Wow! That felt good.
Those were the thoughts that ran through Pete's mind. He had just finished a long, steamy, sweaty session of passionate smashin' with his friend Dyna. The both lay in the bed in the afterglow of what just happened. This was not the first time that they had sex. Their sexual relationship has been going on for 6 months. Pete met Dyna through one of his boys. In fact, Dyna had slept with the same dude who introduced her to Pete. She didn't mind b/c she had only slept with him once. Pete didn't care either. He figured that they'd smash once or twice and then he'd move on. He wasn't really looking for much. He had just gotten out of a 3 yr relationship from a woman who he thought might be the one but she was someone who he grew tired of. She spent too much time bitchin' and moanin' about stupid stuff. She didn't want much outta life anyway. So, he was better off.
Pete liked Dyna. The chemistry that they had in the bedroom was phenomenal. Initially, he didn't expect to have much in common with her. He had his masters degree. He was a marine biologist by day and by night he was a dude who enjoyed the nightlife. Dyna wasn't like the typical woman who he was used to being around. She had a high school diploma and she had no ambition to go to college. She was doing some modeling on the side but other than that...she didn't even have a job. Dyna was far less qualified than Pete's ex girl. She just didn't measure up...or did she???
Over a period of time, Pete found that the more time that he spent with Dyna...they had a lot in common. She loved house music just... like he did. She loved to discuss worldly news and Obama...just like he did. She was a ride or die chick. He found that he could talk to her about anything. More importantly, they made each other laugh. He felt good when she was around. She never asked for a dime when they were together. When they went out to dinner, she paid for herself. Pete made nearly 300k a year so he could easily handle a meal but Dyna wasn't having that. She was an independent woman. She had no kids nor did she want any. Neither did he.
If the walls could talk in that SoHo apartment...you'd be amazed with what you heard. There was a chemistry between the 2 of them that neither of them had seen before. But it was more than sex with them. They respected each other. They gave each other space. They never blew up each other's phone. She never spent the night at his house. Not because she couldn't but she just didn't want to crowd him. They never tried to define what was taking place.
Back to that night...
They lay in the bed drenched in sweat. It was 2am. She was thinking that she should get up and head home. She wasn't looking forward to that drive home. This night, she would have preferred to stay in SoHo. As they lay, still buzzing off the L that they had just finished off, they began to talk about a party on Saturday. But the conversation changed to a different path
Pete: "Why don't you spend the night tonight. I really don't want you to go. You can just leave in the morning when I leave for work.
Dyna: "Ok. I can do that. Pete...there's something that I want to tell you. I really don't know how to say it.
Pete: "What's the matter?"
Dyna: "I don't know where to begin."
Pete:"Spit it out. What is it? Do you wanna see somebody else?"
Dyna: "NO! It's not that. I just don't know how to say it."
Pete: "Tell me."
Dyna: "Well...i just feel like it should be more than what we have. Don't you? I mean...I'm falling in love with you."
BOOM!!!
What should Pete say?
What should he do?
Is Dyna the right one for him?
Is Pete afraid of the big 'C' word...commitment?
Holla!
40 comments:
Wow, I’m first but only cause I should be working on my paper.
Often times women and men alike use the phrase I think I’m falling on love with you because we (in our twisted little minds) think that may somehow draw that person closer to us. Sadly to say that generally does not work.
That's all for now..back to my paper.
Wow, hmm I think Pete should re-evaluate his relationship with Dyna. If they share so much in common and he finds that he really does care for her then he should give it a go! If not then he should leave miss thing alone because its obvious she I starting to care for him.....
Good post! It's so many ways it could go, but I'll go with my girl Lauryn Hill when she said....
"what u want might make u cry...and what u need might pass u by if you don't catch it....but ironically u'll find out what you wanted WAS what u needed if you just let it be"
May have quoted it wrong but you feel me! They both have feeling for each other, but maybe they should see if the chemistry still exists without the late night smashing....If so, she could be what he needs.
They should separate for a minute and if they find themselves really wanting to be together then it's the real thing. If they forget about each other then it was just infatuation and amazing sex.
Or, they should get together without sex and if they are still compatible then it's love.
he already made the same thing clear first... anyway. yep. when he asked her to stay the night he was basically putting his feelings on the line. and i agree with dream'08 in that he should evaluate his feelings thus far.
i know the q&a post has ended, but i'm peeping all these references to NY and wonder where the east coast swagger comes from? always a mystery, huh?
I think a better question or dilema is......What happens when you jump off wants to be your main squeeze?
This is really what throws a dude for a loop. When we meet a woman and immediately thing she's G material (girlfriend)then the committment conversation is easier for the man. He does everything to actually make it happen. And we all know most women come into it thinking committment.
