Monday, June 23, 2008

you be the judge

Yo, I speak at schools a lot cause they say I'm intelligent
Nervous cause I'm dope, if I was wack I'd be irrelevant
I'm like the dope in your tracks until your high is settled in
You leanin' to the left, the laughter's the best medicine
But the troubles you have today you just can't laugh away
Stay optimistic, they can change, it's gon' come like Donny Hathaway
You have to pray, on top of that, act today
Cuz opportunity shrivel away like Tom Hanks in "Cast Away"
Everybody pass away, the past will pay, the family mournin'
Everybody act accordin' to the season that they born in
You fight in the streets, start bleedin' 'til the blood is pourin'
In the gutter, mothers cry 'til the Lord be livin' by the sword and
All that folks want is safety, they goin' gun crazy
The same reason Reagan was playin' war games in the '80s
The same reason I've always rocked dog chains on my babies
The struggle is beautiful, I'm too strong for you to slave me

Talib Kweli (Beautiful Struggle)


I need to get your opinion about something. I know that you have good taste in members of the opposite sex. Vibe with me on this one...

I know a dude named Pat. Real cool brutha. He's tall, smart, and women find him very attractive. Pat is in his mid 30s. He's single and doesn't have any kids. He graduated from a well known midwestern college. Sounds good so far, right? Here's the problem...he doesn't work! It's not that he's unemployed and looking for work. No. He's not looking to work! He hasn't worked since graduating college in the late 90s. He lives in the "family home" in his own wing. He has "dabbled" in the music industry as an artist but he has no steady job. Despite all of this, he's constantly being showered with gifts and trips from women. I just got an email from him the other day. He's in Paris with a female. You know me...I give props to everybody. I'm not mad at the "pimp" moves. I just have to know from y'all (especially the single ladies of the blog crew)...is he a good catch to make your mate???

I have another friend. Her name is Shywon. She's single with no kids. She doesn't have a degree but she is taking classes. She's real cool and down to earth. She's a dimepiece. I mean she is drop dead gorgeous. She lives at home with her mom despite the fact that she'll be turning 30 later this year. She doesn't make a lotta money but she goes out a lot. Normally, guys will pay for her dinner or a night on the town. She doesn't sleep around but she will "milk" you financially if you let her. Her goal is to be a model! She has done some modeling in her past.

I'm not one who wants to step on anyone's dream but I think the window maybe closing on the idea of being a model. As a friend, I won't tell her that. Nevertheless, she's more concerned with "getting by with her beauty" than being focused on school or a career. Here's the question...is she a good catch to make your mate?

You be the judge!

Hollatchaboi!

45 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm first.

Anonymous said...

In my opinion neither one of these two are good catches. But in today's society people are often times more concerned with what works for them and these two seem to have something working for them. However, you must keep in mind that nothing in life is free and you must decide if you are willing to pay the price when the time comes. That's all for now.

Dreamy said...

okay Kyle, in my book these two wouldnt be a good catch they have nothing going for them. Especially the guy I mean you are grown azz man that still lives at home and doesnt work. Then he is a womanizer also. In my opinion only desperate and shallow minded people date people like the two you described.

so no i dont think those two are good cathches.

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Dude sounds like he dates a lot of OK Ho's (they just chicks who are down for whatever, even if they foot the bill). He's definitely got the pimp game and gone.

Your girl is just a step up the rung from him, but she might luck up and find a dude who will make life easy for her if she is good with the domestic skills. But time is running out for her on more than just the modeling. The older the chick, the more you expect her to have her stuff together.

Neither looks to be a good catch.

CapCity said...

gotta agree with anon & dreamy
neither of these folk would be anyone i'd introduce to friends as a hook up ... but i HAVE been told that i'm "too picky". LOL!

I've been working/earning income since i was 16. Kept the promise to myself NEVAH to live at home again after I graduated college. So, while i have some great friends who DO live at home w/ their parents - i can't tolerate a Grown MAN as a regular date/mate who's never had to navigate his OWN place & money. He'll have NO CLUE what I've gone thru...

Not even sure I could do well with a trust fund baby who didn't earn SOMEthing of his own/have a work ethic...

