Thursday, November 13, 2008













I read this in this month's Men's Health magazine. It made me think.

It's time.

Time for us black men to step our game up. With Obama leading the way, it's time for us to make changes in our lives that will make us better husbands, boyfriends, fathers, brothers, uncles, and friends. As men, we can no longer use some of the lame ass excuses that we have used for so long.

Change starts from within. You can talk about change. You can talk all that you want. Don't it.

Not only should we as black men step up individually...but we should pull up the "sorry bruthas" as we climb up the ladder. If you can't be inspired by an educated, dedicated family man who doesn't have several kids outside of his marriage...then you don't have a pulse. Is he perfect? Nope. None of us are. But it's really time for black men to step up.

Keep in mind that with every press conference...every public appearance...every day the world will get to see Obama's swagger. His swag, in so many ways, is much like ours. The world will view him and us in a different light. Does this mean that it will end racism? Hell no. There are a ton of people who don't want him in the Oval Office but they have to deal with it. But how he's viewed by the world and by us black men will be on display.

That's time for us to do our part. This post isn't to bash the fellas...even tho the ladies say that I don't get on the fellas enough. LOL. This is just a call for us to look in the mirror. Don't talk about it. Do it. Find a way. Every black man has a purpose. Personally, if I ever lost sight of that I would look at my 3 sons and they would remind me of what I need to do. Be better.

Even presidential!!!


Anonymous said...

hey kyle kyle....I hope that black men step up...especially the damn fool thats trying to play me.

how are you?

Keisha "Kitten" Isaacs said...

Hey Brother!

These are great leadership qualities! I'm sure I can get many of the sistahs to agree that we would love to see our black men step into their proper place and lead the fact we'll be cheering them every step of the way!

Can I get an "Amen" my sistahs????

The F$%K it List said...

@Keisha AMEN!

I hope that it this historical moment does make Black men look at themselves. This is the time for us as a people to redefine the stereotypes that have plagued us for 400+ years. It will be hard but if we try to become the community we once were the future for our kids will be endless.

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

I'm so glad you said it!!!!!! I was wondering when was someone going to do a post like this, and as usual, you came through.

Instead of complaining, I've starting putting my thoughts into action. The other day I saw a guy with his pants sagging low, and I had to say something. Luckily, he didn't get mad, and he thanked me for being honest...he pulled up his pants and walked away.

Black men now have no excuses for failure due to can't say its do to being poor (Obama didn't have money) can't say you didn't have a father (neither did Obama) can't even say it was your environment (Obama hardly ever stayed in one environment, he even lived in Indonesia where he didn't know the language) can't say it's the White man (f*ck that, only you control you).

I agree with kiesha "kitten" isaacs...I would LOVE to see Black men step up, and no longer think an educated black man filled with substance ambitions/goals/morals is rare. Black men like you and others who are very uplifting, will have to uplift the younger men...even the older men who don't have their things together.

dessex said...


You are dead on about bring up the sorry bruthas in the world. I think we should encourage each other to strive for greatness, now more than ever we need to brothas to step up and be men and fathers out there.

People always talk about the talent tenth...and I wonder if we are doing our part!

Pigskin Loving Lady said...

I totally agree. I have two teenage sons that have a great role model in their dad but I let them know that they need to take their game to another level. It's their responsibility to do and embody all of the above. They must, we must, REPRESENT!

Keith said...

I read that same article in Men's
Health and I'm right with you on this one. This is why I spend so much time talking to the young brothers that hang around the Chinese Restaraunt in my neighborhood. Some of them still have a chance to go back to high school, to get a good job..while some have already been convicted and served a little time in jail..I tell them that all is not lost for them, as long as going to jail doesn't become a habit..I sure hope that at least one of them
hears what I'm saying...I went to school with a lot of their fathers,
so a lot of em have known me since they could pee straight.

Queen of My Castle said...

I like this. You know, most of the time as women one of the things we want most out of life is to help the men that we love and hold dear to us. We want to be your backbones and hold it down for you however we can. I truly hope this serves as a wake up call. I love Black men. La creme de la creme, in my opinion. It gets no better baby!

Eb the Celeb said...


I know your boys are going to be the best husbands ever...

you already know that I am waiting til Kameron turns 18 and if I aint found me a boo by then I will turn into a cougar for

Trish said...


xcentricgem said...

It takes strength to recognize weakness ... Thank you Kyle. I don't want to bash the fellas too much .. I'll leave that to you. I want to address the ladies in the same manner. There is no better example than Michelle Obama.

