Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Keep It Real

I got this email from my boy Mike P yesterday...

Okay, check THIS scenario.

I'm walking out of WaMu (Washington Mutual Bank) up here and there is an older white lady standing in the doorway holding the door open yelling back into the store.

She yells, "I'm talking to that black n****r behind the counter. She's in the wrong...that black b*tch."

She said it loud as hell. Now I'm utterly confused at this point as to how to react.

I've handled my business before when I'M confronted with racism, but how deep do I get into it, when it is not directed exactly to me? I'm not even gonna front, I stopped in the doorway for a hot second, ice grilled her husband who was trying to get her out of the bank and then I just bounced. How would you handle that situation?

My initial advice to Mike P was to "put his PIMP hand down on both her and her punk azz husband." But if I would have hit her it would've been trouble for me. A black man slappin a lil white lady? In the South? Ohhhh hell no!!! I would've caught a case for attempted murder and they would've tied me to the bodies that Marlo left in those row houses (The Wire...inside joke...lol)

So what would YOU have done? Do you let it ride? Do you keep it real? Do you confront the punk azz hubby? If it had been a sista yelling the same thing...would you have even cared??? This isn't a diss on white folk. I'm about my people. Period.

Holla bakk.


W Coyote said...

I think letting the thing ride was good. When people are hot and you try to intervene in some way all you do is fire things up more. Who knows what would have happened then? You would have probably come out looking like more of a fool than her.

I don't think comments like she was making get much traction these days even in the South. As it stands she made a fool out of hereself and probably thats what everyone thinks of her too.

I wouldn't have said anything to the hubby either--looks like he was just trying to get out of there alive himself.

Anonymous said...

I probably would've stuck my foot out so she would trip over it.

The old me definitely would've had something to say.

The new me would just laugh it off because that's her issue not mine. It's obviously that she has some hatred. Allowing her hatred to become mine would put me in the same place as her which would mean I have no control over my emotions.

Mizrepresent said...

This is a no-win situation. Nothing your friend could have said that would have helped the matter. I bet on the normal this same lady is the one going around at church talking about "some of my bestfriends are black", then soon as things don't go their way we quickly becomes "n#ggers and b*tches". You reap what you sow...so sista probably handled her bizness inside and lil miss daisy just couldn't deal with a sista handling her BIZNESS! Have a great day!

Brad said...

12Kyle, I gave my thoughts on this yesterday. I think he did the right thing. For one he missed too much of the situation to really know what happened. Me personally i grew up in a time and place where it was pretty much ok to call us out our name. I was called everthing from an "N" to a burnt piece of toast, to an eggplant (in Italian). So, while I definitely don't condone her speak, I think that we have to show restraint in our response to the disrespect.

I think that for every moment that we don't combat ignorance with ignorance we become less ignorant and they become more so. If that makes any sense. I also believe that if someone was able to videotape that lady and play it back for her when she had calmed down...that she would have felt like a complete idiot and an ignorant fool.

Opinionated Diva said...

I think he did the right thing as well. Sometimes you have to keep it moving and just let shyt go.

I would have wanted to accidentally-on-purpose trip her azz and accidentally-on-purpose step on her as she hit the pavement...now that I think about it, the thought alone is enough to make me smile and feel better! lol

12kyle said...

@ W Coyote
You are correct. There's no right or wrong answer here. And I think the bubby was tryna get outta there to save himself, too.

Thanks for coming to the 12th Planet. Come back.

@ Jewells
I think the OLD me would have said something too!

@ Miz
You're right. If she's willing to say that in public, you never know what she'd say behind closed doors

@ Brad

@ Opinionated Diva
"accidentally-on-purpose step on her"...too funny!

Queen of My Castle said...

You never lied when you said that they would have slapped your arse with attempted murder for a measly slap, but if the tables were turned they would just say that it was self defense because she feared for her life. "There was this big Black man standing there and I thought he was going to rob me. He looked like one of those gang bangers" LOL. SMH. I honestly don't know what I would have done.

Brad said...

You never heard that term Mulinion (sp). It's Italian for eggplant. They shorten up to Moolie. I used to work at a supermarket with like 10 Italian dudes. They just called me Moolie all the time. Until they finally told me what the F it meant.

Urban Thought said...

Sometimes you just have to let things go. It wasn't for the person to get involved. Sure you want to put the smack down on folk for even using the world.

My reaction would have been the same no matter who used the word. It takes it to the next level when someone is screaming the n-word out of anger. That isn't something you want to see or experience.