But, really - who knows what The Lawd's got in store (but I BET it don't include ME being NOBODY's SUGAR mama;-).

i.can't.complain. said...

im gonna go w/no on the guy being a good catch.

actually ima go with hell no

but, someone seems to think so

shucks... i havent even been to paris

if pimpin' doesnt work out for him

he should definitely write a how-to book

or pamphlet at least.

i could use a trip to venice, italy.

-1-

The Jaded NYer said...

I make it a rule not to support anyone financially that I did not birth or gave birth to me, or is not related to me by blood on my mother's side.

so neither one of these fools are going to Paris on my dime.

and you can tell them I said so, too.

Mizrepresent said...

Hell to the NAW on Pat. Beauty or foineness doesn't last forever, that gigolo gig will be up soon. And Shywon, well she too will see, but i can't believe the parents of these kids, they too need to kick the kids out the nest.

12kyle said...

these are real people...the names were withheld to protect the innocent haa

@ anonymous
They are definitely more concerned with the things that work for them

@ dreamy
I wouldn't call him a womanizer. He's a playa. But he lets these females know that he doesn't want a long term relationship up front. He doesn't play games

@ Rich
I dunno if you could really call em ok hoes. LOL. I've never seen him with anything less than a 9. I'm talking stunnaz, bruh! LMAO!!!

Oh yeah...she's not too good domestically!

@ CapCity
You? A sugar mamma? Naw. That won't happen in a gazillion years. Great points, tho!

@ -1-
LMAO!! You are right. If I were single, I'd be asking him how I could get to Hawaii

@ Jaded Santana
I'll tell em! haaaaaa

@ Miz
I feel you, Miz. At some point, you gotta leave the crib and stand on your own 2 feetz.

Eb the Celeb said...

your male friend needs to get it together... fo real... you'sa grown ass man... so you should act as such... women get restless and tired of the same old mess... they may put up with it now if you know how to work the middle, but as far as taking anything further it aint gon happen without a J-O-B, but doesnt seem like he's worried about falling for any one of them either so I guess he has a good gig.

the female really needs to start working on a new passion that boat has already sailed... most models careers are over by 30... she should have started 20 years ago!

She need to concentrate on finishing them classes!

proacTiff said...

pat and shywon should hook up. then both will be smacked with the reality that they ain't got themself "nothin" which in turn will hopefully prompt them individually to make a change (read: grow up/man up/ woman up). shywon with her beauty couldn't be wined and dined by pat; pat with his suave-house tactics couldn't be wined and dined on shywon's minimum wage dime. they'd be like to good-looking bumps on a log sitting at either parent's house calling it date night. lmao.

my thing is how come pat is so fortunate to meet women who are paying 100% for the dick and giving the p' up for the free? i didn't know sexy, single, no kids had that kinda price tag on it? i blame the women. and in shywon's case if she real about modeling she need to take it to St. Louis. i saw on life in the fab lane where the models there were garbage (according to kimora's staff when they were in need of some for a phat farm show there). basically she needs to be about it if that's her sole focus.

12kyle said...

@ Eb the Celeb
I really want to tell her that she needs to move on from the modeling tip but that's not in me. Sometimes you gotta let go.

@ PRO
"The pussy is free...but the drugs cost money- KRS-1 (whuchuknowboutdat?)haaaa

You are too funny. You know what...I saw that episode on Kimora's show.

Keisha "Kitten" Isaacs said...

Pat sounds like some eye candy in deed...but I wouldn't be interested in having him or a man like him as my husband...WHY?...Well, that's simple my brother....I want a man that is able to be the head of the household...take care of his family...and be a good role model to our children.....A man with no job and NO DESIRE TO OBTAIN ONE would have a difficult time doing what I mentioned above...in our crib....just wouldn't work for me....But hey to each is own...just not my type of catch...back into the pond he goes!!!!

Darius T. Williams said...

I think by bringing awareness to these scenarios - we know the deal. I think neither of them are a good catch. If you thinking about it - a catch for what? Now granted, they may be mad fun to hang out with. Who knows - but when it comes to getting to know someone and forging a bond, with these two scenarios, it's likely impossible.

Then, you know what - you never know. They always say there's someone out there for everybody, right?

Mo said...