BUT!!!!!!!! When it starts off as just jump off sex........Then that decision to transition to a relationship becomes a LOT harder for a dude.
@ Anonymous
Thanks for taking a break from the paper to check in at the 12th Planet.
You made a very interesting point. Do you know that from experience?
@ DreamCop08
Welcome to the 12th Planet. Make sure that you come back. We have a good time over here. We're here every day like a stray cat at lunch time.
Good points! Do you think it's "too early" for Pete to be serious again? I mean...he just got outta a 3 year relationship.
@ Keisha the Kitten
LOL @ u! I got the L Boogie quote. Should they stop smashing? If so, for how long?
@ prettyblack
Hmmmm...it sounds like they are fiends for each other. Can they real stop now?
@ PRO
Wow! I never thought about it like that. So, if he asked her to stay then that was the first step for him, huh?
Lmao @ u. The swagger is there. Been here since '72. LOL. South Carolina is on the east coast, right? LOL
@ Brad
Homerun, playboi! Homerun! You nailed it. That's a very interesting perspective.
Here's my question to you...does it not bother you that she slept with one of your boys first? I mean, if she becomes your girl then you have to know that he's seen her nekkid too! For SOME men, that's a problem!
i think they are already going threw all the motions without officially defining it. They have been messing around for 6 months already you said so they should be at the point where they can talk about where this thing is going. He obviously has feelings for her so he should make them be known and just let her know to ease into the situation. That what they have is going well and he wants it to continue... in the same casual way without the pressure of having labels. Let it be known that they are only messing with each other... but that doesnt mean they have to be gf/bf
Also I think it depends on how old they are... in they are in their 20's they still have time to test the waters and chill for a bit... I think if they are older than that than the female is probably getting the itch to want something more permament and if that is what she wants and he doesnt than she made to step off if she is ready to commit and he isnt
Every situation with this storyline is different though so its hard to tell.
They most certainly need to re-evaluate their intentions with each other though
12kyle. That "slept with my boy" thing would have deaded it for me from day 1. Wouldn't have even gone there in a jump off situation. I don't follow up behind my boys for no reason. Too many beautiful choices out there for the the drama, and negative thoughts.
But while you playin, one of my boys used to kick it with this chick back when we were about 19. Then another partner of mines ended up dating her. These 2 dudes knew each other. We even hung out as a crew on several occasions. But they were never tight. Anyway 15 years later my boy and this woman are married with 3 daughters.
You don't upgrade jump offs. Bad idea.
Jump ship homie.
This happened to me once. Umm luckily I was on the phone and acted like I didn't hear it, as I quickly said good night and hung up.
Well obviously he doesn't feel the same. Before that night, she's never been important enough to even stay the night.
I think he should just say they should take it slow and see what happens. Leave it at that.
PS: She slept with a friend of his. I'm gonna agree with the dude that said you don't upgrade the jump off.
but aren't the feelings mutual?
maybe he's in love and just doesn't know it yet.
-KB
Jeez Louise- hell if I know! Y'all just LOVE to find ways to remind me that I ain't got no man, don't ya?!?!
lol
take time to evaluate the sitch. from what i read, they are perfectly compatible, even beyond the physical...so why not?
What should Pete say? Pete should tell the truth. He thought she was was just a fling which is why he slept with her so quickly in the first place. Personally, I wouldn't want to sleep with someone my friends slept with. That's too close for comfort for me. Anyway, he just needs to fess up and not play games with the words to dress it up. There's way too much of that going on these days.
Is Dyna the right one for him? I don't believe in love at first sight and I don't believe in "soulmates". I just believe that there is a person who is there at the right time and the more time you spend with them you grow to love the qualities that person has and you "for the moment" tend to overlook things they do that annoy you...
Also, momma always said to date someone that has at least the bare minimum education that you have. Dang, at least have the desire. Education will not take care of everything but it sure helps OVERCOME some of the obstacles...
Is Pete afraid of the big 'C' word...commitment?
Of course he is which is the reason he was involved in a jump off to begin with. He went in looking out for himself...
follow his heart -- what's the WORST that could happen? If he has no issues with the fact that she slept with his boi - she MUST be the one! LOL! he can always have her sign a pre-nup if the C word leads to the M word. LOL! But, life is short! Second chances -- well, just say some of us are prayin' for 'em;-)
*throwing salt* "yeah you know me" (that's my corny ass NY reference just for you, lol)...
my mental jury just sent me a lil slip of paper and inquiring jurers want to understand her need for i-n-d-e-p-e-n-d-e-n-c-e around a $300K brother? They want to know why'cum HE let her pay solo for those mini dates? If this was a story to be considered publication I'd edit that line before I gave it the green light. LOL Come on. That brother couldn't have possibly let her pay her own way. Feed that marine biologist to the sharks man!
