it." Ladies, if you don't believe me...ask your man about what he thought about you before y'all became a couple. LMAO!!!

2. Women know within the first 7-10 mins whether or not they will sleep with a man:
MOST women...not all women...but most of em know if and when it's gonna go down. Sometimes, it depends on what the man says or doesn't say. I've had female friends tell me about how they were gonna bone the dude but he said something stupid and ruined it for her.

3. Men and women view sex on the first night different:
Some women think that men think that they are a slut if they splack on the 1st night. Wrong. I mean...doesn't it take 2 people to have sex? If she's a slut for having sex on the 1st night...then what is he? A stud? That's bullshit. Men don't care about that. What men DO care about is whether on not she has sex on the first night with him, Joe, Kevin, Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky, and Mike.

4. Orgasms count:
As a man, you had BETTA make sure that she has an orgasm! You hear more and more women complaining about NOT having one. That's up to the fellas. We gotta get them there. Or you might not get a returned phone call. However, it's just as important for the woman to make sure that the man "bust a nut". If he doesn't, I can promise you that he won't call you back.

5. Orgasms = love or Orgasms = lust
Ever notice how SOME women fall in love after sex? He blew your back out and now you want to be his girl? Why? Did you want to be his girl before y'all had sex? Was that even discussed? Just because he made your eyes roll in the back of your head and had you shivering like a 3 yr old standing outside on a 30 degree day doesn't mean that you love him. You lust him. Or maybe you love how he twisted you? But don't get it confused, you don't love him.

On the contrary, I've seen dudes just get pussy whipped after sex. I mean, I've seen dudes just disappear after gettin' some good trim. LOL. But it ain't love. Orgasms are great but they don't lead to love. Quiet frankly, some of us have been with people who could ONLY give us a good orgasm and not a good 5 minute stimulating conversation.

6. Let's be fuck buddies:
Bad move. If you ever decide to JUST have sex with a person and become their fuck buddy, you're wasting your time. That doesn't work. "We can have sex but have no emotional ties to each other." Bullshit. What you're saying is..."I wanna hump you and everybody else but I don't wanna stop humping you just yet." People forget that sex is an emotional act. It's almost impossible to have sex with somebody and not feel SOMETHING for them. You may not be in love with them but you care. The only people who can have non emotional sex are porn stars and prostitutes...and I don't think y'all fall into that category.

7. Explore your inner freak
We're all freaks. I'ma freak. You're a freak. He's a freak. And she's a freak. Don't be afraid to try new stuff. You never know...you just might like it.

8. Sex sells
Sex sells and sex pays. Remember that. If you do things, you'll be rewarded. Fellas, take out the trash and clean the garage and watch to see what happens. LMAO!!!

9. Be open
Men and women must always be open to their partners needs and desires. Communication is the key.

10. When in doubt...when you're pissed off...fuck
Ladies, always take advantage of morning wood! LMAO!!!


I'ma stop right here. At this point, I don't know what the hell y'all gonna say about this.

iwannbewithu

I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.

JFresh: "You're ready to do this?"

Me: "Yeah man. I know I'm ready"

JFresh: "You're gonna have to sign that contract. You know...that's what a marriage certificate is. It's a contract. It ain't like the contract that you signed for you job. You can't get outta this contract. How much does a marriage license cost?"

Me: "Ten bucks."

JFresh: "It'll cost you a lot more to get out of that contract."


I remember that conversation. It was nearly 9 yrs ago. Just before I got married.

J is a smart dude. Single. No kids. I've known him since we were 6. He was in my wedding. I'll be in his...if it ever happens. Probably won't ever happen. He's not looking to get married. He's not looking for a commitment from a woman.

Commitment- the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself...the state or act of committing

Many people say that it's hard for men AND women to commit. Why? Not really sure. These are some possibilities...

1. Loosing out
If you commit to a relationship or a marriage, you lose out on all of the men or women that you COULD be with. For instance, by getting married...I've given up on ALL of the women all over the world who want me!! Because all of the women want me...right? LMAO! You get my point

2. Fear of the unknown
Men (in general) run from this fear. They've heard horror stories about how a woman changes after she becomes your main girl or wife. That fear almost cripples someones mental state. I've heard stories about dudes who had sex all the time before they got married. Once the ring was put on her finger, the sex slowed down. I've also heard stories from women who have had men who went from being driven and hard working to lazy bums

3. Lost friends
Some people think that when you are in a comitted relationship you're supposed to rid yourself of your friends. Not true. Should you put your friends before your lover? No. Should you put the person who you're comitted to before your friends? Depends on who you ask


I could go on and on but you get my point. I think almost all of us want to commit to someone. And we want that person to be just as committed to us in return. One of the great benefits of being committed is that you get to share some great times and bad times with one person. And that makes the bond stronger.