Um...no to either. Ambition & drive are attractive....what are they doing w/their lives? Cuz sooner or later, someone younger & better lookin w/rock hard abs & a better shape is gonna come along & these two'll be left in the dust. They need to get their lives together.

The Pew View said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Pew View said...

Baby you know I likes me some fine young mens. Well I mean I used to likes me some fine young mens. Some might say I did too much for my ex sugason Tyron but most he came say is that I took him sailing on my row boat in the lagoon. Paris my ass (forgive me Lawd) them womens must not be on a fixed income? He too high price for a lay to me, so I say no he ain't no good catch.

Far as Tyra or whateva the girl name is she got some sense to get a free meal or something out them mens. Now I might have to kick her tail myself if she getting treated to them fancy meals and she going in the bathroom throwing them up trying to stay thin for her modeling career. The devil is a liar. You don't throw up no fancy meals. Come to thank of it, she sounds selfish as hell if she be doing that. So no she ain't no good catch either. Take care now.

Signed
Ruthie Ann

Trish said...

Hell No! they are not a good catch.
The guy needs to get a life and I'll be damn, if Im going to support a guy who isnt even trying and doesnt care.
There are always females out there who will stupidly look beyond the reality and get with a brutha just because hes fine and if the "get down" is good they just get caught up. Next thing you know they are giving this dude part of their hard earned money, paying for lunch, etc.
While hes telling them oh yeah, Im in the music business, or Oh yeah, Ive been looking for a job but I cant seem to find anything.


As for the female, she seems to be stuck in her dream and not living the rest of her life, hoping this dream will one day come true.
The modeling world would consider someone at the age of 30, ready to retire from the modeling game.
Not that it cant happen for her but I think she needs to continue living life and not hold out hoping and wishing.

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

LMBAO

these women dont understand that beauty externally is fleeting
and real beauty is in the heart
one day they will be
by someone standards
fat and ugly

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

1
who would buy the book

rich, dreamy, cap
with yawl

and you know how i feel but men as such nuff said

Sexxy Luv said...

Neither is a good catch in my book!

But some folks do like to have a good looking person on there arm so you never know.....

arychtexas said...

they are vitcims of WACK AND LAZY! The gurl needs to grow up if she aint tryna be in RAP VIDEOS her model career is done dont she watch americas TOP MODEL? They say between ages of 18-27 OR 28 BUT 30? NAW YOU DONE MODELING IS A YOUTHFUL NOT YOTHLESS and ya dude we all got friends like that he needs to move out thats ridiculous! he needs to be a man a stand on his own 2!

ShellyShell said...

Is this dudes real name George? I know a dude just like this. I wouldn't date him. He has zero ambition/drive. These chicks who are taking him on trips are foolish. What they are looking at is his house etc and what he could possibly do for them in the future! But he ain't doin shyt! His parents pacify this behavior! WTF is wrong with them? I don't want to be with NO grown azz man still living at home even if it is in a different wing of the house! Who wants to come out of a room and possibly run into dudes mama in your drawls!

As for the chick you need to sit her down and tell her that the model ship has sailed away with out her and keep working on that degree! She's going to be 50 sitll living with her mama!

PCD (Pretty Circle Drawer) said...

i don't play that with men. call me a prude, a traditionalist, old-fashioned or whatever...but i don't believe in men who don't work FULL TIME! i wouldn't be able to respect a man who didn't...because how is a man supposed to be the head of his home if he can't even provide or maintain said home? BOOOO!!!

also, the chick is a mess as well. living with mom is okay (i guess) if you're on your grind with a plan and a definitive date of when it will end. using the looks is futile and will end at some point...and when you're old and it doesn't work anymore, what will you have?

ewww to both of them! (no disrespect of them being your peeps)

KayC, The Quiet Storm said...

Chiming in on the "NO" on being a good catch.

The guy is milking the women who are still single in his age range because we are programmed to "hold on to that man" as we get older. They are looking at his "single, educated, with no kids over 30" status which is not common, but neither is having no job. So what is he offering besides arm candy and a stiff one?

It amazes me sometimes what women will do to say they have a man.

The girl on the other hand is the female version of the guy. She is also arm candy and a warm place to lay.

