Wednesday, July 16, 2008

the magic number


I don't recall, ever graduatin at all
Sometimes I feel I'm just a disappointment to y'all
Every day, I just lay around then I can't be found

Always asked to give me some livin life like a bum

Times is rough, my auntie got enough problems of her own

Nigga, you supposed to be grown

I agree, I try to be the man I'm 'posed to be

But negativity is all you seem to ever see

I admit, I've done some dumb shit

And I'm probably gon do some mo'

You shouldn't hold that against me though (Why not?)

Why not? My music's all that I got

But some time must be ingested for this to be manifested

Cee-Lo from Goodie Mob (Git Up, Git Out)

The other day I was having a conversation with Mrs12. One of her best friends has a daughter who just turned 13. I can imagine that turning 13 is an exiting time for a young girl. I know it was fun for me. Anyway...she was given a cell phone so that she could always be in touch with her parents. She's a good kid and a great student. She's focused and mild mannered.

Here's the situation...at her parents request, she is not to talk to little boys on her cell phone. Period. When Mrs12 told me this, it made me think. I respect the decision that Mrs12's friend has given to her daughter. She is a very good mother and they have a very close relationship.

I told Mrs12 that it's interesting b/c this was the age when young Kyle used to get on the phone and talk to the ladies for hours. In fact, I'd call my boy Zell and we'd call chicks on a 3 way call and harass the chicks...lol (remember that Zell??) I know that it was a different time back then but if I couldn't talk to girls on the phone then...there was no need for me to talk on the phone.


My question is this...


are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?


what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.


how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!


There are no right or wrong answers. Even if you don't have kids, I'm sure that you know what age would be appropriate for these things. And let's just assume that the kids that we're hypothetically speaking of are kids who are ones that don't have their pants falling off their ass or one of these HOT little girls.


Hollatchaboi!

35 comments:

PrettyBlack said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?

NOT IF YOU WERE TAUGHT RIGHT.

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

NEVER IF SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO, BUT A LITTLE LIP GLOSS AT 16.

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.

16- JUNIOR IN HIGH SCHOOL WITH EXCELLENT GRADES.

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!

ABOUT 16...I WAS STILL PLAYING WITH BARBIES IN 9TH GRADE.

Dreamy said...

yes to me 13 is too young to be talking to boys of the opposite sex, they are not making kids like how they used to.

hmmmm the ideal age for my potential child to wear make up would be about 15 or 16

the age would have to be about 17 to have supervised visits,lol

1st off i was not allowed to do those things, with my moms boyfriend around, we were on "CC" lockdown.


i didnt start doing all that stuff until after he left at the age of 17. then i went buck azz wild,lol

Dreamy said...

shame huh,lol???

and i was trying to be 1st, got doggit prettyblack!!!

The Jaded NYer said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?

In today's sexed-up, Gossip Girl/Tila Tequila world? YES, 13 is too young!

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

19/20... young faces don't NEED make-up. maybe I'd relent for special occasions but that's it

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.

17/18... I want to make sure we have that college acceptance letter before dudes come sniffing around!

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!

>I was not allowed on the phone PERIOD so for me it was 18

>I still wear little to no make-up... I think I may have tried some at 13 but never stuck to it. that's just too high maintenance for me

>again, I wasn't allowed visitors of either sex, so this doesn't apply to me either... no wonder I started wildin' out in college!!

The Flyyest said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex? NO...BUT THERE SHOULD BE A CUT OFF TIME!!!! I WAS TALKING TO BOYS AROUND 14 BUT THESE DAYS, GIRLS ARE FAST!!!!

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up? I THINK FOR PROM!!!! AND AFTER...I WORE EYELINER WHEN I WAS 15-16

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house. 15....GUYS USED TO ALWAYS COME TO MY HOUSE BUT IT WAS LIKE A GROUP THING

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!
ANSWERED ABOVE

Mizrepresent said...

I think 13 is a good age.

supervised visits at 16

16 for makeup

I was 16 before i could have a supervised visit, before then they could sit on the porch.

Keisha "Kitten" Isaacs said...

Hey Brother!