What about you? Your thoughts on your commitment or desires to have one.

Hollatchaboi.

off tha dome

random thoughts...

They say it's better to have lost love than to have never loved at all.

Bullshit...love hurts! LoL

Can we get tha gas prices back down to $1.50?

I have like 600 channels on Directv but I only watch 10 of em.

A relationship is about being committed to the committment

We miss you Mike. I'ma moonwalk tonight JUST for you.

Life can be easy at times...but WE make it complicated.

Memo to Prez O...work on that pitching, bruh. That pitch that you threw the other night at the All Star Game was WEAK.

Don't you just hate those folk that come around only when they want something?

Speaking of Prez O...I was in DC over the weekend with the fam. I tried to hit him up on Blackberry Messenger but no dice. Hey Prez O...send me your PIN, fam. We need to catch up.

Much thanks to Russ and LRenee for a great weekend. Gotta do it again...soon!

#7 is back on them streetz! Will/should the NFL Commissioner let him back in the League? Whut do U think?

I don't care how fine the fellas say Toya and Tiny's bodies are...I'm not watching their show. BET gets no love from me

Memo to Sprint...if this new phone don't work...I'm done with y'all. The iphone is only a click away.

Is it REALLY hard to date in 2009?

I think I'm gonna do a week of posts about relationships. Whut do u think?

I want some strawberry ice cream

Nuff respect to Skip Gates. I'm glad that you handled the racial profiling from the police with class. This incident show how far we STILL have to go when it concerns race relations.

Monica...Monica...Monica

it's in the game

I didn't ask for this shit.

I really didn't. I mean...I never thought it'd be like this.

When I was in college, I just had to worry about going to class and playing ball. Hell...I didn't NEED to go to class. Once the professor found out who I was and that I played ball, I knew I could pass that class. But I'm no dummy.

I went to class. I'm no dumb jock. I didn't major in Basket Weaving 101 like some of my teammates. I majored in marine bology.

People looked at me and thought that I wasn't smart until I opened my mouth and blew them away.

I handled college well...I dealt with the chicks and autograph seekers. Never had a steady girlfriend. Why should I? I could have any woman...any color...on our campus. I was the big man on campus. Everybody knew me. As my game became better on the court...more attention came. Then came the calls, emails, and text msgs from the agents. That was annoying.

I hate doing interviews but my college coach told me that I had to "play the game" with the media. They can make or break you.

Things are different now. I'm in the pros now. This ain't what I thought it'd be. Don't get me wrong...it's fun but not lilke I thought it'd be. College was the time of my life when i was playing ball. This is just a business.

I have to deal with agents, marketing reps, lawyers. I also have to deal with groupies and hanger on dudes. The groupies are unreal. They are everywhere. They are in every city and at every party that I go to. Most of them are willing to "do whatever it takes" to snag a baller like me. I don't need that baby drama in my life. I want to have kids one day. But I also want to be married and committed to one woman.

I've slept with more women than I'd care to admit to. I always protect myself but I need to stop doing what I'm doing.

Sometimes I feel like I'm caught in the middle of some "social pyramid." I mean, I'd like to hang at clubs and listen to hip hop with people who are my age but I don't want to have to fear for my life in that type of scene. I have the income and the "status" to party with the "suits" but I don't feel comfortable around those people for long periods of time. Some of them respect me more for my athletic prowess than my intelligence. So, I feel like I'm in the middle sometimes.

Y'all just don't understand. You only see what I do athletically. You see the fame and the millions that I make. You don't see me for who I am. Some of you see me as a piece of meat. I'm here to entertain you. I'm not. I'm here to play a sport b/c that's what I love to do...well...what I used to love to do. It's just a business now.

What if your salary was published in a newspaper where everybody knew how much money you made?

What if your successes and failures at work were publicly scrutinized on a daily basis?

What if you didn't want the spotlight because you knew it'd burn the hell outta you?

My life is your entertainment.

Can it be that it was all so simple then?

I didn't ask for this shit.

thoughts from your favorite pro athlete

two fingaz

Peace…it’s ova. Chuckdadeuces at the state of Minnesota. As many of you know, I have spent the last 4 months doing contract work for a company that was located in Minneapolis. The assignment is now over and I’m back in Atlanta. It was a great experience. I had my apprehensions at first. I mean, I had prayed for the job and the Lord heard my prayer but I didn’t expect that the job would take me away from my family. But it worked out. The company paid for me to fly back to Atlanta on the weekends, hotel suite, rental car, and per diem. So, I can’t complain. The job paid well and that’s ALWAYS a good thing. I’m glad to be back home. There’s nothing betta than being with your family. I missed em. The next assignment starts in a few weeks but it’ll be here…and that’s a good thing.



