Love, your happiness don't begin wit a man
Strong woman, why should you depend on a man
I understand you want a man that's resourceful
If he pay your bills, he feel like he bought you
Talkin to a friend, about what love is
Her man didn't love her, cuz he didn't love his
Hugged her from afar, said what I felt
You never find a man, till you find yourself
Time helps mistakes, you can learn from
Cuz one man fucked up men you shouldn't turn from
You want a certain type of guy, gotta reach a certain point too
At the destination, a king will annoint you
Goin through the storm, many bodies stay warm
That relationship died, for you to be born, you worth more
Than anything you could cop in a store
For you to grow he had to go so what you stoppin him for
Not even I could ignore bein alone it's hard
Find heaven in yourself and God
Common- "Ghetto Heaven"
I've always liked this verse. Common talks about a sistas struggle to find a man and also find herself in the process. I've thought about this song alot over the last week. I can think of at least 7 different conversations that I've had with some
sistas, all of whom are single and looking for a man. On the surface, these women have everything that you would want in a woman; beauty, intelligence, educated, independent, driven, caring, and committed. But they are struggling to find a good
brutha. They are looking for a brutha who comes without the DRAMA. Yes, some men have some issues (lol) but today I'd like to focus on the women. I'm not speaking of these 7 women but just women in general. What are women doing right and what they are doing wrong to find these men.
There are far more females that read this blog than there are men. Its not my intent to put the men on trial (that blog is coming) but I want to look solely at the sistas. I am concerned. I'm not here to bash. I love my sistas. I just have to call it like I see it. Hopefully, I won't step on any toes in the process. If I step on your toes...then say ouch!!!!
Here are some of the problems that I am seeing...
1. Some women are just too damn picky... I've heard women say that a man has to be __ in height and ___ in weight. His
skin has to be this light or that dark.
Hellooooo. Sistas outnumber us. So, if you want to break your man into a specific category, then you've dwindled your list. I understand that you have to like what you see. But damn...you can't too picky. If so, you'll miss that man that you're looking for b/c he didn't fit in your "box".
2. Many women don't know what they really want from a man.
If you don't know what you want from a man, then how will you know if he has what you're looking for or not? For example, if you believe in making a man wait on sex, then make him wait. Express that to him upfront. He may not like it but he'll respect you for keeping it real with him. Don't say that you want to wait and then give it up at the drop of a dime. That's a mixed message.
3. Some women don't know what a good man looks like.
If you didn't grow up in a household with a good man, then you may have a hard time knowing what a good man looks like. Keep in mind that good men come in all shapes, sizes, and hues. Remember the big dude in Waiting to Exhale (can't remember his name).
4. Where are you looking for a man?
I always joke that you can find a good man in a bookstore. That may or may not be true. I'm a cerebral type cat. I'm a thinker so I'm attracted to women who will challenge me mentally. You know...the type that will give mental orgasms. But that's just me. I think you will have a better chance of finding a man that is closer to your liking if you go somewhere that YOU like to go. If you like clubs, then you'll meet a man at a club. If you like church, then you'll meet him at church. But you HAVE to get out to meet a man. The only man that you'll meet at your house is the mailman and the milkman. LOL
5. Do not settle
This is easier said than done. I talked to my "big sis" who I met when we were in high school. She's got 2 degrees, her own home, no kids, and she's a dimepiece. But she hasn't been on a DATE in a months. She said at one point she had to settle just to get a man. The problem was that she lowered her standards...and settled for a married man. Huh? A married man? Their relationship went on for 2 yrs before she got out of it. That was a lose-lose situation for her. She knew it but chose to settle for something that she knew wasn't good for her. And she had nothing to show for it when the dust settled.
Suggestions for you...
6. Hang on
If you find a good brutha, hang on to him
7. Beware of the Dog
Dogs. Playas. Pimps. Whatever you call em. You SHOULD be able to spot em from a mile away. I don't know the difference between a coral snake and a garter snake...but I know a snake when I see one.
8. Game Plan
You must have a game plan for how you will handle a man. I don't mean that you should run game on him. Even if you could. You should have a plan for what you want from a man. More importantly, you should be able to eloquently present that to him.
9. Know Your Competition
You should know that there is other competition out there for your man. If you want to make him wait for sex, you must understand that your competition won't make him wait. You have no control over that. You need to let a man that you are different from the freaks, tramps, skeezers and skallywags that he deals with on a day-to-day basis.
10. Be Aggressive
Contrary to popular belief, men like women who are aggressive and assertive. You can be both and not be considered a freak or a tramp.
Am I off base with these thoughts? Are sistas doing what they need to be doing? Are some too independent and too stubborn to follow any of this?
Keep in mind that I am not a relationship psychologist...I just play one on tv
Monday, March 31, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Just random thoughts...
C'mon Hilary. If you're gonna tell a lie. The least that you can do is
tell a good lie. You were under fire? Really? I've never been shot at but if ever were...I think I'd remember it
Dude on tv said that "it appears that we're headed for a recession." I've got news for you homeboy...we're IN a recession right
The former governor of NY sure was dumb. He paid 5000 grand for some P? I guess he never heard the saying that "the P is free but the drugs cost money."
The new governor of NY has put all of his business on the table. "Yeah, I did coke, weed, and I cheated on my ole lady. Now whut, punk?" LOL
Kwame Kilpatrick...damn playboy! You're gonna have to string up those gators even tighter to fight THIS battle.
Chelsea Clinton please go home. You're not built to handle the media. You know damn well that yo daddy hasn't even kissed yo momma in years. He still got Monica on speed dial.
Tavis Smiley...your disdain for Obama is unreal. After hearing you talk about the man, I thought that YOU were gonna call HIM the N-word. Wow! Wake up, son.
Do prisoners really enjoy that work release thing where they have to pick up trash along the road?
Would it be inappropriate if I dumped my trash on purpose to make them pick it up?
The next time that you're on the phone with a friend or a relative...ask them "hey...why are you breathing so hard?" I guarantee that you'll laugh at their response.
Why are there SOOOOO many single sistas out there?
Why are some of those sistas the pickiest women who you'd ever wanna meet?
Please don't buy a 70k car before you buy a house.