@ Eb the Celeb
Mah bad. I should have given you their ages. He's 29 and she's 25.
With that said...do you think they should continue without putting a label on what they have or should they move towards a relationship?
@ Brad
I feel the same way, bruh. I don't go where my boys have gone...even if it's just to smash. You just never know about the fallout from that. I guess the story would be different if he didn't know that his boy had sex with her. But he KNEW it. It was more like "puff, puff, pass". I can't get down like that. You feel me?
@ Urban Thought
Where you been man??? LOL
Sounds like she was a lil more than a jump off to him. And he liked her more than a real playa would.
@ OD
You got dudes sprung like dat? haaaaa! I hear ya!
Actually, she could have spent the night before that. She just chose not to stay.
@ karrie b.
Is it love or is it lust?
@ Jaded NYer
LMAO @ U!!! Well...at least he's in NYC. Ya neva know. You just may "run" into him one day.
@ PCD
I hear you. So you give it a thumbs up?
@ As the World Turns
Welcome to the 12th Planet. Make sure that you come back. We have a good time over here. We're here every day...hangin out like wet clothes
Ah hah!!! Finally somebody points out what might be a serious problem...their education gap. She has no interest in going to school. That could be a major issue.
@ CapCity
The M word would be a huge step...for either of them
@ PRO
Who says that this is a story? Maybe its very real and the names have been concealed to protect the innocent? LMAO!!!
Good point, tho!
Not the sharks?!? LOL
I'm curious about something. Some people have mentioned that they should take it slow. How slow should they take it after 6 months of loving? Is that realistic to back off the bomb loving to see where the relationship goes? I don't see it.
Help me out with that one.
@ dejanae
I think they were initally looking for a good time. Neither were looking for a mate. But now...here they are.
@ Brad
Is that realistic to back off the bomb loving to see where the relationship goes?
LMAO @ u, son! But that is an excellent question. As men, you KNOW our answer!!!
This was better than my 12:30 soap 12Kyle. LOL
The situation started off shady by him getting with a girl that banged his friend. VERY AWKWARD..
Obviously they both enjoy each other's company and he invited her to stay the night. This is where I think alot of women go wrong. We need to understand that you don't have to make everybody you casually date your boyfriend or your husband. That is how we so often get our feelings hurt. The key word is CASUAL. There is absolutely nothing wrong with hanging out and having a good time. It's all good. But, as soon as you let him hit it...you can forget it. If he wasn't really that into you in the first place he damn sure doesn't have a reason to stick around now that he has already divided and conquered.
I am a firm believer in you can't help who you like, but love on the other hand, it totally an option. I personally think they should go for it. As for her being just a jump off...I think the roles we play (wifey, jump-off, f*ck buddy, etc.) are based solely on the situations we are in and don't always truly identify who we truly are. To the man that couldn't see her depth, she was nothing more than a mere jump-off, but to one that sees her worth, she could very well be wifey material. I don't think it's a case of turing a whore into a housewife, but more about one man's trash another's treasure. In THIS case anyway. Just my opinion. I digress...
enjoyed the read.
i think she he should continue on with her and just let it flow. they already have alot in common and experience good sex, so although who really knows if anyone is the right one, she was good enough to kick it with...so she's good enough to love. really love i mean.
i don't think there's any question that he's afraid of commitment. we all are. lol.
i forgot that you are married, bruh. my bad. so i will just say how the majority of single dudes are.
Kyle I really think that Pete should really think about this! Its kind of funny that Pete has to think about the feeling that he has for Dyna! Normally men have it all figured out!
Pete should take it slow and see where things go! So she doesn't have an education and she did sleep with the friend! If they other things in common and Dyna is a good women then it shouldn't matter!
Really make sure to take it slow because 3 months is kind of early to be entering a relationship! We defintely don't want Dyna to be that rebound chick!
I'll defintely be back Kyle! Love ur spot!
Sometimes you have to break the general rules of play to find your own version of happiness. One thing that I've learned during this life is that when it all comes down to it. It's you and your chick, not you, your chick and your boys. You will spend way more time with her than you will in the company of others. You can't worry about what other people will think and you can't trip off of how you ended up together. (Hence the "jump off" label she got tagged with). Besides, he's stayed as long as he has despite how they ended up hooking up.
She sounds like a decent young lady. She may have slept with his boy, but like I said, he knew that going in, and everybody was cool with it. If he thinks he could honestly give her his heart then I'd say go for it.
It takes a real man to go against the grain and follow his heart.
"@ CapCity
The M word would be a huge step...for either of them..."