I was glad that I didn’t see Minnesota in the winter time. However, the weather there is very strange. When I got there in March, it was 65 degrees. Three days later…it snowed. In fact, the last day that we saw snow was April 15. I will miss those 80 degree summer days. While y’all were dealing with the brutal summer heat or the endless rainy days, we had very good weather. Gotta give a shout out to fellow bloggers Arafasse and Sexxy Luv. Sorry we didn’t get a chance to link up. Maybe next time. It was good kickin it in your city, tho.

Here’s a couple of things that I learned while I was there…

Minnesota does have black people. I was under the impression that we weren’t there but we are. Not like New York, Atlanta or Houston but we’re there.

Even though there was somebody who cleaned my room every day, I would make sure that I didn’t leave my room messy before I went to work. I know... it’s strange.

Club Seven is nice

Minneapolis might be one of the most liberal places that you’ll find. Race doesn’t seem to be an issue. It has to be the capital for interracial relationships. Almost EVERYBODY is in a interracial relationship.

Mall of America. What can I say about this place. It's HUGE. You could literally spend the entire day there. I'll be the first to admit that I hate malls. I never spend more than an hour in a mall and I hate crowds. But this place is a must see. Six levels (i think) of stores, stores, and more stores. I found myself at the Mall of America several times despite my disdain for malls. I enjoyed the MOA. Pics were taken from the foot court...

AJs Chicken & Fish on Lake Street...My favorite wing spot in the Twin Cities. This place had wings that were better than any wing spot in Atlanta. The spot is owned by a Serbian dude. Go figure.

The Vikings fans really want Brett Favre to play for them. Not sure why?!? The Minnesota Timberwolves are in disarray (drafting all of those point guards). The Minnesota Twins fans are looking forward to playing in the new stadium (Target Field). Unlike their current stadium, they’ll be playing outside.

I didn't go fishing. In fact, I caused a huge raucus in the office when I made the confession that despite having grown up in the state of South Carolina, I've never been fishing. After I said that, everybody was trying to take me out on a nearby lake. In the land of 10,000 lakes...I bypassed all of em.

I had some “interesting co-workers”. I saw a lotta crazy stuff. It’s interesting to see what folks will do when they are way from home. (gotta blog on it next time)

Shout out to the fellaz that hooped with me at LA Fitness in St. Paul.

The last two things I learned…I already knew but they were re-enforced even more…

I have a great wife. She really held it down while I was gone. Not only did she have to deal with our 3 lil ones but the every day drama at work. Not to mention, running around…taking Deion to baseball practice…etc. Keeping the house in order and then only being able to see me on the weekends. Sometimes I’d be home every other weekend and I know that had to be tough. But that’s what she is…tough. Strong black woman. If the shoe were on the other foot and she left and I had to do it all…I dunno if I could have done what she did. Period. I’m thankful and blessed to have her.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Nuff said

Kyle

Rare Air

I'm gonna offer a different perspective of Steve McNair. I want to tell you some things that you may or may not know about the man. I never had the opportunity to meet the man but I knew of him quite well. My former college teammate, Anthony Cook, was drafted in the same year as McNair by the Houston Oilers. They were teammates for several years. Another good friend, Eddie Robinson, Jr, played several years with McNair and was on the team that McNair led to the Super Bowl. McNair and I also graduated the same year. His school, Alcorn State, never played my school, South Carolina State but I followed his career. I felt like I knew him. In the game of football, there's a brotherhood. You don't have to be on the same team but we all share a bond. Nevertheless, I knew Steve McNair.

I knew Steve McNair as Air McNair

I knew Steve McNair was a helluva quarterback

I knew Steve McNair gained more than 6000 yds rushing and passing and threw for 53 touchdowns during his senior year.

I knew Steve McNair was the highest draft pick to come from a HBCU.

I knew Steve McNair led the way for the current crop of black quarterbacks in the NFL. When he entered the NFL, some media referred to him as a "black quarterback". When was the last time you've heard somebody refer to Donovan McNabb's skin color.

I knew that Steve McNair played the violent game of football in pain. He played hurt...a lot.

I knew that Steve McNair ALMOST won a Super Bowl on a great last drive.


I don't know Steve McNair.

I don't know about why Steve McNair was "dating" this 20 yr old woman.

I don't know what kinda marital problems Steve McNair was having.

I don't know what kinda husband or father Steve McNair was.

I don't know why Steve McNair was cheating.

One thing I do know...it ain't my none of my damn business! And it ain't yours, either! For the past few days, I've listened to this man's name be degraded, judged and dragged through the mud by many people who have done the same thing. Even if you've never cheated, no one should pass judgement on the man. Steve McNair didn't kill himself. He was murdered in cold blood. He was the VICTIM.