I think one of your other readers said put their foot out... I probably would have done the same. Trip over this and feel the floor hitting your face.

PRO said...

My name would'a been Wes' and I wouldn't have been in that mess. It was best to let the "evil" of White America rear her ugly head (in which case she did)... Solo. poor broad was going to find the nearest Black charity to give a whole lot of "repent" money to feel better about herself. ALl I know is somebody pissed her the fugg-off! Cause you know damn well that was some Black Classic ish all up and through! For once, it wasn't US. It prolly was Hillary cousin and nem though. WaMu bank teller prolly pissed her off, wearing her Obama button, said something to the effect of him being related to US. LMBAO. Whatev'a it was she had a whole lot of years of ni99a-hating in her system. She released that beast...

L. Renee' said...

Your friend did the right thing. It wasn't his battle to fight. Now, if it was addressed to him that would have been different. Some people are just plain ignorant. Even if you friend wasted 5 minutes out of his life to get in her face about using the word "N" I'm almost positive that it wouldn't have made any difference to her. The issue would have been traded off to a Black Man yelling at a Old White Woman. That could have escalated into something very ugly.
on another note...you never heard the term "Moolie"? Didn't you see DO THE RIGHT THING???

L. Renee' said...

Thanks for posting on my blog today. You are very loyal. I like that about you.

Trish said...

Man o man !! I have been in this situation before where you want to do something but have to think first...

I am so glad the brotha thought before he acted, cause we would have been seeing his azz on the
11 o'clock news for slapping a white lady down.
While she acted like a complete bafoon, she would have been portrayed the little innocent caucasian, he would have been THE BIG ANGRY BLACK MAN.
Sometimes you just gotta let it ride.

I would have probably done something more subtle like bumped into her and tried to knock her damn shoulder off her body. lol

Or pulled to door open wider and let her azz fall flat. lol

She probably had no money in the bank while trying to withdraw $500.
Or maybe she was trying to get a check cashed without ID.
what-eva !

You know they cant stand a black COMPETENT woman. Im sure the woman in the bank did exactly what she was supposed to do.

Dont worry brotha she will get hers, you cant do dirt and expect any good to come into your life.

The Jaded NYer said...

my reaction- whether it had been this situation or the reverse- would have been the same:

a shocked/stank side-eye while uttering "Triflin!" loud enough for them to hear.

then I would have invoked the mantra Chris Rock gave us in his song, "No Sex in the Champagne Room,"-- Let It Sliiiiide!!

Your friend did the right thing.

(besides...bank tellers do be gettin' too big for their britches sometimes LOL)

Brown Girl Gumbo said...

Your friend did the right thing. Because I have an outrageous temper, I don't know if I could've kept my mouth closed. I get so heated - especially when I'm witnessing a racist act.

I just wish the "n" word could just be eradicated completely!

12kyle said...

@ Queen
I would've gotten implicated in every unsolved murder within 30 miles of my house. LOL.

It's always kinda hard to think what you'd do until you're in that situation. Hopefully, we'll never have to make that choice.

@ Brad
I have heard that term before. Never has it been directed at me. I've only heard it on tv.

@ Urban Thought

Thanks for coming through to the 12th Planet. Make sure that you come back.

Another vote for trippin the racist witch, huh? LOL

@ Pro
Hilary's cousin and nem? LMAO!!! Good one

@ LRenee
No problem. You know that I'm gonna come thru to your blog errrrrryday. We are family. If it

@ Trish
I'm sure this woman REALLY don't like competent black women. But she's the one with the issue.

@ Jaded NYer
Triflin is a good call. Maybe yell "triflin racist"


@ Brown Girl Gumbo
I feel you. I think Mike P did a good job of keepin his cool

Still_Pocahontaz said...

Wow…that’s not good. I know me ….and I would have HAD to say SOMETHING…but since Im saved, I probably would have said “You know that wasn’t nice, that was very rude and unnecessary, you cannot think that is acceptable….then something like GOD DON’T LIKE UGLY…but then she may have said something rude back to me and probably called me a black b*tch to at which point I would have had to get right up in her face and tell her to Kiss my black ARSE!!!!...LMAO.

PCD (Pretty Circle Drawer) said...

smh, smh, smh all the way in the door and right past her. just a shame!

dejanae said...

im pondering
yes pondering
the fact that she said black nigger
not simply nigger
as if the two words in here mind did not denote the same thing
just something to think about

i woulda gave her the ill grill
and k.i.m.

the ole bag is probably already set in here ways

Eb the Celeb said...