People will date both of them (thinking about potential)and after time end up mad because they will not "get off their lazy azz and do something" or "be somebody". DUH...they weren't doing that in the beginning!

Anonymous said...

Homeboy has good stats but it doesn't sound like he is trying to make much of his life. He's content on getting by. That makes him a "not" in my category.

kit von b. said...

i think both of ur friends need to get a grip...

-KB

Tiffany S. Jones said...

Not just no. HELL NO!!!
The Bible says if a man does not work, he does not eat and I say he's not working because nobody will let his ass be hungry.
I might come off a lil' brash or stand offish about this but I can not get with an able-bodied man who ain't doing a damn thing with his life.
After a while, he's going to look up and realize that life has passed him by and he's wandered aimlessly through it.
The good thing about this is that he doesn't have any children to see him being this shiftless.
I want to meet these women who have obviously lost their minds. The sad thing in all this is he's going to keep somebody who is about her business and doing something with her life. It's sad to say that a lot of women start to lower their standards by a certain age and they link up with the first man who pays them some attention.
He's probably the sweetest, nicest, kindest man these women have ever been with. And he's probably a MONSTER in the sack, but he's got time to work on that because he's not working!!!
Ugh, I didn't know people still did this!

12kyle said...

@ Keisha the Kitten
"back into the pond he goes!!!!" I like the way that sounds. LOL

@ Darius
You're right bruh. There is somebody for everybody. I just don't see these two settling down...not any time soon

@ Kieya
Looks are very superficial. She basically tries to live off her looks. There are a gazillion beautiful women in this city. She's just another face in the crowd.

LOL @ rock hard abs

@ Pew View
No. These women have loot and they are looking to spend it. I know you don't get down like that. LOL! You crack me up everytime!!!

@ Trish
When I find out what some of these women will do...it just makes me shake my head. I also wonder..."where were these brawdz when I was single??? lmao!!! juss kiddn

@ Torrance
Good point, bruh

@ Sexxy Luv
That is so true. Don't wanna be lonely so they'll do whatever it takes

Btw...congrats on the new blog...you've been added to the blog crew

@ arychtexas
Welcome to the 12th Planet. Make sure that you come back. We have a good time over here. We're here every day like a hungry stray cat.

12kyle said...

@ The F$%K it List
Maybe she should try one of those reality tv model gigs? LOL

@ ShellyShell
Noooooo. His name ain't George! LMAO @ U!!!

I think when it's time for sex...he'll spend the night at the woman's house. I couldn't see him bringing a chick to his momma's crib. LOL

@ PCD
She's been on her grind long enuf. She should really be on her own. She's been with moms long enuf to where she should've stacked some paper.

@ Kay C, The Quiet Storm
I think u hit the nail on the head. People are looking at their potential when they meet them. What good is that if you see it in em but they don't see it within themselves???

@ Jewells
Getting by...man...i couldn't live like that

@ karrie b.
No doubt, sis!

*internet dap*

@ Smarty Jones
I dunno about him being a monster (LMAO!!) cuz I dont wanna know but he runz threw up like a good laxative. That's fa sho!

TravelDiva said...

Neither one of them is a winner. They both sound like physically attractive people content to free load and get by on looks. I would not want to date Pat and would not recommend the woman to a male friend.

I'd say they should hook up with each other, but since they both live at home--you can't have two scrubs in a relationship. (no insult to your friends intended).

The Flyyest said...

much props to ol playa there but i will never wanna be with someone like that... i mean theres no drive to acheive anything there.... he seem like he will be a cooh HOMIE but thats about it!! some womer like doing things for a man....he probably be giving them cold lines to make them hoes feel sorry for his lazy ass!!!!

wont work over here buddy!!! LMAO

um shywon needs to give up the model dream...if she aint it now....it aint gonna be.... she need to hook up with ya boy...tell him to hook her up with one of his ladies brothers and maybe she will be in paris livin it up too..hahahahahaha

12kyle said...

@ Smarty Jones
meant to say run thru em...

@ TravelDiva
Yes they get by on looks and charm...but for how long?

12kyle said...

@ Flyyest
If the 2 of them got together...it wouldn't last 3 weeks. They'd be at each others throats. LMAO!!!

dessex said...