Women's clothes (blue jeans, shoes) are soooo damn expensive...but they look nice
Word on the street is that Reggie Bush has knocked up Kim Kardashian. Say it ain't so Reg? You can't be that dumb...or maybe you are.
Superhead is getting her own reality show. **crickets**
Why would a parent spend $200 on some jeans for a kid but they kid doesn't own a suit?
I look fly in a suit and tie.
Crack is wack
I miss The Wire.
I never understood the whole delegates and electoral college thing until THIS YEAR
If you're single and are looking for a man...go to a bookstore
If you're single and are looking for a woman...go to a mall.
I've never had a manicure before but I'm thinking about it.
There's nothing wrong with a dude going to the spa.
If you're single and are looking for a man...go to the gym
If you're single and are looking for a woman...go to a church.
Sanaa Lathan is fly. I love she. (yes I said she)
The Boondocks are the shyt! Just saw the last ep. Now I have to wait another year.
What is better than graduating from an HBCU?
Only a few more months of this Bushit
4000 unnecessary deaths in Iraq (*sigh*). Pray for em y'all
I have a first cousin who is 38. She's in Iraq. And she has 8 kids!!! Why would you send a mother of 8 kids to Iraq?
Why does my cousin have 8 kids? This aint the 40s
The death toll in Iraq is higher than 4000. Beleee dat!
People wanna see D'Angelo and Lauryn Hill comeback. I don't have one friend who doesn't have The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill
TI only got a year in prison. Whew! He was facing 25. He may wanna get some steroids or something b/c he's a frail dude. He's gonna need to be strong to keep dudes from trying him in the joint
I saw Aretha Franklin on tv the other day...dayyyyyyum!!!
My ncaa brackets suck.
What we do without our mothers?
I forgot that Mothers Day is around the corner. I need to put that order of flowers in RIGHT NOW before I forget
Isn't it cool when you find an old friend that you haven't talked to in years?
I still love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
Somebody reading this right now has a crush on ole 12kyle aka the chocolate boy wonder. It's cool. I see you. Blog crushes are cool
I love black people.
Have you ever seen Craig Mack and Busta Rhymes in the same place at the same time?
Bin Laden runs a bodega in Brooklyn. My cousin SAW him in there. Just in case the gov't was wondering.
I hate pollen
Why is the weather nice all week and then it rains on the weekend? That's not cool. Shouldn't there be a law against that? LOL
Biggie is better than 2Pac. Yeah...I said it.
If you have a co-worker that you don't like, leave them a glass of water on their desk. It'll freak em out.
Today...ask somebody that you know this question... "Have you ever been beat up before?" If they pause before answering the question...they probably have been beaten up before. LMAO!! Do it. You'll get a kick out of it.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Sometimes you have to know when its over. Knowing is half the battle. As a person, you can let foolish pride set in. But in the end, you should be the first person to know when it's time for you to quit. My friends know that one of my favorite athletes of all time is Micheal Jordan. MJ is my dude. When he retired (for the second time), he had just won his 6th championship and had cemented his legacy as arguably the greatest basketball player to ever put on a pair of sneakers. But after he retired, he decided to make a comeback. Bad move. He was nothing like the old Jordan. In fact, that's what he looked like...an old Jordan. Not a good look for him.
One of my favorite r&b groups is making a comeback...New Edition. I saw them in concert here about 2 years ago and they put on one of the best shows that I've ever seen. I used to tell my pops that New Edition was like my generations' version of the Temptations. He's a huge fan of the Temps. I don't know if the Temps went away to ever have to make an official comeback. But NE is coming back. And they're bringing the King of R&B, Bobby Brown (lol) with them. I wish them well and I'll support the new cd.
On the other hand...some folk need to just let it go. Shut it down. Close up shop. One of the first people that come to mind is Michael Jackson. Word on the street is that Jacko is planning a comeback album. *crickets*
Jacko's time has come and gone. Long gone. He just needs to get the animals together and chill out somewhere.
What's your take? Give me a person/group or 2 who needs to make a comeback in music/entertainment or sports. And also give me a person/group or 2 who needs to call it quits. For those of you who think Hammer should make a comeback...I promise I won't laugh. Haaaaa
btw...i borrowed this title from my girl -1-. I hope she don't mind.
"An adolescent mind is so impressionable in those stages
But parents got to parent their kids to keep them out of cages
Cell therapists beware of this lugie that I spit
Incarceration without rehabilitation really don't mean shit"- Big Boi
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I saw the football coming towards me. I could tell that the ball was gonna be very close to the ground. In order to make the catch, I'd have to get my hands between the ground and the ball. Too late! I misjudged it. The ball hit the ground and ricocheted off my hand. Incomplete pass. No big deal. I walked back to the huddle to join the rest of my college teammates. For some reason, I felt a sharp pain in my right hand. It felt like my hand was burning. It felt like I had been stuck with a needle. I looked down and the top half of my pinky finger on my right hand was bent in one direction while the bottom half was going in another direction. Damn! It was dislocated. It looked nasty too. I walked over to the trainer to see if he could "pop" it back into place. No luck. I had to go to the hospital to get it fixed. Damn! Wanna take a guess who threw the ball to me??? Yep. Rezidl! LOL. I'm not saying it was his fault. Actually...it was his fault but it's all good. My finger is still not straight like the rest of my other fingers but it was a freak accident.
I started thinking about it after reading about the freak accident that happened to Denver Broncos wide receiver Brandon Marshall. Marshall was injured as a result of horseplay with family members and a misplaced McDonald's bag. Marshall slipped on the bag and put his right arm through a home entertainment center. He sustained right forearm lacerations to one artery, one vein, one nerve, two tendons and three muscles. He had surgery and will be out of action for 4 months. Are you serious? A McDonald's bag? You got hurt b/c of that? That's a freak accident. I thought mine was strange. I was just trying to catch a routine pass but it hit the ground...bounced off my finger and dislocated it. This dude had to go under the knife b/c of a fast-food bag.
Have you ever been injured playing a sport? Or maybe you've been injured by doing something physical? Pulled a muscle by lifting something? Fallen down a flight of stairs? I wanna hear about your accidents or freak accidents that you've had or have seen.