Infidelity does not normally lead to death. Over the past few days, I've listened to people say things that have really pissed me off. Steve didn't ask to be murdered. Steve's infidelity should not have taken him off this earth. You could say that the infidelity was a by-product that led to his death but McNair didn't deserve this. McNair's legacy will be what he did on the field and his charitable contributions off the field. His legacy will not be about some young, crazy woman who didn't think much about her life nor his. Keep this in mind, Steve McNair was MURDERED by somebody who he trusted. And there have been some to suggest that he "brought this on himself." That's bullshit. It does't matter what you think about his decisions to date a 20 year old waitress despite being a married man with 4 sons. He's dead and there ain't no coming back from that.

I don't think this will serve as a lesson to men (or women) who cheat. Magic Johnson got HIV in '91 and yet there are STILL people have babies by 3 or 4 different baby mammas. The lesson here is that you must be careful of the company that you keep...male or female.

Shame on those of you who are throwing stones. Steve McNair was somebody's father, son, brother, uncle, cousin, friend, teammate, frat brother, and yes...husband. They will mourn him forever when this story is no longer a headline.

I may have pissed some of you off with this post. If i did...good! Put the stone down. You don't know Steve McNair

I do.

off tha dome

it's been a minute...i know

random thoughts...

i'm not going to see transformers. i didn't see the first movie. wasn't a fan of the cartoon. yeah...i said it

ok...will people stop asking me about governor sanford from south carolina. i'm FROM south carolina but i don't vote there. i haven't lived there in years.

since you asked...here's my .02. if you're willing to risk it all for a brawd in anutha country...she betta be fine! i mean finer than frog hair (shout out to rawdawgbuffalo...lol)

i don't pass judgement but i could understand if it was his secretary. no, this fool falls for the out of town chick. he gets the award

gonna be on the grill this weekend. come to the crib. bring a bottle with you.

congrats to kobe and the lakers. you won. *yawn*...is it football season yet?

why are we hearing from dick cheyney all of a sudden? i've heard more in the last month from him than i did the 8 years that he was the vice president.

death of autotune!!! <-------thank you Jay Z. You da bess...youda, youda,youda bess.

word on the street is that janet jackson has dumped jermaine dupri just weeks after this fool had her face tattoo'd on his ribcage. if sanford didn't get the dummy award...dupri would get it.

maybe it's just me...but if you're 7 mos pregnant, you prolly shouldn't be wearing a shirt with your belly exposed.

speaking of fashion, memo to the ladies...sundresses can't be worn by every woman.

chris brown beats up rhihanna and gets no time in jail? umm...they betta be glad she ain't my daughter.

funny how r kelly had sex (then pissed) on a minor but y'all still listen to his music? wow

speaking of music, i'm gonna pass on the eminem cd. i ain't feelin it.

i didn't have the heart to tell dude that he should throw these things away



i finally went to sleep on a plane last week. aren't you proud of me?

don't you hate it when people say..."guess who did _____?" why do you want me to guess? i don't want to guess. just tell me!

sometimes you gotta just go through your phone and delete people. especially if you haven't talked to them in over a year and the number has only been dialed when you saved it in your phone.

fellaz- if you spend half the night telling a chick about how much money you have, you can't be mad and call her a gold digger later.

prez O might be cooler than me. maybe...

ladiez- "you'll never find a man, until you find yourself." - Common. <------so true

i've been watching a lot of the history channel lately. very impressive

twitter...You da bess...youda, youda,youda bess.

almost everbody is on twitter.

what if Jesus was on twitter? that would be cool to get a tweet from Jesus (@12kyle you betta be in church on this sunday...or else)

ok...that last thought was wrong...but funny.

regina king...regina king...regina king

goodnturrible

As we celebrate Black Music Month, we can be reminded of some of the great music that has been made for generations.

But we can also be reminded of some BAD music that was made. I'm reminded of some bad purchases that I made everytime I walk past my cd rack...

Da Brat (the last cd that she released)

Ill Al Scratch (don't ask)

just to name a few...

What about you? What was the worst cd, cassette tape, or 8 track that you've ever purchased?

Hollatchaboi

mood muzik

Music brings out different types of emotions. I don' think there is any debating that.

Music can inspire your creativity.

Music can get you pumped up.

Music can stimulate you...in more ways than one.

Music can enhance intimacy...as you know.

I remember back in the day when almost every dude had a cassette tape. On that tape, he had recorded a compilation of songs that he could play when it was time to get busy with his girl. All of the songs were slow jams. Songs that were made for love making.

If you were making a "mood muzik" tape for you and your man/woman, gimme a song(s) that you'd put on the tape.

I'd have to say Moments in Love by the Art of Noise. That joint was like 7 or 8 mins long. No words. If you neva heard it...youtube it.