With ENTHUSIASM, RESPECT, OPEN MINDEDNESS and HUMILITY, Michelle put aside herself for a greater cause, this country and those things that she and her family believed in. Are you willing as a woman to make drastic change or sacrifices to reach new heights? I saw Michelle take the INITIATIVE to go campaigning around this country in support of her husband and the things they believe in displaying true leadership and strength. PATIENCE ... maintained and displayed even when they challenged her ACCOUNTABILITY for stating that 'Now is the only time she's been proud of her country'. She has every attribute that her husband has and they compliment each other .... Are you complimenting your significant other? Is your significant other complimenting you? Are you a far cry away from the qualities that we all posses but for some reason would only acknowledge after Obama won the election? If Obama had not won does that mean we as a people could continue acting foolish and wreckless. Unfortunate that the mentality of supression still exists.

Ladies (young and old)... stop being so desperate for someone that you'll except anything from anyone ... rather set your standards so high that YOU have to upgrade yourself to approach a man of that caliber or even be approached by him.

In the past I mentored children and I was most bothered by their mentality. I would watch them destroy their residences, litter throughout the community and swear that the 'white man' didn't want them to have anything ... But .. you could not get them to litter in the so called 'white' neighborhood ... what is wrong with this picture.

Grown men: Be men ... put forth that strength that we as black women love ... don't be irritated or feel threatened by the strength of your black woman ... (surely, you should appreciate her being able to buy her own Gucci pumps). If you've fathered children outside of your marriage .. Oh well, they are here and test the of your manhood is not in the size of your penis or how much you use it ... but rather how well you handle those situations that it brings forth.

The Flyyest said...


Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

Skoolboi had it on his site too
good look

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...


we had no excuese before obama

Opinionated Diva said...

well said!

Big O said...

true enough, great post. But it bugs me that men and women, need some greater reason to be a real man or a real woman. Obama not changing your "black status"...hell, i think its gonna be even harder on us.

whatever you responsibilities are, whether kids, should be doing that already. Theres a lack of inner motivation that people. You have to do for your self..not cuz its a black president.

Big O said...

and i second torrance about the excuses...

all that exsisted before Obama. We shouldn't have to have black pres to validate ourselves now . I think we should of done it more so because of the white ones we have had for ages.

this is really inspiring me do do a post.

12kyle said...

@ Kin'shar
Somebody is tryna play you? You want me to beat em up? LOL

@ Keisha the Kitten
We will lead. Believe me.

@ The F$%K it List
I think the re-definition is already taking place. We've got a long road to travel but we're gonna make it.

@ Beautifully.Conjured.Up
I'm glad that the brutha listened to you. Not all will be as receptive. But I'm happy that you said something. That's small but the little things mean a lot.

@ dessex
I think we're doing our part. But we can always do more. Sometimes we get so caught up and get so focused on our own problems. That's human nature.

12kyle said...

@ Pigskin Loving Lady
It's great when the kids have a role model right in the home. They are truly blessed.

@ Keith
I can't imagine living in this world without a high school diploma. I think they'd be willing to listen to you. Especially when you consider that you know their fathers.

@ Queen
We will rise to the top. You know that we will.

@ Eb
You are sooooo silly!!! LOL!!

@ Trish

12kyle said...

@ xcentricgem
WOW! Thank you again for coming thru to drop knowledge. Excellent points

@ Flyyest

@ Rawdawgbuffalo
You're right. We had no excuse before Obama...but you know that we used excuses anyway.

@ OD

@ Big O
I feel you, bruh. We both know that there are some people who are gonna be sorry no matter who's in office. LOL. Obama merely serves as an example of the heights that we can reach. I'd like to see us black men push ourselves as well as others to be better.

Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...

Kyle, thank you for clearing that up for me.

The Jaded NYer said...

hey bruh, can you do me a favor? can you forward this to my so-called "father"?

William R. Penzo


(and yes, I DID just put his sorry ass govt on blast!!!!!!!!)

That said, I, too, am eagerly awaiting the new and improved Black man. sheeeeeeeeit, if he acts right enough I MIGHT even cook n clean for him everyday AND give him a bunch of babies. I'm just sayin... it's about time...

But lets not forget, we got some triflin' females out there, too... step it up, ladies, step it up!!!

Sexxy Luv said...

AMEN Keisha!

AMEN Kyle!


ShellyShell said...

This was a great post! I agree with Keisha and Jaded...women need to step up their game as well!

Charles said...

I'm loving the list, and I cosign whole heartedly. I almost felt like you were yellin at me with the large font tho. I was like "damn Kyle, I'm doin my best over here!!!" Hahaha...but yeah, great list again.