I was way ahead of my age...not a good thing...but it is what it is...would I want another child to do the same....NO! I think that at age 13 kids need to be focused on their education....my friends were having babies at 13...because we were not redirected to the more important things in life...which truly was not and is not sex...dating...k-i-s-s-i-n-g!

I see little girls with make up on...and it makes me sick to my stomach...in such a rush to be a woman...personally..I'm not trying to have my daughter walking around with make-up on as a shorty...I don't wear make up...what my daughter look like wearing make up.....and she's 7! lol

I don't know what I think is a good age to date or have supervised visits with the opposite sex...BUT I'm gonna pray day and night for God to lead me as a mother on all things that relate to my children...this topic included....Figure I can't go wrong...seeking him for the answers at hand...

Darius T. Williams said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?

Yup - in this day and age, I'm thinking 15 is a good age to start.

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

I'm thinking 16 is a good age.

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.

About 15/16 is a good time.

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!

I'm still not doing these things and I'm 26. Nah, I think I was a late bloomer - my situation is a bit different. So, for me, it was like when I was 17.

Anonymous said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex? I think it all depends on the kid. I would let my child talk on the phone at that age but I would definitely monitor what she's talking

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up? I'd say about 16-17. Children younger than that aren't going anywhere that they would need makeup.

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house. Again around 16-17 would be okay.

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!! I think my mum finally let me speak to guys on the phone when I was about 15. Before that I just spoke to them at school.

I don't really wear makeup now, except for eyeshadow and lipstick sometimes.

I think the first time I had a boy at my house (that my mum knew about) was when I was 16.

Eb the Celeb said...

I dont think 13 is too young to talk on the phones with boys... but there shouldnt definitely be a stricter time in which you can talk to them... for instance... not after 9pm

all the others I would say 16...

I started having visits from the opposite sex (not always supervised) lol when I was 15. But when I was 14 would have my mom drop me off at the movies with friends knowing we were meeting boys there and would have a fake date...lol

I didn't start wearing make-up until college. And that was just a little gloss, eye liner and mascara... I didn't start wearing foundation until I moved to NYC 4 years ago... I was never that girlie girl that was into all that kind of mess


But why the heck are you asking all these questions.... you dont even have any girls...

you didn't think I was gon leave the planet without busting ya chops a bit did you? LOL

Anonymous said...

I was a little slow in my approach. I didn't start talking ot girls on the phone til I was almost 15. But then that quickly progressed to dating and visits at the crib.

If I had daughters I think I'd be pretty strict. I'd say minimum 14 before phone calls. And 15 before any dates or makeup and all that. Just too many predators out there for you to allow young girls to do that kind of stuff.

My cousin had his little niece staying with him this summer. She's 15 and he came home one day and she got boys in the closet and condoms in her pocket. I can't even imagine what I would have done. He called the police to get them little boys out of his house.

Brown Girl Gumbo said...

i don't have kids, but here are my thoughts:

No, 13 isn't too young to talk on the phone to the oppposite sex.

Girls shouldn't wear makeup until 15

I think 16 is a good time to have supervised visits from a girl

I was 15 when I went over to a boys house "unsupervised" However, I wouldn't recommend my daughter to do the same because there's no guarantee that she'll be as innocent as I was!!

Anonymous said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?

Aight.....1st let me preface this by stating that I was 'lucky' enough to get my '1st piece of trim' at the tender age of 12 (not bragging.....just tellin' da truth). Now that I have two daughters [Nia (re: my last post discussing Love Jonez), 6 , but going on 36, and will be 7 on 24 JUL, and Zoe, just turned 4, but going on 24), I do have an opinion on how I plan to deal with this situation. I have no problem with giving my daughter(s) a celly at 13, but BEST BELIEVE that their behavior/grades in school will be on pizoint, and the will not be allowed to be on the phone after 9:00 PM. As for who they speak to.....I plan on being very open with my daughters, and hope that they will be very open with me, so with whom they converse with on the phone doesn't concern me....as long as I know who the whippersnapper's name is, where he lives, who his parents are, AND "how he rolls" (don't ack like you don't know what I'm talkin' about....). Now as for the other stuff.....

