Thursday, December 30, 2010

25 Worst Rap Lyrics Ever


If you listen to hip hop/rap, there are a few lyrics that will make you stop in your tracks...press the rewind button.

Then, there are lyrics that make you say..."whut the hell did he/she just say?"

In this case...the latter will apply.

The website, about rap.com, has presented the Top 25 Worst Rap Lyrics of All Time. While Waka Flocka, Gucci Mane, and OJ the Juiceman didn't make the list...I'm sure you'll find some of these comical and horrendous at the same time...



25 lyrical missteps that made rappers wish they could go back in time and rewrite their rhymes.

25. "Verse number 2 do the damn thang keeps on my neck pocket's full of Ben Franks."
Yung Joc, "It's Goin' Down."
Album: New Joc City


A classic case of saying...absolutely nothing.

24. "There's no need to lie folk, Why you sleepin' wit ya eyes closed?"
Timbaland, "Get on the Bus"
Album: Why Do Fools Fall in Love (Soundtrack)


Well, Tim, if I had to endure your mediocre rhymes all the time I'd definitely sleep with my eyes, ears, and nose closed as well.

23. "I can double my density from three-sixty degrees to seven-twenty instantly."
Canibus, "Funk Master Flex Freestyle"


Obviously, Canibus slept through 10th grade when they went over units of measurement.

22."Thirty-eight revolve like the sun round the Earth."
Jay-Z, "It's Hot"

Album: Volume 3: Life and Times of S.Carter

And, Jay-Z skipped his Geography class.

21. "N****s in the Bronx call me Lex cause I push a Lex, and I rock a Rolex and I lounge on Lex', and I love sex."
Peter Gunz, "Deja Vu: Uptown Baby"
Album: Make It Reign


What are the odds that Cory Gunz ghostwrote this for his dad at age 9?

20. "Never let me slip, cause if I slip, then I'm slippin."
Dr. Dre, "Nuthin' But a 'G' Thang"
Album: The Chronic


Aren't we glad that he eventually decided to hire some ghostwriters?

19. "When it's hot I'm duckin' them people with my firearm Look I be straight thuggin."
Turk, "Trife Livin"
Album: Young and Thuggin'


If he's the one with the firearm, why's he duckin'?

18."My paragraph alone is worth five mics (uh-huh) A twelve song LP, that's thirty-six mics (uh-huh)"
Redman "5 Boroughs"
Album: The Corruptor Soundtrack


Apparently, Redman's calculator is miles ahead of the game.

17. Don't try to treat me like I ain't famous My apologies, are you into astrology Cause I'm, I'm tryin to make it to Uranus
Kanye West, "Gettin' It In"
Album: Kiss of Death


Oh I get it: there's Libra, Sagittarius, Scorpio, and then Uranus. And you say Kanye doesn't deserve to have his image displayed next to the word 'genius' in Webster's Dictionary?

16."Hood n***a from Bankhead, I stay by Grandma Nana I lay by my banana, dumpin' and punkin' monkeys."
Young Dro, "Shoulder Lean"


With all the money T.I. makes from music and movies, you'd think he would at least invest in a decent ghostwriter for his sidekick.

15."When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets."
LFO, "Summer Girls"


Cut them some slack. These guys graduated from the prestigious Vanilla Ice Institute of Hip-Hop and decided to try their hands at random word association.

14. "Sometime y'all get crimey crimey, grimy grimy But those with a tiny hiney they get whiny whiny."
Cam'Ron, "5 Boroughs"
Album: The Corruptor Soundtrack


Someone should have informed Cam that this choppy choppy rhyme thing is silly silly.



13."I'm hungry for cheese like Hungry, Hungry Hippo."
Project Pat ("Ballers")
Album: Ghetty Green


Extra points for giving us one of the worst songs ever known to man.

12."If you don't bring back my m****f*****n money or my m***f****n dope, you can forget about Christmas n***a, cause you ain't gon even see New Years."
Master P ("Do You Know")

In Master P's universe, New Year comes right before Christmas.

11."It's like fee, fie, foe, fum, I smell the blood of a jealous a*s punk."
Prodigy ("Click Clack")
Album: Blood Money


No longer inspired by hardcore hip-hop, Prodigy turns to nursery rhymes for some equally uninspiring lyrics.

10."First family will gradually lift that a*s up like gravity."
Lil' Fame (of M.O.P.) ("Half and Half")


Sir Isaac Newton must be turning in his grave right now.

9."I like the way ya ass move to the beat You a freak, that's somethin' you can be."
J-Kwon ("Show Your A**")
Album: Hood Hop


You see, kids, that's another reason why you should stay in school.



8. "D.D.T. the b**ch, I can go for some hours. Let Parlae hit, together we like twin towers."
Pimpin ("Freaky as She Wanna Be")
Album: On Top of Our Game


A terribly humorless and tasteless joke. Enough said.

7."I like them black, white, Puerto Rican, or Haitian Like Japanese, Chinese, or even Asian."
Chingy ("Balla Baby")
Album: Powerballin'


As far as Chingy's concerned, Asian is a nationality damnit.