Whut you got?

whoyoutakin???

The month of June is the month that we celebrate Black music. Unlike the executive sukkaz at BET, we're gonna celebrate the month this week at the 12th Planet.

Let's get it started...

If you had to pick one of the two artists in each category during their PRIME...whoyoutakin?



Prince or Michael Jackson

Luther Vandross or Babyface

Biggie or Tupac

Beyonce or Janet Jackson

Rakim or Jay Z

Natalie Cole or Aretha Franklin

Whitney Houston or Mary J Blige

Aaliyah or Toni Braxton

Ne-Yo or Usher

NWA or Public Enemy

Boys II Men or New Edition

Jodeci or Dru Hill

Keisha Cole or Jill Scott

James Brown or Mc Hammer

Lil Wayne or TI

Common or Scarface

En Vogue or SWV

KRS One or Big Daddy Kane

Musiq Soulchild or Joe

Snoop Dogg or Nas

Maxwell or D'Angelo

Stevie Wonder or Ray Charles

Ludacris or Jadakiss

Jennifer Hudson or Jazmine Sullivan

Stetsasonic or The Roots

Foxxy Brown or Lil Kim


remember that you can pick as many as you want...or you can pick em all.

so...whoyoutakin???

t-w-i...

"Just sat down on the plane next to a fat dude who's sweaty and leaning on me. This is gonna be a looooong flight."


That was the text msg that I sent. I sat in between the fat man and my friend/co-worker Sherry. She saw the text msg just before I sent it. She started laughing.

"Who did you send that to?"

"It's a tweet. I'm on twitter."

"What's twitter?"


I've been asked this question several times. What is twitter? Well, here's the definition...

Twitter is a free social networking and micro-blogging service that enables its users to send and read each others' updates, known as tweets. Tweets are text-based posts of up to 140 characters, displayed on the author's profile page and delivered to other users - known as followers - who have subscribed to them. Senders can restrict delivery to those in their circle of friends or, by default, allow open access. Users can send and receive tweets via the Twitter website, Short Message Service (SMS) or external applications. The service is free over the Internet, but using SMS may incur phone service provider fees.

However, when people ask me...I can't define it so I usually tell them to join and they'll figure it out. LOL. Twitter has become my latest addiction. It's sharing my thoughts, actions, and whereabouts with a network of friends (called followers). It has become something that I've gravitated towards. For example, the tweet above could generate a conversation between me and 4 other people at once. That's the best way that I can describe it. I'm addicted and damn proud of it! LOL

I'm interested in my followers and vice versa. My twitter name is @12kyle. Some of my followers are some of my peeps who blog on a daily basis. For a blogger, twitter is a natural fit. It's a condensed version of blogging. I don't think it'll ever replace blogging for me because 140 characters ain't enough for me to convey my points. However, it is more than a fad. Twitter is a way of life. Some people enjoy the fact that they can follow celebs and atheletes. Some will actually send tweets back to you...so there's a connection. I'm not big on celebs and athletes b/c I would much rather interact with my peeps. Unlike Facebook, Twitter helps me process my train of thought.

I could go on and on about Twitter but I won't. The influence of twitter made the cover of Time mag this week. You don't need me to pitch it ot you. I'm hooked. And if you try it...you will be too. Beware!

time2mend

I remember getting a phone call from my Dad a few years ago.

It went something like this...

Dad: "Hey...I've got some sad news...your grandfather passed away."

Me: "Really. Wow. Sorry to hear that."

And that was about it. If it sounds strange to you, that's because it was strange. It was strange to me because I didn't know him. I had only spoken with him over the phone once. I knew that he lived in Los Angeles for almost 20 yrs after leaving New Jersey. I didn't have a relationship with him because he didn't have one with my father. When my Dad gave me the news, it was almost like hearing that the old guy who lived down the street from you had passed away. I felt nothing. The fact that my grandfather's death didn't move me...bothered me. I mean, I was nearly in tears when Biggie died and I only knew him through his music. But I wasn't emotional upon learning about the death of the man who created the man who created me. Very strange...

Dad and granddad's relationship went sour when he and my grandmother split when my dad was a teenager. Granddad drank a lot and he wasn't "nice to be around" once he had that "oil" in his body. They had a bad relationship. When he died, dad wasn't mad at him. He seemed to be content with knowing that he loved his father and his father loved him. But I missed out on having a grandfather. Missed out on his wisdom. The fence was never mended. He and dad never connected again like a father/son should be. The one positive thing about their relationship is that dad vowed that if he ever had a son...he'd make sure that he'd be close to his son and be a better father than he had. And he did that for me and my brother.

Life is long...but it's also short. Tommorrow is not promised to any of us. Almost all of us have someone...parent, spouse, sibling, friend...that we should mend our fences with. We all assume that we'll be here forever but we know better. Sometimes people get relationships/friendships go awry and we don't even remember what happened. Life is too short to go around being mad at someone.

