off tha dome

random thoughts...

man, it's been a MINUTE since I've done one of these. i blame twitter for robbing me of my randomness

lil wayne is outta jail. t.i. is back in jail. so is the "great" gucci mane. who cares? wake me up when somebody makes an album worth buying

mid term elections were interesting. now let's see if ANYBODY will deliver on their campaign promises. wait...they made none. too busy mudslinging

Prez O said his adminstration hasn't done a good job of telling people what they've done. hey Prez...take a page outta Dubya's playbook...do something & spend months talkin about what u did to the point where nuffin else gets done.

speaking of Dubya...he said Kanye's talk about him being a racist was "his lowest moment while in office." word? so i guess Hurricane Katrina, 9/11, & finding no weapons of mass destruction didn't mean a damn thing to you?

breaking news...the Dallas Cowboys suck! in other news...water is wet

memo to Lebron...chemistry takes time

i see that gas prices are going up! c'mon Prez O! don't start that crap!

huge fan of Denzel's but i'ma pass on this new movie. looks just like Pelham 1-2-3

have you noticed how halloween has become a reason for grown folks to be as nasty as they wanna be? all you ever see is naughty/slutty nurse outfits

neva been on a cruise. and after hearing about the cruise that was stranded without power, it's likely that I won't ever get on one.

hi Chuck

the new cd by The Foreign Exchange is smokin! can't wait until they come back to ATL to do a show. i saw em earlier this year. phenomenal!

Kanye...shut up and grow up. you're a grown man...act like it

i love black women

memo to the ladies...if he's into your body and not your mind...leave him alone b/c when the chick with a better body comes along, you're done

memo to the fellas...be a man and LEAD. stop following the crowd and be your own man

c'mon Jay Z...you need to go ahead and swell her up! stop playin', son!

two peas in a pod!

i still appreciate the fine delicacy of a peanut butter and jelly sammich

ok...i took some heat for not seeing The Godfather and The Color Purple. i'll see em as soon a football season is over

bring real hip hop back

have you ever noticed that for some people...they won't speak to you unless you speak to them first?

Brett Favre...kick rocks!

my birthday is next month (December 9th...shameless plug) and i want cash...and a tie. i'll be expecting it from you.

the last half hour at work is always the longest

12 Radio every Wednesday night at 9pm EST. Tune in

Fred told Esther that he could put her face in some dough and make some "gorilla cookies"

12 Radio (Marriage)

Top 10 Listening Tips for Married Couples


1. Don't Interrupt

Let your spouse finish what they are saying. If this is a problem and you interrupt a lot, find someway to remind yourself to keep quiet. Some people put their chin in their hand as a sign to themselves to not speak til their mate is finished talking.

2. Keep an Open Mind

Don't judge. Jumping to conclusions or looking for the right or wrong in what is being said prevents you from listening. Think before you say anything in response, especially if it is an emotional reaction.

3. Make Listening a Priority

Listen without planning on what you are going to say in response. Let go of your own agenda. Be aware that you need to listen. Make eye contact. Pay attention by not looking at the TV or glancing at the newspaper or finishing up a chore.

4. Use Feedback Technique

Let your partner know that you heard what they said by using a feedback technique and restating what was said. Say something like "I hear you saying ...." Be open to the possibility that you didn't hear clearly what your spouse was saying.

5. Watch Non-Verbal

Be aware of non-verbal signs and clues - both yours and those of your mate. These include shrugging your shoulders, tone of voice, crossing arms or legs, nodding, eye contact or looking away, facial expressions (smile, frown, shock, disgust, tears, surprise, rolling eyes, etc.), and mannerisms (fiddling with papers, tapping your fingers). 55% of the message is delievered through non-verbal signs.

6. Blocks to Listening

Try not to fall into these patterns of listening: mind reading, rehearsing, filtering, judging, daydreaming, advising, sparring, being right, changing the subject, stonewalling, and placating.

7. Stay Focused

Focus on the main points that your spouse is talking about. It's ok to ask questions to clarify what you thought you heard.

8. Gender Differences

Although not true for everyone, men and women generally communicate differently. Being aware can enhance your listening skills. Men often share because they want to give information or solve a problem. Women tend to talk to connect with someone or to get information. Women usually talk more about relationships than men. Men are often more concerned about details than women.

9. Show Respect

Respect your spouse's point of view, even if you disagree with what is being said.

10. Advice & Talking

Don't give advice unless asked for it. You can't listen and talk at the same time. Feelings are neither right or wrong.

Tune in tonight to 12 Radio

9pm EST / 6pm Pacific

Topic...Let's Get Married & Make it Work

Co-hosted by Bridgette Wright

(347) 215-7162

show link...

http://bit.ly/bX8NAN

Tha W

June 7, 1991

I remember it like it was yesterday.

One of the things that stood out...tears.

Not from me.

No way

I expected this to happen. To me, graduating from high school wasn't that big of a deal. It was an accomplishment but I really didn't put a lot of stock in it. I always had my eyes on graduating from college. That's where the tears...if I had any...would come. But as I sat in my seat on this day, I would be all smiles. I noticed that more than a few of my classmates were crying.