Well, den shiiid - if his paypahs not at risk - Tell her u love her & keep it flowin' - u know how jokahs DO! LOL! Cuz az Don co-signed most single folk are afraid of commitment anyway. If ol' girl is so independent & won't let him pay for her meals & she know he's livin' 300k large then she's beat him to the mind games with the i love u thang. Cuz a REAL independent woman will NEVAH be the first to say that! We KNOW those 3 words skur the F&%K out a Brothah!
@ LRenee
Thanks for the compliment. This is the first time that I've told a story on the 12th Planet. I didn't know how it'd go over but I like the responses. Who knows...I may do it again.
btw...I've got nuffin on the Y and R. I'm still tryna figure out how Victor Newman has managed to sleep with errrybody on that show and he's still alive. I digress... Lol
The word CASUAL is very important. Can you really go from casual sex partners to real lovers? Good points, LRenee
@ Queen
I don't think she's a whore but she may be viewed as such b/c she knowingly slept with 2 friends. Not a good look. I really think that Pete is concerned with what those in his inner circle would say about them as a couple.
@ Don
It's all good. LOL. I feel you. I wasn't always married. Haaaa. A comittment is a huge...um...comittment!
@ DreamCop08
"Normally men have it all figured out!" Wow! LOL. I hear you. She could definitely be a rebound chick
Preciate the love and the vibe!
@ Rich
You bring an interesting side to it, man. As men, we tend to REALLY care about the perception. We used to have a saying back in the day..."Are you gonna live for the fellas or live for yourself?" That means, you decide if you are gonna make yourself happy or your crew?
@ CapCity
Scare? Those 3 words will make a brother run away...REAL FAST!!! LOL
P.S. u gotta come thru my spot on Friday - this inspired my Grown Folk Friday topic open for MALE responses ONLY, this week! ;-)
Okay, I know Im late in the day but....
A jump off is a jump off.
If you establish it that way from the beginning by communicating then thats it. Theres no emotional hook up, no feelings, no looking in the eyes, not even kissing in my opinion. It is what it is and if thats understood from the beginning then thats all it should be.. some damn
BANGING SMASH !!!!!
Pete needs to think about what he's looking for in life and then he needs to think about how he feels. The way the situation is laid out (and very well written I must say) implies that there would be a problem. There very well may not be.
If I'm Pete: "Babe i'm so glad you said that. I've been giving myself fits on how to tell you the same thing. You've done nothing less than produce the key to unlock the words residing in me: I think I'm falling in love with you too..."
['course maybe that's just the romantic in me. a good woman is HARD to find]
LOL at Pro's jury.
After reading some of what the brothers had to say, I'll stick to my guns [giving Rich the "w'sup" nod].
I don't hang out with a lot of the brothers. I'm kind of a loner so I do what pleases me and mine. If it's right it's right. There are more people in blog world lookin' and talking about it than those that have and are happy about it.
Can you imagine partner finding his one and only and fading into the blissful distance while you let yours go for some unwrtitten rule that long since stopped mattering? That'll keep a person real warm on a cold winter's night.
Pete should be honest. Not just with her but with himself also.
Dyna seemed cool with how things were going. Why the change all of a sudden.
The one night he wants [or at least asks] her to stay, she wants him to solidfy things.
He should not have had to wait this long to know where her head was at. And she should not have waited that long to share her feelings. I know firsthand what it will do.
They both need to be honest, quit beating around the bush, and man up!
Well, Pete should be honest about his feelings for her as well. She could be falling in love, i mean you just told us of a perfect relationship besides the material gains or lack thereof. It takes so much more to make a relationship work, but this is just the beginning stage. I guess i have to ask, what does Pete want?
btw - good story
@ CapCity
I'll be there!
@ Trish
*looking @ my watch*
No kissing? Word? LOL
@ Sojurner G
""Babe i'm so glad you said that. I've been giving myself fits on how to tell you the same thing. You've done nothing less than produce the key to unlock the words residing in me: I think I'm falling in love with you too..."
Now THAT'S a PIMP!!! LoL
Good one, bruh
@ Jewells
Aint it funny that they both are kinda moving in the same direction but scared to admit it?
@ Miz
*so used to you being FIRST...smh* lol
That's a very good question. At times, I don't think HE knows what he wants.
@12kyle - Yes, i was used to being first, lol, but dayum, a sista has to stay up to 12 just, then lurk for another hour to do that...and i'm just too dayum tired to play...but know this...in my mind, i'm always first!
lol!
@ Miz
LMAO @ U!!!
Just wanted to take a second to thank everybody for participating today. This was the first short story that I have put on this blog. I wasn't sure how it'd go over but I'm glad that everybody liked it.
And yes...this a true story
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