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

My girls have their OWN make-up glam kits, respectively, so they can 'glam up' at home, but as for wearing make-up outside to 'look good' when they are already beautiful to me, age 16 sounds about right to me.

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.

Funny....I was watching the Deion and Pillar Sanders Show a while ago, when Prime Time's daughter, Deiondra (go figure....lol) wanted to go out on a date. I think that 16 is the age that I'll CONSIDER having this happen.....and of course, the school aspect will come into play.

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)?

Again....refer to said comments at the beginning of this post. My first date was at age 13 (meeting at the movies....I'm the oldest, so I was able to do a lot of things....as long as my school situation was skr8). Also, I went to 8 proms.....2 my sophomore year, and 3 each my junior and senior years, so you can make your own assumptions from there.....heh heh heh

Boogie

Anonymous said...

Weither you think 13 is too young or not, children these days are talking to the other sex all the time. From my view (not a parent but a teacher) these type things go on all the time. I have taught on all levels and have been on the elementary level for the last 5 years and during this time I have seen some things that you would not believe (let me say upfront that the school that I teach at is considered to be a top of the line school, we wear uniforms and have a very strict academic policy and our parents are required to do volunteer hours or their child will not be able to return the next school year). I have seen 4th and 5th graders get caught kissing, holding, and fondling. They even sit in class and text. Some 3rd graders have been caught doing the same things. There was even one day as I was in the pre-k class that I noticed a student (boy) sprawl open the legs of a doll and decide to play with the doll's private area and did so until he was caught and he didn't seem bothered at all when he was.

When I taught middle school we had 6th graders that came into the school already having had a baby, which means that they were engaging in sexual activity prior to arriving in middle school and even continue to have sex and some even with multiple partners. The ones that some how managed to get pregnant while we were there even had baby showers.

Sixteen is probably the earliest age that one should be wearing makeup but again there are 3rd, 4th and 5th graders that wear colored lip gloss while at school but are smart enough to remove it before the end of school so they are not caught by their parents.

You must keep also keep in mind that no matter how wonderful a parent is, kids will be kids and they will do what it is that they want to do. Peer pressure is on a much higher scale than when we were younger. It is also my opinion that it is the way that some of these parents raise their children that turns them to activities such as sex at an early age, sneaking around to talk with or be with the opposite sex, etc. You must have an open line of communication with your kids; you must be honest with them and allow them to be honest with you.

I have more to say but that's all for now....

Kyle what school did you say your kids go to?

Blah Blah Blah said...

Can she text boys?
What is the purpose of having a phone if you can't talk to whoever... If the mom is that afraid of the possibilities...she should have waited until said 13yo was maybe...18...?

16 is an ok for makeup...and even then...it's regulated to basics...gloss, mascara and maybe eyeliner.

15 or 16yo...and he has to be in the common areas...no going into any bedrooms, regardless if door is open.

I used to talk on the ohone to boys when I was 12...but it was silly shit (these days girls are HOT and boys are having sex at that age),I was about 15 when I started with the make up...I didn't have boys over until I was 17, my choice.

Blah Blah Blah said...

...I have boys...
I am sure if I had a girl...she'd be on lock down until 25...

Jazzy said...

I agree there is no wrong/right answer...it REALLY depends on the child.

I think it is a little dillusional (sp?) of the parents to tell her not to talk to boys on her phone...I bet she will find a way to anyway. There's a way around everything.

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

no, not if it is platonic or your what u think girlfriend, i was, then
8th grade

pink said...

maaaaaan im only 22 but boy do i wish i could go back to the days where you talked on the phone so long yo momma came in the room and told you to get the hell off the phone!

you hang up...no YOU hang up!! lol

ummmmm...i think by 7th/8th grade you should be able to talk to the opposite sex on the phone. i mean, its just the phone!! lol...thats when i started talkin to boys.

I dont think that make up is a good habit for girls to get into. it ruins your skin. lipgloss is ok at about 13....eyeshadows and mascara and stuff at 16....just teach them not to go over board.

i think by 9th grade you should be able to have opposite sex company while there parents are home.