Why? Maybe it was because they knew this would be the last time together? Maybe? I'm not sure. Maybe they didn't want to leave our high school? Our school, Wilson High School, was a special place. It was and still is a very unique place. When I was there, it was about 90% black, 10% white...yet there was racial harmony. At Wilson, there were no racial issues. If you had a friend, they were your friend...not your black friend or white friend. I grew up there. I found who I was during those 4 yrs. It was there where I made some friendships that will last a lifetime.

I had the opportunity to visit a few weeks ago as our high school celebrated its homecoming. Wilson's Homecoming is about as big as a small college homecoming...yet it's a HIGH SCHOOL. The school has been around since 1869. It was the only place where black kids in my hometown, Florence, South Carolina, could get an opportunity a shot at an education. My grandmother never finished high school but my mom went to Wilson. So did all of my aunts and uncles and cousins. The school has a great tradition. Proud and distinguished alumni. And I'm one of them.

As I reflect on that graduation day, I'm reminded of the Class of 1991. We'll celebrate our 20 yr reunion next year. It felt good to see so many familiar faces this year. I can't wait until next year. I have many many memories from high school. I could go on and on about it but I won't. One memory that stood out was graduation day. There was about 250 of us in the graduating class. I tried my best to say something to each person that day. They say that it's the last time that a class is together. And that's true. Within a month, we'd lose a class mate to a car accident. Then another one later that year. I still remember wondering why some were crying at graduation. Maybe they weren't ready to leave? Maybe they weren't ready to leave home? Or maybe they loved that place and the people so much that they didn't know how they'd move on. But they did. And so did I. But we know that we can always come home.

Do you have any memorable moments from high school?

Love Jones on 12 Radio

"Y'all know that feeling of love that just make you feel so warm inside?
I swear there ain't nothing' like it y'all...ain't in beautiful?" Phonte of The Foreign Exchange


Have you ever had that feeling of love before?

You know. Love somebody to the point where it HURT!

The love...the kinda love that you couldn't imagine yourself without.

Or maybe it's the love that you found...

then lost...

then found again.

What about the love that feeds your soul?

Have you ever had it?

If you have had it...do you still have it? If you've lost it, what are you gonna do to get it back?



Tune in tonight to 12 Radio at 9pm EST.

Topic...Love Jones Edition Part 2

Co-hosted by Sweet Stiletto

(347) 215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/c7ZJH0

why does she cheat?

I'm no relationship expert.

I've said that 1000 times on this blog.

But I know people. And people are creatures of habit.

Thanks to the good folks at Men's Health, I found this article about the woman that cheats. Enjoy!

There are many reasons for infidelity, such as revenge, boredom, the thrill of sexual novelty, sexual addiction. But experts say that a large majority of the time, motivations differ by gender, with men searching for more sex or attention, and women looking to fill an emotional void.

"Women tell me, 'I was lonely, not connected, I don't feel close to my partner, and I was taken for granted,'" says Winifred Reilly, MA, MFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Berkeley, Calif. "They say they wanted to have someone who would look into their eyes and make them feel sexy again."

Emotional Reasons

Every affair is different, and so are every woman's reasons for her involvement.

That said, men are more likely to cite sexual motivations for infidelity and are less likely to fall in love with an extramarital partner, says Helen Fisher, PhD, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers University and the author of Why Him? Why Her? and Why We Love.

"Women tend to be more unhappy with the relationship they are in ... while men can be a lot happier in their primary relationship and also cheat," Fisher tells WebMD. "Women are more interested in supplementing their marriage or jumping ship than men are - for men, it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate.".

In one of her studies, Fisher found that 34% of women who had affairs were happy or very happy in their marriage. A greater percentage of men who had affairs, 56%, were happy in their marriage.

In the Genes?

The theory that adultery is "natural" for men, fulfilling their Darwinian need to spread their seed, has been around a long time. But the connection women look for when having affairs may have evolutionary roots as well.

That theory, Fisher says, is that from the earliest days, women paired with a primary mate to have children. But as women went out to gather food, they slept with other men, creating an insurance policy -- to have someone who would help rear children and provide resources, should their mate die.

"I don't think women are doing it because they want to have more sex, but I don't think they mind if they get it," Reilly says. "It is not really about sex per se as much as the experience of being with somebody."

Jumping Ship

Diane, who asked that her full name not be used, left her marriage emotionally long before she had an affair. The Tulsa, Okla. woman says she was living with a lot of disillusionment in a disappointing, sexless marriage.

"You feel the loss of your dreams and hopes and how you thought things would turn out," Diane says. "I was very lonely; I could never understand the concept of being lonely in a marriage until it happened."

She began to flirt with other men to get attention, but she never considered having an affair. That is, not until a business trip landed her with a friend in beautiful setting drinking wine. She began a long-term affair, a path she admits she was likely on anyway as her marriage dissolved.

Using another partner to transition out of a bad marriage is one of the common reasons women have affairs.

"They are on a sinking ship and use it as a life raft because they don't want to just jump into the cold water," Reilly says.

She also sees some women have affairs during periods of vulnerability or life change, like when a child goes off to college or after a job loss. They may see it as a form of comfort during upheaval.

Another common reason is a cry for help in the marriage. One of Reilly’s patients had an affair, ended it, and then told her husband as a way to point out they were in more trouble than he thought.

Accidental or On Purpose

Women are also less likely than men to have an affair that "just happens," because they tend to think longer and harder about the situation, experts say.