Each day's another chance to do the things I could've
Done the day before, but I didn't and I known I should've
So I say a prayer for the gone for gooders
Who left this world, then kiss my girl "good mornin', shuga"
Phonte (Little Brother)
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
I got this email from my boy Mike P yesterday...
Okay, check THIS scenario.
I'm walking out of WaMu (Washington Mutual Bank) up here and there is an older white lady standing in the doorway holding the door open yelling back into the store.
She yells, "I'm talking to that black n****r behind the counter. She's in the wrong...that black b*tch."
She said it loud as hell. Now I'm utterly confused at this point as to how to react.
I've handled my business before when I'M confronted with racism, but how deep do I get into it, when it is not directed exactly to me? I'm not even gonna front, I stopped in the doorway for a hot second, ice grilled her husband who was trying to get her out of the bank and then I just bounced. How would you handle that situation?
My initial advice to Mike P was to "put his PIMP hand down on both her and her punk azz husband." But if I would have hit her it would've been trouble for me. A black man slappin a lil white lady? In the South? Ohhhh hell no!!! I would've caught a case for attempted murder and they would've tied me to the bodies that Marlo left in those row houses (The Wire...inside joke...lol)
So what would YOU have done? Do you let it ride? Do you keep it real? Do you confront the punk azz hubby? If it had been a sista yelling the same thing...would you have even cared??? This isn't a diss on white folk. I'm about my people. Period.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
quirk- a peculiarity of action, behavior, or personality; mannerism
The food has been heated in the microwave. I take it out the microwave. I put the plate on the table...but I can't eat JUST yet. I stroll over to the magazine rack and grab something to read. I take the plate and put it on the floor. Then, I put the magazine on the floor. Now it's time to eat. I lay flat on my stomach and begin to eat. Laying down to eat? Nobody does that. While it's probably not the most healthy thing for your digestive system but it's one of my quirks. We all have our quirks. Some are good and some are bad. I like to eat food while laying on the floor. It drives my wife crazy but hey...its me. I've been doing this since I was in the 7th grade. I don't eat every meal on the floor. LOL. Just at least once a day I have to do it. And it's always in front of the tv.
I always read something when I eat. That's another quirk. When I was 8 yrs old, my dad made me read the newspaper every day. I usually read it when I ate breakfast. Since then, it's been a habit to read something while eating. I don't know why I do it...I just do it. Those are a few quirks that I have. I KNOW that I'm not the only one who has some quirks about them.
Give me a quirk or two...
Friday, March 21, 2008
A recent conversation between me and Kameron, my 5 year old son...
Kameron- "Daddy, when you were a kid...did you watch SpongeBob on tv?"
Me-"No, Kameron. SpongeBob didn't come on tv when I was a kid. SpongeBob isn't really a cartoon."
Kameron- "Yes it is."
Me- "Not really. It's not like the Superfriends or Scooby Doo. Those were real cartoons."
Kameron- "I don't like Scooby Doo. It's not better than SpongeBob." He looks at me and walks out of the room. Damn! This kid acts JUST like me. He gets the last word in...then he leaves.
Today's topic...your Top 5 Cartoons of All Time
Here's mine (in no particular order)
1. Flintstones (still tryna figure out how Wilma got pregnant but she slept in a separate bed from Fred)
2. Bugs Bunny
3. Fat Albert
4. Tom and Jerry
Gimme your Top 5 (or 10 b/c I know somebody is NOT gonna stick to tha format...lol)
Have a good weekend! Check back into the Planet over the weekend b/c I will have a Off Tha Dome post
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Every great pilot needs a good wingman. Nooooo, I'm not talking about navigating an aircraft. I'm talking about being that wingman for your friend who is trying to talk to a woman/man. Your job as the wingman is to "occupy" their friend. As a wingman, you occupy that person's friend by engaging in conversation. Your job is to make sure that their friend doesn't "get in the way of your friend" getting a phone number, date, or more...
One of my favorite wingman stories was when my boy Charles called me to be his wingman one night. I told him that I'd do it. The only question that I had for him..."how does she look?" It's not that I wanted to be with her. I just wanted know if she was cute or not. He said that he didn't know. As we were on our way to see the chick (Tonya), Charles reveals to me that this will be the first time that he has seen this chick. That's problem #1. I asked him how long had he known her and he said that he knew her for a few weeks. They met on the Internet. That's problem # 2. By this time, I'm feeling really uneasy about what's about to take place. Too late to back out b/c we had arrived at Tonya's apartment. She lived with her cousin, Morgan. I was supposed to be Charles' wingman for some random chick who's cousin he's never met before??? It didn't sound good. We met Morgan at the door. She was nice but she was much bigger than what I like. And she wasn't really that attractive either. I'm thinking..."this is horrible. I'm gonna have to be the wingman for a big, unattractive chick?" I could kill Charles. After we got settled in her apartment, Tonya comes out. She looked better than Morgan but she wasn't Sanaa Lathan. I could tell that Charles liked what he saw in Tonya. They went into another room to talk. Leaving me to talk to Morgan. I made the most of it for about 45 mins (felt like 4 hrs). I could tell that Morgan was feeling me but I tried to keep my eyes focused on the NBA game that was on tv. The night ended with me getting buzz on my pager. I told Charles that we had to leave b/c...we had to leave. LOL. In the end, I didn't choke Charles for making me be the wingman for THAT chick. Me and Charles still laugh about that story every now and then.
What's your wingman story? Who's your wingman? Do you have that girl who will occupy a guy that you're trying to talk to. Or do you have a reverse wingman? The reverse wingman is your friend who INTERRUPTS some guy from talking to you. Or the friend who will pull you away from that guy who you're not feeling but he's bought you 5 drinks. Give me your wingman story...
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
It's Wednesday. Today's theme is sports related.
Some people hold athletes in high regard. Some people ADORE athletes. Some people think that athletes are pompous and arrogant. Some people think that athletes are vastly overpaid.