6."I'll break it down for you now, baby it's simple If you be a nympho, I'll be a nympho."
50 Cent ("Candy Shop")
Album: The Massacre


Well, what do you expect from an artist whose stage moniker in itself constitutes a grammatical mishap?

5."Thirty-two grams raw, chop it in half, get sixteen, double it times three. We got forty-eight, which mean a whole lot of cream Divide the profit by four, subtract it by eight We back to sixteen..."
Foxy Brown ("Affirmative Action")
Album: It Was Written


This holds the world record for worst mathematics on a song.

4."Got a Bill in my mouth like I'm Hillary Rodham."
Ali G (Grillz)
Album: Sweat/Suit


No comments.

3."Young, black, and famous, with money hanging out the anus."
Mase ("Can't Nobody Hold Me Down")
Album: No Way Out


Now, that's the type of money I definitely wouldn't want to touch before breakfast.

2."I watch my back when I'm walkin, I watch my mouth when I'm talking. My glock cocked when I'm crawling."
Mike Jones ("Scandalous H**s")
Album: Who is MIke Jones?


What's next? I watch my ears when I'm hearing, I watch my sight when I'm seeing?

1. Now you know that I'm the Queen of Miami. All that loud talkin, lyin, save that sh*t for your mammy. Sounds like "blah, blah blah, blah bla blah-blah," I'm like uh-huh (uh-huh) okay (okay), Whassup (whassup) SHUT UP!"
Trina ("Here We Go")
Album: Glamorest Life


Actual lyrics.




Can you think of any other lyrics that should be on this list?

Your thoughts...

17 comments:

PrettyBlack said...

rap a lizard in gauze...eminem, nuff said.
Kyle they realize the youngstas just want to bob their heads and don't really give a shit about whats being said...

Kingsmomma said...

LMAO!!! I had to stop talking about Nicki Minaj Fans because I was (am ) a Die Hard Trina fan and she talks about NOTHING.. But yeah that verse was classic...but it sounds better than it looks?

Oh i included Dr.Dre on my worst lyrics too. "Never let me slip, cause if I slip, then I'm slippin."
For real?

Rich Fitzgerald said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rich Fitzgerald said...

I have one that probably threw a lot of people, because it sounds right but isn't.

"I'm different, I can't base what I'm gone be off what everybody isn't" - So Ambitious, Jay Z feat. Pharrell

Hmmm. Let's think about that for a moment. So, what you are saying is that you basically want to be like everyone else while appearing to be different???

I know what he really meant, but he should have left the word "can't" out. I'm just saying.

The F$%K it List said...

I can list a gazillion and most of them are from Lil Wayne hahaha.

Great post.

Miss Mika said...

Dead @ that Ali G one. HAHAHA!!!

Here's one:

"And I like my girls with meat and not just some little boney girl. And I do like boney girls but long as they not phoney girls."

"Call Me" - Pretty Ricky

Matter of fact, every Pretty Ricky song EVER should be included in the worst rap lyrics ever category.

Charles (Illumistrations) said...

Man...you posted Jay lyrics..shame on you. But he has some more though.

'I'm out of the country but my blueberry still connect...' from What More Can I Say. I've never heard of blueberry phones before then...

She Draws said...

"I been hot since hedgehog, Sonic the
So could you pass me the keys to the Tonica
I mean Tonka, That's the truck bitches
Fuck you and fuck all of you fuck bitches"

Although I think most of what Nikki says is stupid, this is the dumbest shit I EVER HEARD.

Sincerely,

Go

She Draws said...

"I been hot since hedgehog, Sonic the
So could you pass me the keys to the Tonica
I mean Tonka, That's the truck bitches
Fuck you and fuck all of you fuck bitches"

Although I think most of what Nikki says is stupid, this is the dumbest shit I EVER HEARD.

Sincerely,

Go

Thoughtsofsoutherngal said...

This list looked familiar so I went to my friend Google. This list originally came out in 2008. That's the reason we don't see Waka and Gucci. LOL

That Trina verse may still be the worse! Then again Young Jeezy has whole songs that don't make sense.

"Standing at my podium
I'm trying watch my sodium".

Ninja, what? ninja, who?

Dar'Keith Lofton said...

"I love you like a fat kid love cake." -- 50 Cent

Does that line actually work on the bitches?

Anything regarding the Bloods gang... Lil Wayne

Where you making gang references during 500 Degrees or the first two Carter albums, Weezy?

Anything where he tries to sing/ hold the note during the punchline... Drake.

Drizzy, serrrrreiioouusssllyy???

rozay said...

blueberry aka percs smh

rozay said...

blueberry aka percs smh

rozay said...

blueberry aka percs smh

Grey Jaw Ripper said...

bout that Canibus thing......what if he meant a single density floppy and a double sided density floppy.... See single density floppy have a 360 density and double sided floppy have 720 density.... Just saying

WILLIE LAMPKIN said...

This is why I created the "Recall Wack Rappers" movement... For the real artists to get the light and get the wack rappers out of the industry.. I have shirts, tanks and more.. Sold over 200 nationwide in 2 months. RecallWackRappers.com - Facebook Page: Recall Wack Rappers

WILLIE LAMPKIN said...
This comment has been removed by the author.