Some women take time " to warm up to it," says Marcella Weiner, EdD, PhD, an adjunct professor at Marymount Manhattan College in Brooklyn, N.Y. "Going in and leaving quickly isn't their thing. Men can walk away more easily, because their emotions are just different and it is unusual for a woman who wants to have sex and forget about it."

It may be an old notion that women are the ones who get attached in a relationship, Reilly says. But she sees that women do connect with their partners in affairs and think more about taking part in one.

"Women really can recognize the risk for them," Reilly says, pointing to the possibility of losing their partner because of an affair.

When it comes to affairs, society tends to more harshly judge women than men, Reilly says.

"Women don't easily have an affair," she says.

Your thoughts ladies? Men?

hollatchaboi

lovedakidz

And just like that...the season is over.

It came and went in a flash.

As many of you know, I coach my son Kameron's 8 and under football team. Our season ended this past Saturday. We finished our season with a record of 4-4. It wasn't the season that we expected. Three of the losses were by less than a touchdown...including a game that we lost by 1 point. The other loss was to our rival, Rock Chapel. We lost 21-7 but the referees "mysteriously" called 3 of our touchdowns back (you do the math!).

Nevertheless, I really enjoyed this season. I enjoyed working with these kids every day. For a long time, I didn't know if I'd ever want to coach football. I played the game from the age of 8 through college. I picked up a football for the first time at 8. I fell in love with the game. It was all about competing for me...even at 8. I wanted to be the best on the field. I wanted to prove that nobody could line up against me and be better than me. And that's what I did. You can't coach that. You're born with it. I didn't know if I could translate what I know to a bunch of kids. But I have...and it's been phenomenal. People always talk about giving back. Some give their money. Some give themselves. And that's what I've done. I never thought I'd enjoy it this much. I missed most of our "training camp" b/c I was working in Minneapolis. Late in July, Kameron said "Daddy, when are you coming back. I need you out there to coach me." Those words pierced my chest. I was back on the sidelines the week before our first game.

The season didn't go as planned but I loved it. Kameron played extremely well. He started the season at quarterback but moved to defensive tackle. He shined on defense. I was surprised to see him play as well as he did. He's got a lotta heart. He's already talking about next year. Next year is very promising for us. We'll have 22 of our 27 players returning next year. Think we won't win the city championship?? Think again!

I think it's always good to finish the season on a good note. For the last game of the season, we paid a visit again to our rival, Rock Chapel. The referees couldn't help them this time. And trust me...the score wasn't THIS close!

nevaseenb4

I was never much of a movie guy.

The past few years I've gotten into movies.

I like going to the movies nowadays.

I love the popcorn and the whole aura of being at the movies. I've even expanded my DVD collection. It's nice but not as big as my boy, Dluvhall's. The other day I watched The Hangover for the 2nd time. It was hilarious...again. As I was watching it, I tried to even remember when it was out in theatres. I couldn't remember. Was I too busy to see it? Or did I just not care. I remember having a conversation with my boys, Moe and Clark, about the movie. When I told them that I hadn't seen it, they asked me about some other movie. I hadn't seen it. They asked me about 3 more movies. Nope...didn't see them either. Then, it dawned on me...there are a TON of movies that I HAVEN'T seen. I know if I told you some of the movies that I haven't seen...it'd piss you off. You'd say..."I can't believe you've never seen that!" Well...here ya go...

The Color Purple

The Matrix (the original and the rest of the series)

The Godfather

GoodFellas

Casino

Die Hard

The Shining

Soul Plane (LOL)

Any of the Madea movies

Braveheart

Gladiator

Pulp Fiction

Kill Bill (1 & 2)

Blade

Belly

Monster's Ball

Precious

The Pursuit of Happiness

I could go on...but I won't.

12 Radio

Tune in tonight to 12 Radio!

Topic...Sports Wrap Up

Co-hosted by Juan

(347) 215-7162

9pm EST

show link...http://bit.ly/dkmqzU

tha killer

One in five gay/bisexual men in the 21 U.S. cities hardest hit by AIDS have HIV infections -- and nearly half don't know it, a CDC survey finds.

19% of the men tested positive for HIV, the virus that causes AIDS.

28% of black, 18% of Hispanic, and 16% of white men tested positive for HIV.

44% of the men who tested positive for HIV had been unaware of their infection.

59% of black, 46% of Hispanic, and 26% of white men who tested positive for HIV were unaware of their infection.

63% of the HIV-positive men age 18-29 were unaware of their infection.


Do you think you have a RIGHT to know your partners sexual history? If you don't, you should advise them to at LEAST get tested. It could save a life...


YOURS!

12 Radio/weinventedsex

Can a man and a woman have mind altering, earth shattering, back breaking, headboard shaking, swing-from-the-lights sex ONCE...then go back to being just friends???

What is your answer?

That question will be answered...along with a TON of other questions tonight.

Tune in to 12 Radio.

Topic...Behind Closed Doors Part 2...a entertaining discussion about what happens in the bedroom.

Co-hosted by MzInspiredmind

9pm est

(347)215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/9KAOBt

canyousaveit??

I am hip hop.

I live it and breathe it.

I am a true hip hop head.

So I say this with a passion...hip hop is about to flat line.

The musical genre that I grew up on is on life support. It's almost non-existent. It has been on life support for a while. When hip hop became sick, rap took over. I can't really pinpoint the time when hip hop fell ill. But it is clear that hip hop is gone. The sad part is that it really doesn't seemed to be missed. Turn on the radio. Turn on the tv. They are flooded with horrible rappers and horrible videos that don't have anything to do with the horrible songs. It's all garbage.