Thanks for stoppin by.....

I wouldn't consider her a good catch at all. I do commend shorty for pursuing her education...but i don't think she should be wasting a dude's time or money. Getting by with beauty will not last forever.

I am not sure how close your relationship is with her but if it is close I would be a friend and tell her that being a model at 30 is probably not a good idea. Her zenith might have past.

...they call me "L" said...

neither one of these folks is a good catch to have around long-term. they betta recognize that as soon as those looks go, it's over.

oh, and if you're really a friend, you would tell homegirl that if she hasn't made model by now, it most likely ain't gunna happen. She's 30 dammit. *wink!*

and both these fools are being enabled by their families. who the hell allows their grown ass child to still live at home at that age?!!

12kyle said...

@ dessex
No doubt! I'll be back, bruh.

I think her time as a model has come and gone. Funny thing...I think SHE knows it, too. I just don't understand why dudes are constantly throwing money at her. That makes no sense to me. Why should I waste my money on you for dinner just b/c you look good?

@ L
Good points. We're not that close for me to tell her these things. Honestly, if I thought she'd listen...I would've said something years ago. lol

12kyle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ms. Go Getter said...

both of these characters sound like a joke to me (and that's to put it nicely)! The women that tolerate "Pat" have major issues of their own because the odds are definitely against him lol...and the female needs to move on from the modeling thing or at least have a plan B lined up because 30 and dreams of modeling aren't realistic..just my 2 cents :)

Anonymous said...

K12 you know me and how sometimes I like to take the opposite opinion from everyone else just to stir up controversy. But in this case I can’t even fake it. It is unanimous neither of these individuals would make a good mate because not only do they not have anything to give but they also lack the desire to give. Often the best gift is the small one that comes from the heart.
A good relationship has to have the proper balance of give and take. The givers in their lives will eventually get tired of being taken and move on. Both these individuals need a back up plan. Who is going to take care of them when they are old and gray? What are they going to do to take care of themselves when their looks and sex appeal have faded?
Beauty is only skin deep but ugly is to the bone and in their case ugly seems to be down to the soul.
All-mi-t you touched my heart when you wrote: these women dont understand that beauty externally is fleeting
and real beauty is in the heart
one day they will be
by someone standards
fat and ugly
www.deliveringonthepromise.com/rcvmoore

12kyle said...

@ Ms. Jones
The women that tolerate Pat have issues...they are fine...but they have issues. LOL. I'm wondering how many would even admit that they have issues

@ Ms Moore
LoL @ u! I was wondering after I wrote it if there'd be somebody who'd wanna holla at em. LOL. But the inhabitants of the 12th Planet are too smart for that. Hell...nobody gave them the benefit of the doubt and I understand why.

Jazzy said...

She's damn near thirty and still an ASPIRING model???? sigh

There are some desperate people out there, who really don't mind buying companionship from a good looking guy. I'm not surprised dude isn't working. His parents let him freeload and he obviously picks women with similar traits.

I think both of them would probably get on my nerves.

dejanae said...

simply put
no and no

Dione said...

Well, trying to understand the reason old dude isn't making some major moves in the industry by now. I mean, how else is he getting all these trips and $$ from the women if he has nothing to show for it?? Dang, not even a hit single for all the TIME he has on his hands?? I'm gonna go with NO as a date-able guy on this. I'll give him some excuse like gas was too high so I couldn't drive BOTH of us and our luggage to the airport to fly to Paris!!
My girl that's a model... you're an amiable guy and people listen to you. I think you could make some reasonable suggestions for alternate career choices without her breaking down on ya... if you really wanted to...otherwise let it go, she's a big girl. she can handle the rejection...

Blah Blah Blah said...

Sounds like his family is the good catch...he just gets love by default.

I'mma set women's lib back a few years with this next statement.
Women don't have it like men...y'all can be 70 and can date a 24 year old and it's ok...and women will still come knocking on your door.
If she has what it takes to get what she wants then she really isn't defaulting schooling but being an entepeuner using her own assests. And if I am not mistaken, she is still taking classes. Is she a good catch? Depends on what a man is looking for.

Not every marriage is based off of tradition and love. We all are in what we are in for our own reasons.

I wouldn't eff with either of them.