For me it would depend on how old she is... if she was visibly over 60 I would just let it go. My grandmother still calls white people crackers, and old people are just set in their ways. You cant change them... but if she was any younger... as a black female... I would have told her about herself.

12kyle said...

@ Poca
If you would've gotten in her face, then that would have been an opportunity for her to hit you. THEN...you could kick her azz! LOL

It is a shame, ain't it? It's sad but it's important to remember that SHE is the one with the issues...not you.

@ dejanae
She is definitely set in her ways

@ Eb the Celeb
Your grandmother is off the chain. LOL

PrettyBlack said...

First of all he did the right thing. But I noticed how shit is waaay different in the south, a little story:

I was in texas in '04 for my Aunts wedding, Beaumont to be exact. So my mom and I had to go to victoria's secret because I needed a strapless bra for my dress, anywho, a young sister was helping me, hand up to God, this white chick and her mom step in front of me and my momma (see how black folk get now she's my momma)and holds up a nightie to the sister and abruptly says, "I need this in a size whatthefuckever(cause I don't remember, but heffalump should have been in lane bryant)!"
Anyway, the young lady said, "it'll be just a minute..." Before she could finish the bitch cuts her off with, "ummm, excuse..." At that point I cut the bitch off. I looked at my mom and said, "now you see white folks don't know their place out here, George Bush is settin' them up to get their asses clowned, white folks know their position in Cali." Yeah, sure did say it like that.

I looked at her and mean mugged her ass so hard I could've turned that ho to stone...The trick and her momma stepped back, rolled their eyes and waited their turn.
I'm cool on the south ya'll can HAVE it. I love my people and I always go back for special occassions but that mess that happened to homegirl in that bank wouldn't fly out here.

But you know what that's about, white folks (ya'll know which ones) are getting nervous because they feel they're grip slowly slipping away...

Sorry so long a chick is quite long winded.

(damn is it me or are the word verications like 20 letters long? damn!)

dejanae said...

i'm mad it looks like i cant friggin spell


how the hell did i make the same mistake twice?

MsPuddin said...

Haha “when keeping it real goes wrong”

I don’t know, stuff like that I have to let roll right off my back, because if you get all hyphy, you re just stoopin to their level. Ignorance is bliss, but they the ones that look stupid, not you...

12kyle said...

@ PrettyBlack
You said that and mean mugged her? LMAO!!! I would've loved to have seen that. You're right...Bush set them up. She damn near got "murderlized" up in that store.

@ dejanae
LoL! It's all good

@ MsP
You are right! Ignorance is bliss!

Anonymous said...

You rise by condescending in situations like that. Something along the line of, "It is unfortunate ma'am that you lack the intelligence to express yourself in more civilized terms," as you continue to walk toward your destination.

When she screams something equally vituprative at you (and she will), thank her for publicly proving your point...again. Then move on.

Shame that this stuff still goes on, but I suspect it will always be with us.

Miss Mika said...

I am sure this was a case of a woman who couldn't balance her checkbook properly and wanted to place blame on someone. Convieniently for this racist old bitty, it was a black woman. In my opinion, your friend did the right thing. If looks could kill though, I would have shot her and her weak husband the look of death and hoped she had a heart attack right there on the spot.

Lord, forgive me for saying that.

~Ms. Moore~ said...

Kyle my friend I am sooooooooooooooo glad you did not touch that woman. The man would hold you in jail WITHOUT bail and I would have to send you pack of cigarettes and you don’t even smoke =(
The saying “Choose your battles is so on point”. Besides you walked into the middle of something and you don’t have a clue as to what started the drama. It was the duty of the bank manager to handle that situation.
Quick – true – story: while working customer service at Wachovia a white man called a rep the n word and cussed every n in her family. The office manager (a white man) listened to the call, closed the customer’s account and sent him a letter stating that Wachovia did not want his business. I am glad the young lady on the phone remained calm and did not stoop to the customer’s level of ignorance, because she could have gotten fired if she had.
Sometimes you just need to let go and let GOD handle it!!!

12kyle said...

@ Sojourner G
vituperative? had to look that one up. lol. But I totally agree with you. If you say that, she's gonna say something even crazier to you. Good point!

@ Mika
awwwwwww shyt! You are dead wrong for that, Mika. But it's funny as hell and I feel you!!!! LMAO!

@ Ms Moore
It wasn't me. It was Mike P. LOL

I dunno if I could have sat through that verbal abuse over the phone. I'm glad that they did the right thing.

Anonymous said...

I liek to takin shit on the towelet and yeah