Too Many Rappers not Enough MCs

I could run down a list of wack rappers. From Gucci Mane, Waka Flocka, Plies, Jim Jones, etc. I could go on and on but I won't. People have confused what's HOT for being GOOD. That ain't the case. Most of the stuff that you hear and see...is not good. It's not that there are not MCs out there. They don't get the exposure that rappers do. "Rappers...get on the mic talk about cars and clothes/Sounding like hoes."- Common. I'm tired of rappers. I hate what rappers are doing to the game. I can't support the nonsense. In fact, I'm surprised that so many people do.

Instead of broadcasting how we smoke them trees
On the radio we need to hear more local emcees
Where you at?, c'mon where you at?
This is the difference between emceein' and rap
Rappers spit rhymes that are mostly illegal
Emcees spit rhymes to uplift their people
Peace, Love, Unity, havin' fun
These are the lyrics of KRS-One... - KRS-One


Lyrics? What lyrics?

Sometimes you have to wonder WHERE the lyrical MCs are? You won't find em on the radio. Won't find em on BET. Have you ever stopped to LISTEN to some of these lyrics of these songs? I won't lie. A ton of rap music is filled with misogynistic, degrading, and self destructive lyrics. Think for a second about some of your favorite raps songs. They are prolly some of the most offensive lyrics that you can find but they are rapped over a hot azz beat! LOL. In this aspect, I can't nor will I attempt to defend hip hop or rap. There is good and bad. It just seems now that the bad far outweighs the good. You actually have to LOOK hard to find good music. Back in the day, artists weren't afraid to be different. Nobody wanted to sound like everybody else. Nowadays, you can't tell who is who. It's some modern day shuckin and jivin. Rappers can't say they don't know any better. Their predecessors left them a platform. The platform is now bigger but the product ain't better. These record companies are only interested in making hits. The rap game is now microwaveable. You put a wack rapper in the studio and let him pop out a hit. What happened to record companies that want to cultivate artists and their growth? It's all about money now. And records aren't selling like they used to so I don't know where these rappers are coming from when they brag about their cash. They have no money. Rap is almost like pro wrestling right now. Fake...yet entertaining to some. I don't understand the fakeness.

Flatline?

I skipped watching the BET Hip Hop Awards last week. I wasn't gonna subject myself to the BS and coonery. How can BET do a show on hip hop when they don't know what hip hop is? Lil Wayne is bigger than KRS One right now. Wayne is a great rapper and that's all he'll ever be. He ain't no MC. When people talk about him they say how hot he is. I remind them that Ja Rule was hot 5 yrs ago. Where is he now? You may think I'm a bitter old man who longs for the day when real MCs are recognized for their talent and real hip hop is respected. Maybe i am. Or maybe I'm the dude who is watching hip hip remain on life support and is waiting on rap to die. That day is slowly approaching. Don't look now but the coroner has been called...somebody is gonna need a toe tag.

makeyamove!

He never thought that he'd be in this place.

Reaching the point where LOVE stared him in his face.

He couldn't run. Nor could he hide.

He had that fluttering heart inside.

Now he's forced to make a move. Should he step forward or fall back?

Could he lay his heart on the line and not feel wack?

Could he give up all of the other girls for SHE?

They had reached the point where SHE would become WE

Stop being a playa and now become one?

Stop all the partying and having fun?

They had reached a point to go to the next phase

Could it be the last of his playa days?

No. Why should he stop now. Marriage is forever. And he's not ready

But she's a great woman. Can they continue to go steady?

The homies said "don't do it...it's not your turn."

He knows he can't say no because the pain of a broken heart would burn

So he'll wait. Stall it out. He thinks they'll be fine.

Little does he know...he's already run out of time.

#musicmonday

Simply put...

He is the G.O.A.T (greatest of all time)

Michael Jackson (RIP)


Don't Stop Till You Get Enough





Remember the Time





Billie Jean





Beat It





Butterflies





Heaven Can Wait





What are your favorite songs by MJ????

feelin ya self

I found this article online the other day. Very interesting. Tell me what you think...


Most of you can probably relate to this situation. You spot someone extremely attractive and then you spark up a conversation with them. Within a few minutes, you immediately realize that this person thinks highly of themselves. Yes, the arrogance of the person is so overwhelming you are stunned they even notice you standing there.

Everyone knows that having a good self-esteem is absolutely mandatory for dating with no drama. It’s also important to have a health dose of humility! No one wants to sit through a complete self-love fest between someone and their over inflated ego.

I’m certainly guilty of taking confidence too far, but what do you do when you meet someone who is a little too arrogant? If that is the only thing that is really causing you apprehension, can it be a deal breaker?

Have you ever dated someone with too much confidence or do you think there is such a thing?

The other day I read somewhere that women aren’t attracted to men who doubt themselves. Do you think that women contribute to the rampant arrogance of men? Do men also get turned off by a woman who is not confident?

When do you think confidence crosses over to cockiness? Which one to you think you are?

#musicmonday

Today's #musicmonday artist is one of my favorite MCs of all time...Jay Z



Dead Presidents II




Can't Knock the Hustle




Excuse Me Miss




Roc Boys (And the winner is)




Song Cry




What about you? What's your favorite(s) song by Jay Z?

technical difficulties

Sup folks?