Maybe this post will move you to mend a fence with someone in your life.

Maybe...

friendly skies

"I don't like the way this sounds."


These were the words coming from one of the flight attendents on the airplane that I was on the other day.

The flight attendents were passing out peanuts when the pilot ordered them back to their seats. Apparently, we were headed for some turbulence. I've never been on a flight when they had to tell the flight attendents to sit down. My mind began to race. Heart started pumpin a lil faster. You see...ole 12kyle hates turbulence. I want my flight to be smoooooth. None of that bumpy stuff. Unfortunately, I have no control over it.


I remember flying back from my honeymoon in Jamaica. We hit some bad weather. I mean, thunderstorms and everything. I can't lie...I was shook. Mrs12 found my "fear" to be soooooo amusing. So, as I was having a fit...she was laughing. She told me it was ok. As the plane rattled and dipped, she held my hand (I see y'all laughin' but this shit aint funny...lol).


Back to my flight, I remain calm as the flight gets rocky. I remind myself that I'm safer in the air than I am behind the wheel of a car. I also remind myself of the dream that I had 7 yrs ago. In the dream, I'm on a plane and it crashes. There is only 1 survior in the wreckage. And guess who it was...ME!!!!


Don't get it twisted...I don't ever think about dying. I plan to be around as long as Moses was. LoL. I'll prolly go out in my sleep real mellow like at the age of 135. So please understand...if y'all hear about a plane going down and I'm on it...dammit y'all betta come and find me. Because I'ma make it!

K.O.S

Sometimes you can amaze yourself by what you've learned...

More importantly, you can amaze yourself even more by what you've learned about yourself.



For me, I'm not sure the exact moment when it happened. I was in high school. I think I was in the 11th grade. It was that moment when I gained the knowledge of self (K.O.S). It was the time when I REALLY learned who I was. I knew where I had come from. And I knew where I was going. So many people go for many years without knowing who they are. They spend so much time "trying to find themselves." I guess you can never be too late in finding who you are but you don't want to be 40 yrs old and realize that you spent your 20s and 30s "looking for yourself." By then, you've let some great years pass you by.

From the time when I discovered who I was when I looked in the mirror, the way that I viewed life was much different than before. Confidence and self esteem begins to grow. I think once you know who you are...you capitalize on your strengths but not bound by your weaknesses.

What about you? At what point in your life did you find yourself? Are you still looking?

Hollatchaboi

12 on 7

As many of you heard, Michael Vick is back on the street. He spent nearly 2 yrs in jail and is now on house arrest following his felony conviction for bank rolling an illegal dogfighting ring. Vick, the former #1 overall pick by the Atlanta Falcons, is currently serving a suspension that was handed down by the NFL's commissioner Roger Goddell. Vick will be on house arrest for 2 months. After he completes that, he will apply to be re-instated back into the NFL. Vick's release from prison and the possibility of a return has sparked a huge debate. Some believe that Vick should NEVER be let back in the NFL. Others believe that he's paid his debt to society and he should have the opportunity to play again if a team wants him. Everybody has an opinion on it. Here's my take...

I think I've been able to view Vick's situation from a different perspective. I'm a fan. Not only am a fan of the Falcons but I watched every game that Mike Vick ever played for my team. Unlike these smucks who've watched Vick on SportsCenter highlights for years. They don't have a clue. I have also owned a dog or 2 for most of my life. I love dogs. I'd own a dog right now if I could. My first memories on this earth involve me and my dog.

Let me preface my statements by saying that what Vick did was horrible and cruel. NO ANIMAL DESERVES THAT! Vick was dead wrong. He can't blame it on ignorance. He knew what he was doing was wrong. To be honest, if he had never gotten into trouble...he'd probably STILL be fighting dogs. Not only what he did was horrible, it was downright stupid. Vick's contract was worth 130 million. There's no way that you should risk 130 million for a few thousand dollar bets. That's what he did. I'll never understand that. You squander millions for thousands??? Now...I wasn't the best student in math...but I know that's backwards. Nevertheless, Vick did time for the crime that he committed. Personally, I don't think he should've served time. But he broke the law and that's it. I don't think you should go to jail for driving 75mph in a 35mph speed zone but if that's what the law is...then you have to obey the law. Vick has paid his debt to society. He doesn't owe me an apology. He doesn't owe me any money. He has kids that he has to take care of. He has a family to provide for. He has a life to live. I can't tell him how he should do it.