As a former athlete, I can say that all of the statements above can be true and false. Athletes are just regular people who excel in a particular field. Nothing more...nothing less. I don't subscribe to the thought that athletes are overpaid. I mean, if somebody wants to pay you 2 million dollars just to stand around and do nothing, then that's cool. I guess you're not really overpaid if somebody is willing to pay you, right? And I know that teachers, police and firefighters should get more money. But honestly, you're not gonna pay $100 to sit in a classroom and watch Mrs. Jones show her fifth grade class how to do "long division." But you'd pay $100 to go to see LeBron James play a basketball game for 3 hrs. LOL. It is what it is. Furthermore, athletes are cool to hang out with.
Today, we're gonna flip the script a lil bit. I want you to list the top 3 athletes that you would like to go out on a date with. Then, I want you to list the top 3 athletes who you WOULDN'T go out on a date with. And this can be based on your perceptions about the athlete. Here's mine..
WOULD LIKE TO DATE...
1. Laila Ali (boxer) she's soooo fine
2. Marion Jones (track) very cute. nice body. We'd have to date once she got outta jail. lol
3 Lisa Leslie (wnba) a b-ball player who models on the side
Would NOT Date
1. Venus Williams (tennis) looks manly. looks JUST like her dad...and that ain't cool
2. Serena Williams (tennis) rumors that she has issues with "personal hygiene". if you know what I mean. that's definitely not ladylike
3. Michelle Wie (golf) she has a HUGE head.
The floor is yourzzzz.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
It's getting warm here. I like that. I am beginning to notice the green starting to come back in the grass in my yard. That means that pretty soon...I'll have to cut the grass. I don't like that. LOL. It's not that I don't like cutting the grass but my yard is HUGE. And my house sits on a hill. For me, pushing a lawn mower is time consuming. Last year, I paid for somebody to cut it. This year, with these high gas prices and budget concerns, I'll do it myself. After surveying the yard, I went to my garage to look at the ole lawn mower. It was GONE! Did somebody steal it? No. I forgot that I let my father-in-law borrow it last summer. I didn't use it and I didn't mind if he used it. I just realized that he never brought it back.
I'm real cool with my father-in-law. I've borrowed things from him and vice versa. I'm going to call him and ask him to return the lawn mower. I don't think it'll be a problem...after all...it's mine, right? But I'm not going to his crib to pick it up, either. If you borrow something, then you should return it. He lives about 5 mins away but I'm not gonna get my SUV dirty with a lawn mover in the trunk. haaaaa. This will be easy...I'll ask him and he'll bring it back. Who knows...we may even share it this summer.
Today's topic...borrowing other people's stuff. Have you ever borrowed something from somebody and they had it for sooooo long that you had to "borrow" it back from them? LOL. Has somebody ever borrowed something from you and damaged it while they had it. I remember when my teammate from college borrowed my Dogg Pound cd and never gave it back...even when I went to his house in DC...(aint that right Rezidl...lmao)? Or when my boy Moe "borrowed" my Syracuse sweatpants when we were in college and "made a pair of shorts" out of them. And THEN he had the nerve to try to give em back to me (no thanks). LOL.
Let me know your story.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
"maybe it's just me but i probably should pay attention to these tornado warnings that they are showing on tv. growing up in s carolina, i was so used to them that it doesn't have the same effect. i've never seen a tornado...and i don't plan on seeing one. tornados rarely strike heavily populated metro areas. i'm buggin at how a tornado warning can dominate the first 20 mins of a local newscast"
Those were my words. A week ago. I don't feel that way anymore. As many of you know, a devastating tornado ripped threw downtown Atlanta, Ga on Friday night. Many of you have seen the destruction that was left behind. While it may have only lasted 1 minute, it has caused damage of an estimated 250 million dollaz. What many of you don't know...I was almost in the middle of it. I don't live downtown but that's where I love to hang out. On Friday night, I had tickets to see the Atlanta Hawks play the LA Clippers. I was going to go to the game. But late Friday afternoon, I started feeling funny. I felt tired all of a sudden. And something told me to stay at the crib. What? Stay at the crib on a Friday night and miss the Hawks game? Are you crazy? Those were my thoughts. But something told me that I'd be better off at the crib. I had no idea that bad weather was headed our way. I didn't even know that it was gonna rain. You know bruthas don't go out when its raining. LOL
The pictures that you see above are from the area around the CNN Center, Centennial Olympic Park, Ga Dome (where the SEC was holding its conference b-ball tournament), and Phillps Arena (where I would have been for the Hawks game). At the time that this tornado struck would have been about the SAME time that I would have been leaving the Hawks game. Can you imagine walking out to your car and finding a billboard laying on top of it? Luckily, I listened to the voice of reason and stayed at home.
Thank you for call the calls, emails, and text msgs. Me and the fam are fine. The 12estate was spared. LOL
Posted by 12kyle at 4:47 PM
Friday, March 14, 2008
I'm thirsty. I stroll over to the fridge to get something to drink. After opening it, I realize that all of the Gatorade (the drink of champions) is gone. There's no more orange juice. The only thing that's in there is some wine (don't need any of that b/c it'll make me sleepy) and some soy milk. I don't drink soy milk. I probably should get a glass of water and call it a night. Awww...whut the hell? I'll try some soy milk. I don't know why the wife drinks this stuff but I may as well try it. I tried it. It was horrible. I should've stuck with the water. I guess it's an acquired taste b/c it was the worst thing that I've ever drank.