Have you tried to get in contact with me over the past 24-48 hrs? If you did...you can't. I've been having some issues with my good friend, Mr. Blackberry.

First, it started with my trackball that kept getting stuck. Then, the issue was my emails that I could not send. After being on the phone with customer service for TWO HOURS yesterday, the issues have STILL not been resolved. They had to erase all of my data (applications, address book, etc) so that I could "start over". And the issues still haven't been resolved. Now I have to go in a store to see if a tech can "fix" the issue.

At this point, I just want the damn phone to work. Since I'm paying for a service, I don't think that's asking too much.

FYI...all of you iphoney users...save ya breath. I'll keep my blackberry. LOL

I'll keep y'all posted. Hopefully I haven't lost all of my contact data that I "backed up" the other day.

In the meantime, I'll need something to take me out of this bad mood that I'm in. Hmmm...football

Have a good weekend

21 Questions to Ask a Guy

Sometimes you find things when you aren't even looking for them.

I was doing some research for tonight's show on 12 Radio and I found this information that I thought I'd share with the ladies.

Most men aren't that talkative. However, we will be conversational if you ask the RIGHT questions. You may ask...what is the right question? Here ya go...

21 Questions to Ask a Guy to Create Conversation

Background Questions

Learning about people's past can be tricky; you don't want to seem like you're giving them the third degree, but at the same time you want to know more them. By encouraging people to tell stories about themselves, you not only learn about their history, but also about them from the way they talk about their lives.

1. What's the earliest memory you have?
2. Where's the best place you ever went with your parents, and what did you do there?
3. Tell me about your best friend.
4. What kind of books (TV shows/movies/video games) do you like? Why?
5. What's the worst job you've ever had?
6. What did you enjoy (or hate) about school?
7. What's the most embarrassing moment of your life?

Personality Questions

These questions are designed to spark the imagination of the person, and drift off into speculation. There aren't really any right or wrong answers; again, the way these questions are answered tell you more about a person than the answers themselves.

8. What do you think is the biggest problem in the world today? What do you think people should do about it?
9. If you could have lunch with anyone in the world, living or dead, who would you want to meet?
10. Who's your favorite movie character? What do you like about him/her?
11. If I asked you to cook me dinner, what would you make me?
12. What's your favorite thing to do on a beautiful Spring/Summer/Fall/Winter day?
13. What's the biggest goal you're working on now? (Note: be prepared that the answer may be "You" and he should get points for quick-witted compliments).
14. If you won the lottery tomorrow, what would be the first thing you would do with the money?

Intimacy Questions

Some of these questions range from the simple emotional to the blatantly sexual; not all would be appropriate, but if you are planning to be sexually intimate, they probably are.

15. Have you ever had your heart broken? What happened?
16. If you wanted to kiss me, where would you take me to make it perfect?
17. What was your best lovemaking experience?
18. What do I need to know about your sex life?
19. Have you ever cheated on a partner? Why? Did you get caught?
20. Tell me what you think is the sexiest thing about yourself (bonus question: About me?)
21. Do you think there is a difference between having sex and making love? What is it?

Tune in to tonight's show on 12 Radio.

Topic...Dating 104 - Questions to Ask

9pm EST

(347) 215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/dv04AB

no homo

One of the things that I've always loved about this blog...it's mine! And I can talk about whatever I wanna talk about.

There are 2 subjects that I never talk about...politics and religion. It's not that I can't...I just don't.

Until today.

Unless you've been hiding under a rock for the past week, we've all heard the story about the embattled pastor, Bishop Eddie Long, of the Newbirth Missionary Baptist Church in metro Atlanta. He's the pastor who is being sued by four different men. The lawsuits accuse Long of using his power and influence within the 25,000 member church to lure young male church members into sexual relationships. The suits allege that the relationships, which began when the men were in their teens, lasted over many months. Long took the young men -- all of them teens at the time -- on trips, including to Kenya, according to the suits. Long allegedly paid for their hotel rooms, and gave the young men gifts, including a car, cash and jewelry -- all in exchange for sexual favors such as massaging, masturbation and oral sex. These accusations are even more controversial because Eddie Long, who is married, has preached passionately against homosexuality over the years. Long said that he won't "be tried in the court of public opinion but in a court of law." Well, I'm sure he'd lose in the court of public opinion. Preacher + young men = homosexuality. You can't convince most people otherwise.

I don't know Eddie Long. I've only been to his "megachurch" once. I left the church that day very impressed. I've tried to withhold judgement on this story. I've read all of the lawsuits and I've heard Long give his perspective. They each have their sides of the truth but the REAL truth is somewhere in the middle. I do believe that where there is smoke...there is fire. And there is some smoke here. Long never said he "didn't do it". These young men could have conjured up these stories. Who knows? Nevertheless, it does not look good. I guess we'll all find out in due time.

One of the things that I found interesting is the conversations that were spawned. Some "church folk" scoffed at the notion that you could not have homosexuality in the pulpit. Of course you can! Homosexuality is a part of society just like drugs/sex/alcohol. Eddie Long, like other pastors, is a man. He puts on his pants one leg at a time. He laces his Jordan's one foot at a time. Every man (and woman for that matter) sins. How do we sin? According to the Bible, we all sin in our thoughts, words, and deeds. No man is above that. For all that I know, my pastor could be looking at Ms Parker and her phat booty during the service.