The big debate is "should Vick be allowed to play in the NFL again." Some say that he should be allowed to come back. However, there is a huge segment of the sports community that thinks that he should be suspended and not be allowed to play again. Huh? Are you kidding me? It's funny to me how people find "certain things" to stand on their morals. Don't get me wrong...dogfighting is a cruel. But would you want a dude on your team who is a convicted felon for dogfighting (Vick) or a dude who has been convicted of another crime? The NFL is full of dudes who have been in trouble with the law. Wanna dude who killed another human while he was drunk behind the wheel...go pick Leonard Little. Wanna dude who has been brought up on domestic charges for smacking women and even spitting on women...go pick Larry Johnson . Wanna dude who was "involved" but charged with obstructing justice in murder investigation...go pick Ray Lewis. Wanna dude who started a fight in a strip club and a hail of bullets that left a man paralyzed for life...go pick Adam "Pacman" Jones. I could go on and on. The bottom line is that there is crime in society so you;re gonna have crime in professional sports. I'm not absolving Vick for his horrendous act but I don't think killing another human is the same. These dudes are STILL in the NFL but people are saying that Vick shouldn't be allowed back in? Get off your high horse.

Most of Vick's downfall is his own fault. However, some of the blame falls at the feet of his former employer, the Atlanta Falcons. No...the Falcons didn't put 4 grand on lil Sparky. The Falcons made far too many concessions for Vick. The Falcons were too busy trying to cash in on the "Mike Vick Experience". They were too busy trying to make him the face of the franchise and he had no interest in that. Vick is a quiet dude. He was the star who didn't want to be the star. There were far too many times when Vick was the last one on the practice field and the 1st one to leave. You can't be the franchise QB and do that. I have friends in the Falcons front office and they all say that there was too much "coddling the superstar QB." No one will openly say that the Falcons knew that Vick was fighting dogs but they all say that the "Falcons knew SOMETHING was going with him." I can't put alotta blame on the Falcons. Vick was getting paid as much as Peyton Manning and Tom Brady. Too bad he didn't dedicate himself to the game like they do.

For those who say Vick should "come back and play another position"...save your breath. The dude made the Pro Bowl 3 out of 5 yrs as a starter. You don't get to be an All-Star just b/c you're mediocre. If Vick came back tomorrow, he's better than half the QB's in the NFL right now. Vick is a tremendous athlete and a decent QB. He needs a lotta work on his game. I remember when people would be critical of him for running too much but if you watched any Falcons games...you'd know why he was running. The Falcons had a horrible offensive line. And we had the worst wide receivers in the NFL...hands down. For as much as the Falcons profited from Vick, they never surrounded him with a decent offensive line nor a great wide receiver. However, things have changed for the Falcons. They made the playoffs last year and have a very good QB in Matt Ryan. Some will say that the whole Vick saga has to do with race. I don't think it does. I know white people who loved Vick and rooted harder for him than anybody else. I know black people who don't like Vick.

In the end, everybody deserves a second chance.

"The value of compassion cannot be over-emphasized. Anyone can criticize. It takes a true believer to be compassionate. No greater burden can be borne by an individual than to know no one cares or understands."- Arthur H. Stainback

watchwhutusay2me

If you've ever read this blog, you'll learn one thing about me...I'm very careful with words. I always have been. It's a trait that I learned from my Dad. You have to be careful about what you say, how you say it, and more importantly...how it can be interpereted.

Case in point. The NBA Playoffs are in full swing right now. Teams are doing whatever they can to win and move toward winning the championship. Sometimes peoples emotions can get the best of them. And sometimes feelings...and words can change things. In the series between the Dallas Mavericks and the Denver Nuggets, the competitive forces spilled off the courts and things got crazy off the court. After getting beat by Denver on a last second shot, the Mavs were distraught. They complained to the refs about the Denver's "rough play" and their tactics. After the game, the Mavericks owner, Mark Cuban, was furious. If you know anything about Cuban, you'll know that he's a man who doesn't hold his tongue. Cuban, a self made billionare, is very competitve. Feeling the frustrations of a tough playoff loss, Cuban said something that he would later regret saying.

As Cuban was walking toward the Mavericks locker room where he was headed to see his players, he came upon some fans. Some of the fans were Maverick fans...and some were Denver Nuggets fans. One of the Nuggets fans that he walked past was the mother of the Nuggets starting power forward Kenyon Martin. Cuban should have just walked past the lady because she didn't say anything to him. But he opened his mouth. According to reports, he said to her..."Your son is a punk! That team is a bunch of thugs!!!"

Then he stormed off.

Hold up!!! Did you just tell that woman that her son is a punk and a thug? Are you kidding me????

I can understand being frustrated but that was out of line. That was ignorant. I have a problem with the whole situation. Here's my take...