12kyle said...

@ Beautifully.Conjured.Up
Noooo problem

@ Jaded Santana
No you didn't put yo daddy out there like that! LoL!!! Anyway, I love the fact that you MIGHT cook, clean, and get pregnant. LMAO!! U r off the chain

@ Sexxy Luv

@ ShellyShell
That's true. I think it's gonna take a collective effort.

@ Charles
Thanks, bruh. LoL. You know what...I didn't mean for the font to be that big. I did the post on my phone. I dunno what happened. I didn't realize the font was that big until I looked at it on my computer at work. Hahahaha.

nikki said...


Darius T. Williams said...

AMEN - look at you preaching! Alright Rev. 12 Kyle!

Mizrepresent said...

I so love this post 12kyle, great one as always! Yes, i believe it is time for our men to step up and be the fathers, husbands, boyfriends, brothers, leaders they were meant to be. Obama didn't set the standard, but he is a great example to follow. I cheer all of you on...forever the cheerleader, cuz i love y'all!

~Ms. Moore~ said...

Amen! Everyone has some good points but I especially agree with Big O All folks (male/female, black/white) can step their game up, with or without Obama being in office. I understand that some people are not self motivated. As Torrance said there were no excuses before (nor after) Obama. Obama has stated that he is for America not just Black America. So my brothers there will be no financial bail out for you. After all the noise about Obama is said and done the work of improving one-self still lies within the individual.

Jackie E. said...

All I can is Amen and hallelujah! It's really time for us all to step up and stop just wishing and hoping and talking and start doing!

L. Renee' said...

You are so right about this. I was thinking the exact same thing the other day for a blog topic. I look at Michelle Obama and feel the need to really step up my game as a wife, mother, and Professional woman. You can see the love she has for her family. There is no doubt that she has her man's back. I really admire her. So, ladies...along with the fellas, we need to up the anty as well.

12kyle said...

@ Nikki

@ Darius
I guess we'll call this my trial sermon. lol!

@ Miz
I agree. He is setting a great example for all of us.

@ Ms Moore
I sure could use a bailout! LoL!!! Good points

@ Jackie
I'm with ya! Let's not just talk about it...let's be about it

@ L. Renee'
We're gonna make it...but it's gonna be a collective effort.

TravelDiva said...

Great post!

Anonymous said...

Just an FYI...this is the best blog I've read this week. Posted you up on my blog!

Super Dave Van Buren said...

Amen to that. Part of me wants to say that's what the Million Man March was supposed to do but maybe Obama will be the wake up call men need. You do your part and I'll do mine...

Anonymous said...

Hey Kyle,

My Blog BFF gave you 'Blog of the Week' so I came by to read. Your post was absolutely beautiful and ON POINT! You are telling the truth and nothing but the truth. We as black women need to do the same.

CapCity said...

U definitely got presidential qualities, Bruh 12K!

That goes for Sistahs, too. Michelle stands BY her man and helps keep him focused - she quit her job to help him reach his/their/our dream! We ALL need to step up our game;-)

12kyle said...

@ TravelDiva

@ theweightofwhatisreal
Thanks for coming thru (like u always do).

I appreciate the recognition on your blog. You da besssssssss!!! Haaaa

@ Super Dave Van Buren
Great points, mah brutha. Hopefully, we'll ride the momentum for more than a few months. In the end, we'll all be better

@ mzinspiredmind
Welcome to the 12th Planet! Make sure that you come back. We have a good time over here. We're here every day like the school bully

The truth shall set you free.

@ CapCity
If we all step our game up...just imagine where we'll be as a people.

Anonymous said...

lol, your so funny.... naw man...I think I will forgive him just this once more...for the last time. Stick around though...I might need you (^_^)

dejanae said...

i approve this message

A.M. said...

Amen to that. Be Presidential.

I totally agree. We just need better men man...

Emeka Amakeze said...

Obama or no Obama, the black man never really had an excuse to be found wanting on the scale of success. There were so many black men that have flown the flag of success before Obama. We naturally need to step up our game.

Stew said...

good stuff brother....

One Man’s Opinion said...

Amen, amen, amen! I have been saying the same thing, just lot as well. I'm sick of hearing what Obama is going to do for black people now that he is in office. The man did not take the presidency to lookout for black folks, he took it to look out for humanity as a whole. Hell, that's why he won.

I was telling a friend of my little brother's that instead of wondering and waiting for Obama to do something for us we need to step up to the plate and start using all those qualities that you listed in this blog, so we can be a better example for Obama.

Be more Presidicial. Yeah, I like that.