Nevertheless, it got me to thinking. I thought about the worst things that have occurred. We all remember the good...what about the worst. Here's my list...
the worst drink = soy milk
the worst taste (food) = beets (yuk)
the worst smell (food) = chitlins (I'd rather smell my son's diaper than a room where chitlins have been cooked
the worst movie that I've seen = Lenard Part 6 (starring Bill Cosby) damn! I'll never get that hour and 30 mins of my life back.
the worst date that I've had = I was in hs. I took a chick to the hotel. I went outside to my car to get the radio so that we could have some mood music. The radio was in the trunk. I picked up the radio but locked the damn keys in the trunk. I couldn't call home b/c I didn't want my mom to know where I was. Shyt!
the worst person who I've been around = my position coach in college. a true idiot. he couldn't coach his way outta a wet paperbag with a chainsaw in his hands.
the worst experience = pregnancy scare (lol)
the worst feeling = puking (2nd runner up- puking with nothing on your stomach)
the worst car = Toyota Cressida (it died a thousand deaths in the 2 months that I had it)
the worst job = telemarketer for a manufacturing buying service. I would come home for lunch every day and think of a way to get myself fired so that I could get an unemployment check. It was cold calls. I've never been hung up on that many times in my life. LOL
These are a few of my worst episodes. You don't have to use the same ones that I did. Just vibe on what ever you want.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
I'm from where the hammer's rung, News cameras never come
You and your man houndin' every verse in your rhyme
where the grams is slung, nuggas vanish every summer
Where the blue vans would come, we throw the work in the can and run
Where the plans was to get funds and skate off the set
To achieve this goal quicker, sold all my weight wet
Faced with immeasurable odds still I get straight bets
So I felt some more something and you nothing check
I from the other side with other guys don't walk to much
And girls in the projects wouldn't f#ck us if we talked too much
So they ran up town and sought them dudes to trust
I don't know what the fuck they thought, those nuggas is foul just like us
I'm from where the beef is inevitable, Summertime's unforgetable
Boosters in abundance, buy a half-price sweater new
Your world was everything, So everything you said you'd do
You did it, Couldn't talk about it if you ain't lived it
I from where nuggas pull your car, and argue all day about
Who's the best MC's, Biggie, Jay-Z, and Nas
Where the drugs czars evolve, and thugs always are
At each other's throats for the love of foreign cars
Where cats catch cases, hoping the judge R and R's
But most times find themselves locked up behind bars
I'm from where they ball and breed rhyme stars
I'm from Marcy son, just thought I'd remind y'all
"Where I'm From"
As I was driving home from last nights disappointing game between the Hawks and the Rockets (yeah...I actually thought that we'd win), I was thinking about what I wanted to blog on. Then, this song came on. This is one of my favorite songs from Jay Z's second cd. In the song, he tells you distinctly and descriptively where he's from (Marcy Projects...Brooklyn, NY). I've never been to Marcy. But through this rhyme...I have.
There are a lotta people who read this blog and participate each day on the blog. Their profiles may say what city they are in but I'd like to dig a little deeper today. Tell me about where you're from. What do you like about where you're from? What don't you like about it? And if you wanna throw in a statistic about it...do it!
WHERE I'M FROM- Florence, South Carolina
Likes- great place to raise kids, it has a "down home feel" for a small town, it'll always be home
Dislikes- very little social and economic development, people stay locked in the "small town mentality" and aren't willing to break out of it.
Stat- Florence is at the intersection of I-95 and I-20, approximately halfway between New York City and Miami, Florida.
Where are YOU from???
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
The NCAA is a bunch of pimps. Yeah, I said it. And I'll say it again. They are pimps.
This time next week you or somebody that you know will be filling out their NCAA Basketball Tournament Brackets. There may be an office pool in your office so that people can gamble to see who may come away with the earnings by being the person who can correctly guess the most teams that will be left standing at the end of the tournament. The NCAA doesn't "encourage" gambling. They probably don't encourage it because they can't pimp that.
The Division I Men's Basketball tournament is the only NCAA championship tournament (officially, the BCS Football Championship is not an NCAA event) where the NCAA does not keep the profits. Instead, the money from the multi-billion-dollar television contract is divided among the Division I basketball playing schools and conferences as follows:
- 1/6 of the money goes directly to the schools based on how many sports they play (one "share" for each sport starting with 14, which is the minimum needed for Division I membership).
- 1/3 of the money goes directly to the schools based on how many scholarships they give out (one share for each of the first 50, two for each of the next 50, ten for each of the next 50, and 20 for each scholarship above 150).
- 1/2 of the money goes to the conferences based on how well they did in the six previous men's basketball tournaments (counting each year separately, one share for each team getting in, and one share for each win except in the Play-in game and the Final Four). In 2007, based on the 2001 through 2006 tournaments, the Big East received over $14.85 million, while the eight conferences that did not win a first-round game in those six years received slightly more than $1 million each.
That word student athlete is one of the biggest misconceptions in the world. Especially when you consider that most athletes train year around. They can't work and be paid during their "off-season". You are an athletic student. Most coaches aren't worried about you getting your education...they are merely worried about you remaining eligible to compete in your sport. That's it. As long as the athlete is eligible to play and compete, the better the chances are that they'll team will be successful and playing for a championship. Its the pimp game at its finest. The athletes do most of the work but everybody else reaps the benefits.
As some of you may know, I played college football for 4 yrs. I played at South Carolina State University...a historically black college in Orangeburg, SC. We won a black college national championship when I was playing. Even my school has benefited financially off the success that we had. I'm not some old washed up bitter athlete. I'm just calling it the way that I see it. I think that athletes SHOULD be paid to play. BOTTOM LINE! As you can see, there is a lotta money floating around but the kids should get some money. If you're gonna pimp me, the least that you can do would be to compensate me for a job well done.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
NEW YORK - This is a triumphant time for black women: Condoleezza Rice in the global diplomatic spotlight, Michelle Obama captivating campaign crowds as a potential first lady, billionaire Oprah Winfrey playing political kingmaker.
It's also a traumatic time: Rutgers University basketball players disparaged by radio host Don Imus, a black woman kidnapped and tortured by whites in West Virginia, the home-owning dreams of black women disproportionately dashed by foreclosures.
That remarkable mix is the focus of this year's State of Black America report, issued Wednesday by the National Urban League. It features essays looking at the array of challenges faced by African-American women: economic, social, psychological and medical.
"The one thing that is certain is the need to hear and amplify the voices of black women," longtime civil rights activist Dorothy Height writes in the foreword. "Too often, our needs, concerns, struggles, and triumphs are diminished and subordinated to what is believed to be the more pressing concerns of others."
Julianne Malveaux, the president of Bennett College for Women in Greensboro, N.C., contends in the report's opening essay that the image of black women in popular culture has barely improved in the year since the Imus incident.
White men continue to dominate on TV's Sunday morning news shows, she writes, while "the gyrating, undulating image of African-American women in rap music videos and, by extension, on cable television is as prevalent as ever."