My mom was never really pressed like that...i mean i wasnt buck wild but she was never eally strict on these things....we didnt have the makeup comvo cuz i wasnt into that until i was like 19 or so. and there were never a bunch of boys cuz ive always had the same bf for a while...i dated the same guy from 7th to 9th grade and then i dated someone else from the time i was 16 until 22...

Parents just keep in mind that while you may have these rules in place...your kids WILL deviate slightly...i mean hey, you did...lol

The F_Uitlist said...

are you too young at the age of 13 to be talking on the phone with members of the opposite sex?

No as long as the parents trust the kids it should be ok.

what is the ideal age for a young lady to wear make up?

I agree with Pretty Black, a little lip gloss at 16. I was at least 19 before I even wanted to wear makeup (off stage that is, I hated stage makeup too)

what is the ideal age for a boy to have a "supervised visit" at a girl's house.
I'd say 16 if they call themselves liking each other.

how old were you when you started doing these things (if you can remember that far back)? haaaa!!
I've always had male friends and so they were always at my house. So I can't say that there was a set age. They were always around anyway, and friendships, turned into likeship and so on and so on

Sexxy Luv said...

I would say wait until the child is 14 or 15.

i was wearing eye liner and lip gloss when i was in the 9th grade, so i say high school. but no foundation or eyeshadow!

i say 14.

i was talking on the phone at 13.

wearing eyeliner and lip gloss at 15.

and having a "supervised" visit being supervised by him and i at 16! lol

oh and 1st baby at 19!

and for that reason i am going to be on there azz like clean drawls!

ShellyShell said...

I say 13 is an appropriate age to start talking on the phone to the opposite sex. Shyt I was talking before that but that's all I was doing. My nephew is 13 and my sister decided to give him a phone because he's a good kid with good grades. I looked through his address book and there were more girls in there then boys..it was a mess! The little girls call him CONSTANTLY!!

I was a tomboy I don't think I started wearing gloss till 16-17. I didn't start wearing foundation until I was 25. But now I love eyeshadows and MAC gloss...lol!

I had male visitors starting at 9. My house was the one that was centrally located and we had a big azz porch so all the little kids would come over and chill outside. I always had more male friends then girls. I think it's because I played three sports so I just connected better with the boys! But I would say 14(entering 9th grade) for a supervised visit.

I grew up in the burbs upstate with a lot of WHITE KIDS. So they were running wild and my parents weren't having that! I remember being 13 and there was a party in the cemetery...yeah I said cemetary. I went and stayed all of 10 min. As we were leaving I saw people engagind in "69" on top of a huge gravestone. It was one of the most traumatic moments in my life. I RAN OUT OF THE CEMETARY!! These kids were 13 at the time. I was still playing with my barbies. I think I will write a 5 part post on growing up upstate...I just thought of a lot of other crazy shyt I witnessed at a young age!

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

Well I don't have children, and my brother (who does have children) tell me I'm too open with them (hey, they ask me a question, I'm giving them an honest answer).

Anways, with that being said, I don't know...having children is different than not having them. For me, I was allowed to talk to boys at 13 and they were allowed to come over...long as my mom was home and she knew the boy. About the makeup, I never was really into makeup until the 11th grade, and even that was just eye shadow and lip gloss so my mom didn't mind that. However, if I did have a child and she was younger than 17, only lipgloss can touch her face.

Its all about how you raise your child and that understanding bond between child and parent. Even though I could talk to my mom as though she was my best friend, I knew she wasn't on the same level as my best friend...she was much higher and demanded a lot more respect.

Kandi Black said...

hmmm...my lil brother be chopping it up with the girls and he's 14, so...i dunno...i guess it's okay as long as u keep it platonic

as far as makeup goes, i'd say MAYBE about 16 or 17...but it's not really required

i guess a boy can go visiting when he's like maybe 16 or above

and the marry wanna has blurred my memory on some of this stuff, but i didn't visit a boy until i was like 17...

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Different day and age. I have four girls and 1 boy. My 19yr old couldn't talk on the phone to boys until she was 16. I plan to follow the same course of action for the other two that are still at home. My 23yr old grew up with her mom in another state, I couldn't really put down any law in her crib.

Makeup -- never a big deal. The girls are naturally pretty and have a great enough self esteem not to feel a need to enhance.