In my humble opinion, the word "thug" gives off an extreme negative image. Growing up, a thug was somebody who'd beat you up and take your money...or somebody who'd hide in an alley and steal an old lady's purse. Nowadays, the term "thug" means something totally different. I think "thug" is the new way of saying the N word. Before you start thinking that the last statement was racist, I've heard white, black, and hispanic people use that term in that way. And that is my perception of the word. It's a "cleaner" way of saying the N word (and I'm not gonna talk about the use of the N word b/c that's another subject for another day). Do I think Cuban is racist? I dunno. I doubt it. But I don't know the man.

Secondly, Kenyon's mom had nothing to do with what happened on the court. Why even bring her into it?

Thirdly, that was very cowardly. As a man, you say what you have to say about another man...to his face. Mark Cuban is about 5-9. Kenyon Martin is 6-10. He could probably break that dude in half if he wanted to. He would have never called Keyon Martin a thug or a punk in his face.

Lastly, he crossed the lines. He later apologized and offered to take Martin and his family out to dinner. He even offered his family a suite at the Mavericks Arena. Too little...to late. Let's take it away from the NBA and put it in perspective. What if you were leaving work and your supervisor walked up to your mom, who came to your job to see you, and called you a punk or a thug...or worse? Let's just say that he had better be glad that he didn't say it in front of MY mom. He would have got his ass kicked!

sometimesiwunder

sometimesiwunder...

when did it become cool to make a fool of yourself on national tv...

when did it become cool to lack respect and self discipline...

when did it become cool to allow young kids to cuss at grown people...

when did it become cool to expect maximum results despite giving lackluster efforts...

when did it become cool to be dumb...

when did it become cool to disrespect women...

when did it become cool to be a hoe...and be proud of it...

when did it become cool to have kids and not be in their lives to watch them grow...

when did it become cool to spend money foolishly...

when did it become cool to tell every detail about your business...

when did it become cool to be proud to lose control...

when did it become cool to love him/her...more than you love yourself...

when did it become cool to have your pants fallin off your azz...

when did it become cool to worry about color...

when did it become cool not to care...

if this defines cool...well...





i guess i'm lame.

off tha dome

random thoughts...

who knew that swine would cause so much of a fuss???

this swine flu will NOT stop me from eating bacon. i mean...breakfast ain't breakfast without bacon

chicago bulls vs boston celtics was one of the best nba series that i've ever seen. why can't every game be like those games?

prez obama still has some openings in his administration. maybe i should email him my resume

ladies...what is a bigger turn off...a 30 yr old man who plays video games for more than 5 hrs a day or a 30 yr old man who lives at home with his parents who have money?

fellas...what is a bigger turn off...a woman with no kids and no job or a woman with 2 jobs and 2 kids?

i guess you can say that you don't wanna be around me when i have my phone in my hand...nobody is safe. dude was snoring.

i could've sworn that i saw sarah palin alongside the highway the other day...picking up trash.

i really don't understand the whole "first 100 days thing" for prez o. i'm willin to bet that bush spent 70 of his first 100 days on vacation.

don't you hate to see kids on their way to school with NO books in their hands?

ok...ok...enough of the ray j show talk. i don't know who danger is and i don't wanna know.

did i hear correctly??? rick ross said he wants to battle eminem??? puleeez! rick ross don't wanna battle me! and i can't rap!

i turned the radio on today and i could only take it for 10 mins. radio sucks

my boy mr.socialite had a great line the other day. he said "he paid $299 for a piece of crack." i did too. lol. i hardly ever put the crackberry down.

something about spring puts a smile on your face

if i see one more dude saggin with his pants fallin off his ass, i'ma sceam!!!

gonna invest heavily into hand sanitizer

shout out to my boy e aka eclectic relaxation aka the king of randomness. he's shuttin down his blog. gonna miss u fam. come thru and holla at me.

i'm growin' a lil tired of the overusage of the word "swagger" or "swag". you shouldn't have to turn your swag on. it should always stay on

words to live by..."if you stay ready...you don't ever have go get ready."

Nia Long...Nia Long...Nia Long

rEbOuNd

reb.

rebound...every basketball fan is familiar with the term.

But I aint talkin hoops today.

I used to say..."If you date somebody for a year and then you break up, you should be single for a year." Now that theory can't be applied if you've been with somebody for 6 yrs...but you get my point. The thing that you're avoiding is jumping into another relationship too soon.

For example, if you date somebody for a year (seriously) but you break up...then you're in another relationship in 3 months...THAT'S a rebound relationship.

I'll be the first to admit that I did this...ONCE. I didn't get into another relationship b/c I wanted to have a girlfriend. I did it to get OVER a girlfriend. I wasn't a dog or anything. Just did it for the wrong reasons. She stepped to me and the rest was history.

Is it so there something in us that wants to be in relationships when we KNOW that we aint ready?

Have you ever been in a rebound relationship?

Hollatchaboi!