The report delves deeply into economics, noting that black women are more likely than white or Hispanic women to be running a household and raising children on their own. According to Malveaux, black women hold more jobs nationwide than black men, yet — despite their breadwinner roles — earn less on average, $566 a week compared to $629 for black men.
In an essay about the home loan crisis, Andrea Harris, president of the North Carolina Institute for Minority Economic Development, suggests that black women have suffered disproportionately. Assessing recent federal data on subprime loans, which are a main culprit in the foreclosure epidemic, Harris says black women received far more of these loans in 2006 than white men.
“It is easy to imagine the devastation that is headed toward African-American women and their communities,” Harris writes.
An essay by Dr. Doris Browne, a public health expert, details the above-average rates of cancer, diabetes and heart disease among black women.
On an upbeat note, former Labor Secretary Alexis Herman notes in her essay that black women are making huge strides as entrepreneurs. The number of businesses owned by them increased by 147 percent between 1997 and 2006, compared to an overall business growth rate of 24 percent, she wrote.
Another of the essayists, Melanie Campbell of the National Coalition on Black Civic Participation, said in an interview that disparities in health care and economics are the paramount issues for black women as the election campaign unfolds.
Exit polling shows that black women have become a larger force within the Democratic electorate compared to 2004, and Campbell said their expectations for policy changes also are rising.
“We want to go beyond being thought about,” she said. “We want action.”
The president of the Urban League, a 98-year-old black empowerment organization, hailed women as “the backbone of the black family” — constantly surmounting obstacles. Marc Morial called for expansion of programs that would assist black women in starting businesses, protect more of them from predatory lending schemes, and provide more of them with affordable, high-quality child care.
“When black women hurt, the American family suffers,” Morial wrote. “But by uplifting black women, especially those struggling hardest to keep their families together and their dreams on track, we lift up every American community.”
A year ago, the Urban League focused its State of Black America report on the difficulties facing many young black men, including their high rates of crime and imprisonment. This year’s theme was welcomed by black women who believe their particular concerns often are overlooked.
“I’m heartened that we’re delving into this issue in depth in a way that we haven’t in the past,” said Avis Jones-DeWeever, a public policy expert with the National Council of Negro Women.
“For us, it’s two steps forward, one step back,” she added. “But we do have a lot to be proud of.”
According to the statistics, times are very hard for us as people. And times are even harder for sistas. What do you think are some of the most pressing issues for sistas? How have you dealt with your own issues? What can bruthas do to help you?
Monday, March 10, 2008
The Wire is over.
For 5 seasons they gave me everything they had. And I watched every episode. The final episode,-30-, aired last night. As I watched each scene on the edge of my seat, I thought "this is playing real slow." I thought they were setting up for some final resolution. How were they gonna close this series out? McNulty's secret was out of the bag and he was definitely headed to jail...or death. We knew from the previews that Marlo was gonna get back on the streets. So how was it gonna end. I KNEW it wasn't gonna end like the Sopranos with a damn blacked out screen. Less anti-climatic but great tv, nonetheless.
1. Gus exposes Templeton for who he truly was. Much like a real life Jason Blair, Templeton's propensity to lie. The problem was that Gus' superiors didn't think that he was lying and felt that Gus had made it a personal issue. In the end, Gus gets demoted and Templeton and the Baltimore Sun get the much coveted Pulitzer Prize. I enjoyed the media angle of The Wire this season b/c it exposed how stories can easily be altered. As Gus said..."we are here to report the story and not to make them up.
2. Daniels refuses to play hardball and ultimately has to step down. He goes into practicing law.
3. Carcetti becomes the Governor of Md and Noreese becomes the Mayor of Baltimore. I can remember how Carcetti came into office trying to be a clean politician. Well, there's no such thing. By the end, he had done so many dirty deals just so that he could climb his way to the top. In the end, we saw that aspect very clear. Everybody was gonna do what they could do to get ahead...to hell with everybody else.
4. Dukie becomes a junkie. We saw this coming. He went from borrowing money from Prezbo to shooting up with Sanford and Son (lol). In a sad twist of fate, the streets lose a fiend like Bubbles and gains one in Dukie. That is a part of the life cycle in the streets.
5. Kenard gets arrested for killing Omar. Haaaaaa
6. McNulty lives! I thought for sure that somebody would kill him or he'd kill himself for what he did. The police force had his "funeral" but you McNulty's case is not resolved...yet!
7. Lester retires. I always liked Lester.
8. Micheal does not leave Baltimore. I thought that he'd be smart enough to get outta town. NOT! Instead, he sticks up some drug dealers who work for Marlo. Bad move Mike. To make matters worse, he shoots him in the knee. Once again, the life cycle in the streets. Remember when Michael was a good kid who wanted nothing to do with Marlo and his crew. Now he is a YOUNG Omar.
9. Speaking of Marlo...Levy is able to get Marlo out b/c he knew that there was an "illegal wire tap" on his cell phone. Levy is a slimy lawyer. But he's good. Damn good. He knew that he could play hardball with the law b/c he knew that they had done something wrong. In turn, they found out about his "source" within the court system and had threatened him with jail time. Once again, here's where The Wire excels. It shows how shady deals get worked out behind closed doors. They had just announced that Marlo was in jail and that they had 16 mill in dope but yet he walks. That's why The Wire is the shyt. In his final scene, Marlo strolls up on a corner in a suit. He approaches 2 corner boys who are talking about Omar. Words are exchanged. Marlo punches the kid and they run off. The kid fires his gun before Marlo swung on him. Marlo doesn't realize until the kids had run off the block that the he had been shot in the forearm. He looked at his suit and saw the blood. Although he had sold the connect for 10 mill and headed for "retirement"...here he was fighting on the block...just to protect his name. As he said last week... "my name is my name." And the scene ends with him on the corner just standing there.
10. Chris gets life without parole. Ironically, he's locked up in the same jail as Weebay
11. Cheeze gets out...only to get shot in the head by Slim Charles. He said that he did it for Prop Joe. Cheeze was Joe's nephew who set him up to be killed by Marlo. Isn't it ironic that The Wire started out with Barksdale being the kingpin but the Co-Op is now being run by a former Barksdale lieutenant?