Lastly, pastors like Long denounce homosexuality. Why is it that the church...of ALL places...will alienate gays and lesbians? Is that fair? You may not agree with a person's lifestyle but they should be able to worship without being picked on. Personally, I don't understand why a man would want another man. That's not my style. However, that's their choice. And the church...especially the black church where people should know the feelings of discrimination...should be the last place where people should turn a cold shoulder.

Do yourself a favor...trust GOD. Don't put your trust in man.

#musicmonday

Today's #musicmonday feature is one favorite groups...The Foreign Exchange

Wanna know who The Foreign Exchange is??? They are Phonte and Nicolay

The pair first made contact over message boards on Okayplayer.com and began recording and sending music back and forth. Soon after, Phonte and Nicolay formed The Foreign Exchange without having ever met each other in person, hence the name The Foreign Exchange.

The album, Connected, was released in 2004 and was a showcase for Nicolay's musical talents as well as an introduction to like-minded Little Brother affiliates who guested on the album. The album received strong reviews [2] and the single, "Sincere" featuring YahZarah, was released with a promo video.

In October 2008, the group released their sophomore album Leave It All Behind.

In June 2009, the group announced that Zo! is now official artist on The Foreign Exchange Music imprint and in November 2009, YahZarah also joined the imprint.

In December 2009, the group found out that they were nominated for a Grammy, for Best Urban/Alternative Performance for the track Daykeeper feat. Muhsinah from their sophomore album, "Leave It All Behind". [3]

The group recently announced that they are working on their third album, entitled "Authenticity". It is scheduled to be released on October 12th, 2010.

I saw them in concert in May and they BLEW me away. I guess you can call me...an Exchange Student.




I Wanna Know




Take Off the Blues




Cry Over You - YahZarah featuring Phonte




This Could Be the Night - Zo!

12 Radio

Who - YOU

What - 12 Radio

Where - The Innanet (BlogTalkRadio)

When - Tonight...9pm est/ 8pm central/ 7pm mountain/ 6pm pacific/ 4pm Hawaii

Why - Because I said so...that's why!


Show topic...Finding the right ONE!

How do you know if he/she is the right one? Well...tune in tonight and you'll get SOME answers...

show link...http://bit.ly/bdoQH0

12 Radio

Do me a favor...think about your life when you were a child

Now...think about your life as a teenager

Then think about your life as a young adult.

Think about all of the GOOD and BAD things that you did. Think about the things that you got CAUGHT doing. Now think about all the things that you got away with!

Now imagine yourself as a parent of a child who is trying to do some of the SAME things that you did! How would you handle it??? Let's talk about it... (fyi...you don't have to be a parent to tune in...)

Tune in tonight to 12 Radio

TOPIC - Parents Just Don't Understand...the issues that parents deal with.

Co-hosted by The Jaded Nyer

9pm est

(347)215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/d0cqyz

i still love h.e.r/12 Radio

She's back

My first love is back.

I love her and I'm glad she's back in my life.

She left me back in February and I've been lonely since she left. I've found things to do to pass the time when she was gone. But she can never be replaced. Never. She is my first love. I fell for her the first time that I held her in my hands.

One of the great things is that there are a LOT of people who love her just as much as I do.

Welcome back, baby!

Tune in to 12 Radio tonight!

Topic...NFL Preview

9pm est

(347) 215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/d8f1no

#musicmonday

Today's spotlight artist...DMX

This cat had a great run when he was on top in hip hop. He's been beset with problems with his drug addiction and jail. If he ever gets it together, he'll be back to being the old X.

I hope he comes back


Slippin'






Ruff Ryder's Anthem





What's My Name





How's It Going Down

grey skies/12 Radio

Asian.

White.

Black.

Hispanic.

Do race and ethnicity matter when it comes to marriage?

Apparently, race is mattering less these days, say researchers at the Pew Research Center, who report that nearly one out of seven new marriages in the U.S. is interracial or interethnic. The report, which interviewed couples married for less than a year, found racial lines are blurring as more people choose to marry outside their race.

"From what we can tell, this is the highest [percentage of interracial marriage] it has ever been," said Jeffrey Passel, a senior demographer for the Pew Research Center.

He said interracial marriages have soared since the 1980s. About 6.8 percent of newly married couples reported marrying outside their race or ethnicity in 1980. That figure jumped to about 14.6 percent in the Pew report released this week, which surveyed newlyweds in 2008.

However, studies show that support for interracial marriages is stronger than in the past, especially among the Millennial generation. Among 18- to 29-year-olds, about 85 percent accept interracial marriages, according to a Pew study published in February. Scholars say interracial marriages are important to examine because they can be a barometer for race relations and cultural assimilation.

The Pew Center study found that marrying outside of one's race or ethnicity is most common among Asians and Hispanics, two immigrant groups that have grown tremendously. About 30 percent of Asian newlyweds in the study married outside of their race, and about a quarter of Hispanic newlyweds reported marrying someone of another race.

The African-American population also saw increases in interracial marriage, with the number of blacks participating in such marriages roughly tripling since 1980, the study said. About 16 percent of African-Americans overall are in an interracial marriage, but researchers point out a gender difference: It's more common for black men to marry outside of their race than for black women.