Supervised visits -- I had a slightly different approach. I told my oldest, she could have one boy who could call/visit my house the entire time she was in high school, so she better choose wisely. That kept her reputation clean and guys respect her because she's cool, but not easy to run game on. She's the chick they all want (cause they can't have her). But she's up on game, so most dudes get the gas face.

I remember calling girls as early as 5th grade (10 yrs old), but we weren't talking about nothing. I didn't really date until high school.

tris. said...

i dont think 13 is too young to talk to boys on the phone. my lil sis was doing it. i didn't though. i was a tomboy and i thought boys were stink. lol.

but seriously if i have a daughter, there needs to be time limits and she can't talk after 8 or 9 or something.

the make-up thing is an eh eh. personally. i don't like make-up too much. the most i wear is mascara. but i cannot live without lip gloss. i never got into make-up cuz of my freckles and stuff so i dont want my daughter to either. lol.

i think boys are gonna do that type of stuff with or without permission. but if it was up to me.. he would have to be 15 or so.

i didnt start the whole boys shenanigans until i was like 15 going on 16. lol.

TravelDiva said...

Hey Kyle!

I think I started talking to boys on the phone around 12 or so, but I got in trouble for it once with my father. I had to start James Bond operations to do it! HA!

FYI - Posted pics of the trip on CITC!

CHA CHA said...

Yes 13,is to young to be talking or even thinking about having sex

the ideal age for girls to make up I would suggest is 14. Lip gloss is okay but not poppin, leave it to the bare min like one coat

The ideal age for a boy to have a supervised visit at a girls house I would say 15-16

I was in Junior High so I was maybe 15 or 16 when I started doing these things

Tiffany S. Jones said...

Hmmmm, I think I might have been 13 when I started talking to boys on the telephone. I'm not exactly convinced that my mom wasn't listening though.
But uh, after that, I talked to dudes on the phone all the time. I hung out with a lot of guys in high school and well, those were my friends. How are you going to stop a teenager from talking ont he phone?

Anonymous said...

Hi I'm a lurker who decided to come out of hiding, I was allowed to talk to boys on the phone when I was 10, and no I wasn't fast I was actually a tom boy, but I would talk to males and females, the phone was my life LOL in fact my Mom got me my own line because I was on it so much. Great Blog!!

dessex said...

Absolutely. My daughter (when I have a child) can talk on the phone to little boys at 16 (if I trust her) but at 13 that is just too young. All of these sexual predators around, that’s crazy. I can understand having a phone for emergencies but that’s just too young.

She can wear make up in high school I guess. I don’t want her to depend on that. I want her to love her skin without her make up.

Supervised visist….10th grade if I trust her.

And I started talking to girls at 14….and I probably shouldn’t have been doing that.

Stew said...

first off she would not have a phone at age 13.

she is not going to any boy's house, cuz i dont know nothing about that lil boy family. and he def is not coming to my house. they better go to a movie or something.

she can wear make up when she goes to prom, or is she is in a pageant or something like that.

i.can't.complain. said...

love this post.

i remember getting in trouble for having a boy call my house when i was in 9th grade.

sheltered, hunh?

my daughter (she's almost 3) is allowed to wear lip gloss and neutral nail polish now.

as for later when she wants to wear "real" make-up.... she's old enough to wear it when she's old enough to purchase it

with her own money... that she earned.

boy visits, hmmm. id say like 15 or so is a good age.

lil' boys are so manish... but u can't shelter kids forever.

-1-

12kyle said...

@ everybody
Thanks for your input. As I mentioned earlier...there really is no right or wrong answer.

I will say that some of the responses cracked me up.

@ Eb the Celeb
Beat it

@ anonymous #1
they go to the school of hard knocks

@ pink
"i wish i could go back to the days where you talked on the phone so long yo momma came in the room and told you to get the hell off the phone! you hang up...no YOU hang up!! lol CLASSIC!!!

@ anonymous # 2
Thanks for commenting. Feel free to participate. We won't bite you. LOL

Mo said...

....honestly, I don't even know.

I didn't do any of that until I graduated from high school; my mom was one of those "i'm strict but don't have to say it cuz my side eye says it all" mothers