12. Bubbles gets to come upstairs in his sisters house. LOL
In the end, the last episode was cool with me. There may be some people who didn't like it. Or just some (like me) who don't like that there won't be another season. There are many rumors that there may be a movie in the works. I would support that. In the end, there weren't a whole lotta resolutions...but isn't that the way it's supposed to be?
Saturday, March 8, 2008
random thoughts off the dome...
why is gas so damn high? i have an SUV. i might start stealing gas if it gets worse. lol. it could be worse. i could be living in LA like my boy Weja. i know it's even higher out there
i'll be glad when the summer gets here. it was 73 degrees one day and 43 degrees 2 days later. i hate that.
maybe it's just me but i probably should pay attention to these tornado warnings that they are showing on tv. growing up in s carolina, i was so used to them that it doesn't have the same effect. i've never seen a tornado...and i don't plan on seeing one. tornados rarely strike heavily populated metro areas. i'm buggin at how a tornado warning can dominate the first 20 mins of a local newscast
speaking of weather, if we ever got 6 inches of snow here...its a wrap. five million people in this city and there's no snow trucks! that makes no sense to me. if there is a threat of snow, they'll throw dirt on the ground and keep it movin. and everybody will run to grocery stores and buy all the bread that's on the shelf.
wonder how many fools still have shyt from the Y2K scare? you know...the fools who stored food and supplies b/c they thought that the world was coming to an end as we moved from 1999 to 2000
dec 31,1999...i got engaged that night...maybe i thought the world was coming to an end, too. lmao. "the world is ending...here girl, take this ring."
lil sis just went over. she's a delta now. i'm proud of her. she'd better stay in college for as long as she can. don't be in hurry to rush into this crazy world.
college dayz- neva been so broke but had so much fun. i got money now and life is fun but it ain't the same. i miss those days.
i'd go back to college tomorrow if i could but i wouldn't want to do any of the work. lol
blog crushes are funny. somebody reading this post right now has a blog crush on 12kyle. it's cool. trust me. its okay. i'm flattered. lol
speaking of blogs...don and e (eclectik) are like my blog supaheroz. don will make one post and get 70 responses by the end of the day. don is a internet pimp. i'm convinced. e's blog is unreal. that dude is on some next level shyt.
eb the celeb...thanks for the shout out in your rhyme. you are a much betta lyricist than foxy, lil kim, and remy ma. and you can tell em i said that. no more aggie jokes from me...for now. lol
last point on the blogs...for some reason...some of the blogs that i read and respond to...i feel like i know these people but i don't know em. there's a connection there and i like that. y'all are mad cool. hope you feel like you know me. if you don't, you will very soon.
can somebody tell me when tribe called quest is gonna drop anutha cd? damn! it's been a loong time!
can't wait for the roots to drop. those dudes are the shyt!
i think i'ma go to the mall today. i'm not gonna buy anything. i'm gonna just watch people.
sometimes i have the urge to literally kick these kids in their ass when i see them with their pants falling off their ass. where are the parents who buy their clothes
nothing stranger than seeing upper middle class black kids tryna be "thugs". you live in a 800k home...your parents household income exceeds 400k...you go to private school and you're walking around with a doorag in your back pocket with pants falling off your ass? something is wrong with that picture.
find something to laugh at every day
a week ago, a former college classmate of mine committed suicide. i didn't know her that well. she was pleasant the few times that our paths crossed in college. everybody liked her. on the surface, she had the things that we all think are important...a husband, house, good job...etc. but she left it all behind. don't know why? we all go through trials and tribulations. some of us handle them better than others. make sure that you take time to listen to those close to you.
i love black people
unwritten man law...if i'm taking a leak at the urinal, don't talk to me. keep your head looking forward or look up at the ceiling. don't look at me or look to see what i'm doing. i'm doing the same damn thing that you're doing...taking a piss
unwritten man law...if you take a piss, wash your hands!!!
off tha dome trivia...in what profession does 85% of the employees sport tattoos? you think you know...but you don't. i'll give the answer on the next post b/c i'm sure that nobody will get it.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Music. We all love it. Personally, I don't know where my life would be without it. There are some songs that motivate you. Some songs will make you sad. And then there are some songs that will MOVE you. When I say MOVE you, I don't mean a song that will make you tap your feet or bob your head. Nor do I mean the song that will make you wave your hands in the air...and wave'em like you just don't care. LOL. Today's vibe is...that joint that will get you on the dance floor!! The song that you will knock folk OVER on your way to the dance floor. And for those who are wondering...yes...I can dance.
My song is "Shake What Ya Momma Gave Ya" by Poison Clan. If you've never heard it before...I'm surprised. The song came out when I was in college in the early 90s. There's nothing special about the lyrics (kinda nasty and misogynistic) and the beat was that "Miami Bass" that was popular back then. But when it came on at a party, I was on the dance floor! And I will say that I've "sweat-ed out many perms on that song alone." And if you don't believe me then you can come to Atlanta and I'll sweat your perm out on that song! LOL.
What's the song that you have to dance to. Let's have some fun with this...
Thursday, March 6, 2008
As we discuss topics here at the 12th Planet, we know that this is a place where folks can stuff off their chest. All topics can be discussed. All opinions are golden. I have always expressed to the inhabitants of the 12th Planet that if they have any subject matter that they would like to be used as a topic that they can always email me (firstname.lastname@example.org) and I'll post it. If you don't want me to put your name out there, then I can do it anonymously.
Today's topic comes from a female reader named In-vent-her. Here's what she had to say...
There are many different forms of the lifestyle, such as voyeurism, exhibitionism, full swap, threesomes, etc.
With places similar to Hedonism resorts popping up all over the Carribean, would you consider taking a walk on the wild side or have you done so already? Have you and your mate ever discussed the subject of bringing in another person into your bedroom? Thanks 12kyle
When I read it, I didn't know if there were many readers who participated in that lifestyle. But hey...this is 2008. Some women love women and some men love men. I don't knock ya hustle. Do what you do!