The gender difference was the reverse in the Asian population surveyed. Twice as many newlywed Asian women, about 40 percent, were married outside their race, compared with Asian men, at about 20 percent.

"We are seeing an increasingly multiracial and multiethnic country," said Andrew Cherlin, professor of public policy and sociology at Johns Hopkins University. "The change in our population is bringing more people into contact with others who aren't like them."

The Pew Center also found education and residency affected whether people married interracially, with college-educated adults being more likely to do so. More people who live in the West marry outside their race than do people in the Midwest and South, the survey found.

Tune in to tonight's show. Topic...Dating 103 - Interracial Dating and other dating issues of 2010. Co-hosted by MzInspiredMind

9pm est

(347) 215 -7162

show link...http://bit.ly/c2561O

#musicmonday

Far too many times people use the word GREAT in the wrong context.

That won't be the case today.

To say J Dilla was GREAT... doesn't fully describe the man. J Dilla was ahead of his time. In my opinion, J Dilla was the BEST hip hop producer of his time. Period! Although his life was cut short 4 yrs ago due to lupus, his legacy still lives on. When you read the list of artists who he worked with, you ask yourself..."who HASN'T he worked with?" From his ground breaking beats with his group, Slum Village...to his work with Janet Jackson, D'Angelo, Common, A Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul, and Busta Rhymes. Not only was he a talented producer but he was a good MC, too!

This post is dedicated to the illest...J Dilla (RIP)


J Dilla - E = MC^2 Ft. Common




J Dilla - Won't Do




Slum Village - Climax



J Dilla - Random beats

the dash

There's an old saying in life.

"There are two dates that matter. The date of birth and the date of death."

I think this is true. We have no control over these dates. We didn't know when we'd be born. And we don't know when we will die. Death is a certainty of life. I've always joked that I will live until I am 135. I believe that. Nevertheless, I do believe that we all serve our purpose on this earth. I think we're here until God feels like we should no longer be here. It doesn't matter if you're here for 9 days or 99 yrs.

If you see someones timeline, it looks like this 1950 - 1999.

The number's are there and we can't control them. The thing that we can influence is the DASH.

The DASH represents what you have done on this earth. The dash represents your infinite possibilities on the is earth.

Remember that you control your dash.

12 Radio

Tune in tonight to 12 Radio. Topic...politic, ditto...an indepth look into the Obama Admininstration. Make sure that you check it out.

The show starts at 9pm EST

(347) 215-7162

show link...http://bit.ly/92zHsv

silence is golden...

Sometimes we have to take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves...

Am I selling myself short?

Am I just selling myself?

I've always been a firm believer that you have to keep SOME of your personal business to yourself. Case in point...last week's episode of HBO's Hard Knock series that chronicles a behind the scenes look that the New York Jets. There was a segment that featured the Jets new cornerback, Antonio Cromartie. He just joined the team a few months ago after spending his first few years in the NFL with the team that drafted him, San Diego Chargers. Despite being only 26 yrs old, Cromartie has fathered 8 children from 7 different women.

During last week's episode, Cromartie made an attempt to name all of his kids by name and age. (SEE VIDEO BELOW). And he stumbled. I felt uncomfortable watching it. I wasn't sure what was worse...1) he had somewhat of a difficult time naming all of his kids 2) having fathered 8 kids at 26






As a former athlete (and that's what I call myself), I think that Cromartie fits the stereotype that most of us try to shed. Nobody wants to be viewed as a dumb jock. I'm not a jock and I'm far from dumb. I remember when I was in college at South Carolina State University, people would be surprised when they heard me speak or do a presentation. One chick said..."You're a smart football player." Huh? Are we all supposed to be dumb? That's not me. The School of Business was the hardest curriculum on campus. I guess she didn't expect a football player to walk away with a marketing degree. LOL

Cromartie also fits the stereotype of a young black man. Promiscuous lifestyle with kids out of wedlock. It was rumored that the Jets gave him a 500k advance to "assist" him with some past due child support.

He's a great athlete and I think he's gonna help the Jets win this year. However, maybe he should stick with the old saying...."Somethings are better left unsaid."

#musicmonday

I'ma fan. Always have been

After working in Minneapolis for the past 10 months, I've grown to appreciate his music even more. He is a hometown hero there. They still play his music. One night, I got word that he was supposed to be playing at some club downtown. I went there looking for him but he never showed

Today's post is about the Purple One.

Prince

Let's Go Crazy





Darlin Nikki





The Beautiful Ones





Purple Rain



You got any favorite songs by Prince?

10 signs/12 Radio

Some women say that men aren't good at expressing themselves...

Some women say that if you watch a man closely, he'll tell you EVERYTHING that you need to know!

I think there's truth to both statements. Nevertheless, I came across this article and I decided to share it with you. Hopefully, it'll shed some light to the ladies who try to "figure us out." LOL


10 Signs that you can tell a man is serious about you...


1. He doesn’t play mind games with you

If he says he will drop in to see you, he does. When he makes plans with you for the weekend, he sticks to them. He doesn’t torment you by saying one thing and doing something else. He’s not cold one instant and warm and affectionate the other. If his ex-girlfriend calls him, he tells you about it for the sake of honesty and not in a way that makes you uncomfortable. When a man plays mind games, it’s typically because he doesn’t really care, or because the relationship is casual for him. If your man makes a special effort to be honest and open, that’s a sign of his commitment to the relationship.

2. He wants to know things about you

And it’s not just the regular stuff like “What are your hopes and dreams?” or, “What inspires you to paint?” or “What’s your favourite rock band?” He asks you questions about your childhood, your job, parents, etc. He wants to know what it was like to be the elder sister or, he always asks you how you cope with your long stressful work hours. He is genuinely concerned about your career and asks you about your plans. Even the best actor cannot feign an interest in mundane details such as, “What time did you wake up today?”. or “Did you get enough sleep last night?” If he’s serious about you, he will find all the mundane details interesting.

3. He calls you multiple times everyday

He calls you sometimes for no reason. Even if you’ve met at a coffee shop an hour ago, he calls you after he reaches home, or from the elevator. This behaviour is typically displayed in the first few weeks of the relationship, when everything is new and exciting. However, when you realize that he still calls you just to hear your voice and it’s been about a year since you started going out, you should know that he’s serious about you.

4. If he’s always punctual...

If he’s always punctual, he’s definitely into you. When a man is serious about his girlfriend, he will ensure that she doesn’t have to wait for an hour at the bus stop. He says he will pick you up for dinner and 8 p.m. and calls around 7.55 p.m. to tell you he’s stuck in traffic and will be 15 minutes late, he’s respectful of your feelings. He won’t ever have you hanging around the park for half an hour before he shows up. Most girls constantly find themselves waiting for their boyfriend’s phone call, or for him to pick them up. If you don’t find yourself in that position, you’ve got yourself a winner.

5. When he listens to you talk

Several girls complain that they can’t talk to their boyfriends and that they just don’t listen. When you spend time with him, he really listens to you. He’s all ears about your problems at work. On the train, he’s not distracted by fellow passengers, but is listening to you intently. You have long chats on the phone where he hangs on to every word you say. You find yourself telling him things that you’ve never told any boyfriend before. He’s not constantly checking his cell phone for messages, when you talk about the day. If your man remembers that it’s your aunt’s birthday in a couple of weeks, just because you mentioned it in passing, understand that he’s listening to every word you’re saying.

6. When he wants to date you exclusively

You’re his steady girlfriend and he makes sure everyone knows it. He is faithful and expects fidelity from you too. He has had the conversation about being exclusive with you. He makes sure everyone knows that he’s your boyfriend, not only because he doesn’t want random men hitting on you, but because he wants to send a clear signal to all the girls that he’s taken. This is a big step and you should appreciate him for this.

7. He’s transparent about his routine

You know his routine and what his day holds for him, not because you’re a tyrant but because he volunteers this information. You know he’s in the gym in the morning and reaches work at 10 a.m., after making a quick dash to a coffee shop. You know that if he doesn’t take your call in the afternoon, he’s probably in a meeting or in the loo. If he’s missing for a couple of hours, there’s always an explanation that’s credible. You have never wondered, “What could he possibly be doing now?” or “Why hasn’t he called me?”.

8. He introduces you to his friends

He is keen that you meet his friends and not only because he wants to show off what a knockout you are, but because he’s so in love with you. He wants his friends to know you and like you. He wants you to get comfortable with them, because this paves the way for your initiation in the group. He makes an effort to be nice to your friends for the same reasons. He wants you to meet his family. This move is not to be underestimated at all. If there’s one thing common in men across continents, it’s the fact that they only take the girl home, if they’re taking the relationship to the next level.

9. He asks for your opinion and respects it

He wants you to accompany him while he shops for clothes, because he trusts your choice. When he’s confused about his career, he talks to you and listens patiently to what you have to say. He discusses things with you to seek your opinion.

10. He’s always there when you need him

He may be foul tempered and may say hurtful things from time to time, but he's always there when you need him. When your uncle passed away, he was there to hold your hand. When you lost a job, he took you out for ice cream and reassured you. He may have his faults, but if he really cares for you, he will always try to protect you. If a bitchy girlfriend keeps picking on you, he calls her bluff and shuts her up. If he genuinely worries about you because you have cramps during that time of the month, he’s definitely serious about you.



I hope this helps you ladies... ;)

Tune in to tonight's show on 12 Radio. Topic...Dating 102 - dealing with members of the opposite sex. Co-hosted by MzInspiredmind

(347) 215-7162

9pm est/ 8pm central / 7pm mountain / 6pm pacific

Show link...http://bit.ly/abJM1Q

sometimes/12 Radio

Sometimes...
I wish I could be her man.
I could give her the world if I had the chance.
I could make her happy and I do know this
If she only knew that I even exist
She's in love with him and she doesn't see
She could get everything if she were with me
Instead she settles for his lies and abuse.
I would only give her my love and shower her with the truth

Sometimes...
I wish she'd open her eyes and understand.
I would be honored to be called her man.
For her, she'd get the utmost respect.
Endless compliments and soft kisses on her neck.
She'd rather be in his big house and driving his Benz
He could never be a real lover...never be a real friend.
Covered with bruises to her arms and her eye
She could not turn to him because he made her cry.
Sometimes I wish I never heard a woman say "These black men ain't shit."
I stand before you. Hand extended to you. And I know I'm legit.

Sometimes...

Tune into tonight's show on 12 Radio. TOPIC- E-CON-NO=ME...the rise fall and rise of the mortage industry. Understanding credit and how we move forward financially. Call in (347)215-7162

Show stars at 9pm EST

http://bit.ly/ar9y08