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Today is Wednesday. Every Wednesdays blog will be devoted to sports. Today's vibe..."At least OJ didn't do it." (inspired by the column written on ESPN.com by writer Scoop Jackson on 10/18/07)
There's a joke running rampant through the 'hood these days. It's called: "At least Bobby Brown didn't do it." Created by comedian Sheryl Underwood, it plays on the age-old inside joke that, when bad things happen in the news, black people often pray that "one of us" wasn't the one who instigated the crime. And now that O.J. Simpson done did it again, we thought it'd be appropriate to give him the respect due. Why should Bobby Brown get all of the love? So …
The next time a famous baseball player has to testify before Congress and is lying about using performance enhancing drugs. Even though there's a mountain of evidence stacked against him: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that a college running back shows up at the NFL Combine and has the performance of his life...but the topic that everybody keeps talking about is the 2 paternity suits that he is facing BEFORE he has even played one minute in the NFL: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time a legendary college basketball coach quits on his team during the middle of the season and names his son as his successor despite the fact that his son is not ready to be a head coach in college basketball: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that an NBA player gets in a fight in a bar and someone gets stabbed: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that you hear about an athlete being robbed for his expensive jewelry: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that a baseball player punches a fan: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time a basketball icon divorces his wife and has to fork over 150 million: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time a Pro Football Hall of Famer bum-rushes a hotel room with his boys, guns drawn, demanding that the dude selling the sports memorabilia "return his shit," well … that might be OJ...But still...
The next time a NFL player admits to fathering 9 kids from 7 different women...and has to ask his team to give him an advance on his salary so that he doesn't fall behind on child support payments: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that an athlete holds out from playing to re-negotiate their contract so that they can make even more money: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time we hear an athlete say "it's not about the money"...we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time we hear about an athlete whining about not winning an award or wanting to be traded b/c they are unhappy: we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
The next time that a hockey player is inadvertently kicked in the throat by the skating blade of one of his teammates...and then he proceeds to almost bleed to death on the ice in front of thousands of spectators...we can say: "At least O.J. didn't do it."
We know he don't need a skating blade because he's good with a regular knife. LOL
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
New Years Resolutions
When Jan. 1 rolls around, most people have their New Years Resolutions all mapped out. By the time March rolls around, most resolutions have been forgotten. One of the resolutions that most people have is the desire to exercise more than they did before so that they may lead a more healthier life. Well...March is here! Are you exercising like you said that you would????
Not only is it March but spring is right around the corner. It was 73 degrees here in Atlanta yesterday!!! This weekend we'll get more daylight hours as we spring our clocks forward. So, it's time to get serious about exercising...especially if you made a resolution to do so in January. Personally, my body goes through periods when I HAVE to workout...even harder than I normally do. This comes from my days of playing football in college. This is the time of year that we worked out real hard as we prepared for the upcoming season. So, I'm in the gym every day. We all want to look good for the summer, right?
What's the best time to exercise? Some people swear by a 6 a.m. jog to get their hearts racing and get them psyched up for the day. Others wouldn't dream of breaking a sweat before noon, preferring a walk around the neighborhood after dinner. But is any one time of day the best time to exercise?
The truth is that there's no reliable evidence to suggest that calories are burned more efficiently at certain times of day. But the time of day can influence how you feel when exercising.
The most important thing, experts say, is to choose a time of day you can stick with, so that exercise becomes a habit.
What are you doing? Are you exercising? If so, what do you do? And when do you do it?
Monday, March 3, 2008
Snoop: "How my hair look, Mike?"
Mike:"It look good, girl."
Mike shoots Snoop in the head and calmly exits out of the vehicle into the night. Snoop, who had planned to set Mike up and kill him on that same night, was smoked. And I loved it b/c I never liked her character. Both she and Chris were cold blooded killers. And they had taught Mike to become the same. They schooled him and advised him that he needed "to get to the scene early" before taking care of business. Well...her plans backfired as Mike realized that she was plotting to kill him. Before he blasted her, she told him that Marlo thought that he snitched on the crew. He didn't but he knew that he had to kill Snoop. He knows that he's wanted on the streets. He dropped his lil brutha off at his aunt's house. He also distanced himself from his good friend Dukie. The streets are watching. Hopefully, he has enough sense to get outta town.
Lester puts the clocks to work and is able to nab Marlo and all of his goons. The classic scene was when Marlo, Cheese, Monk, and Chris were all locked up together discussing the charges that they faced. Monk "accidentally" tells Marlo about what's being said about him in the streets. When he advises him that Omar, who is now dead, was talking shyt about him...Marlo becomes enraged about how his "name" is being carried on the streets. Little does he know, Omar was calling him all kinds of mfs and punks. LOL. After seeing the previews for the series finale, Marlo ends up back on the street. I'm not sure how it happens. Maybe they get out on the fact that Lester ran an illegal wire on Marlo's cell phone? Whatever the case is...next week can't come any sooner.
Good to see Naymond, the son of Wee Bay and now stepson of Bunny Colvin, doing very well. Also good to see Colvin stiff the mayor. LOL
Gus is about to really find out what kinda skunk Templeton is. I like Gus. He's "scratchin' a itch."
It don't look good for McNulty. I've been saying it for weeks. The previews for next week don't seem to be in his favor either.
Herc has a BIG MOUTH. He's playing both sides of the fence with his boy Carver and Levy.
Keema! She just couldn't keep her damn mouth shut could she? I knew if there would be SOMEBODY who would tell...it'd be her. Damn, Keema. Your big mouth is about to ruin it for errrrybody. McNulty should have known better than to tell her. Some women can't keep secrets (and y'all know I'm right)
Bubbles is clean. Literally and figuratively.
The 90-minute finale of HBO's The Wire won't be available in advance of the March 9 cable channel premiere date, a spokesman for HBO said.
Unlike the way in which the previous nine episodes this season could be seen On Demand starting the Monday before each Sunday airdate, viewers will have to wait to until 9 p.m. March 9 to see how it all ends with the Baltimore-based drama after five seasons.
HBO says the move is being made so that On Demand viewers don't "spoil" the pleasure of those fans who plan to wait until the Sunday-night HBO cablecast.
And you have to admit there was no shortage of On Demand fans -- folks who are quick to pledge their undying love of the series and sense of community with other viewers -- who went online after the death of a certain larger than life villain in episode 8 and blabbed it all over the place.