cheeeatin'

Cheating...

Hmmmm...

Where do I start?

I'm sure that almost everyone reading this have either cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse, right? If not, it's safe to say that you KNOW somebody who has cheated.

I did. Wayyyyyyy back in the day in college with an old girlfriend. I told y'all that. It happened and I learned from it. Didn't get caught, tho (haaaaa)

As I've gotten older, I learned that shit happens. What I mean by that...i don't get mad when i hear about how "so and so cheated with so and so."

Cheating means different things to men and women. I can't tell you why women cheat. Can't really tell you why men cheat. And I can't speak from experience. However, I will give you some distinct perspectives.

SOME women cheat because they feel neglected. As a man, the last thing that you wanna do is to neglect your woman. If a women feels like she's giving 100% and she's being taken for granted...she may stray.

SOME men cheat because they can't help themselves. LMAO! Just kiddin. Seriously, I won't say that it's in our DNA. However, men are selfish by nature. We have been chasing women since the age of 12. We've always been told to "get as much azz as we can." We took those words to heart. LOL. Some of us are just downright greedy. For a man, I think you must have an appetite to cheat. It's just like eating. It's habit forming. Just like you have the urge to eat. If you cheat, it becomes a part of your ritual.

Honestly, I really don't know if ANY of us can say that we'd never cheat. I'm married...never cheated. I think that fair to say that I could never say never. There's an old saying..."A man is as faithful as his options." If that were true, I'd have a ton of chicks...but not as many as somebody like Kobe Bryant. I think cheating is more about situations. If you keep yourself out of certain situations, you won't cheat.

Here's the scenario...a woman will not cheat even after the man has her alone at his house. She could easily walk away.

Now...if you put a man in the same situation...you'll get a different result. If you put a nekkid woman in front of a man that he's attracted to...he's gonna splack (lmao)...i mean have sex. The only nekkid woman that should be in front of a man to keep him faithful should be a shoe model (aka stripper) haaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Cheating...your thoughts

Hollatchaboi!

giveit2mebaby

Disclaimer...
The thoughts expressed in the post are the strictly by the author of this post. They contain graphic and sexually explicit content. If you're reading this at work, you may wanna stop right here b/c I don't wanna get you fired. LOL. If you're easily offended or extremely "hot and bothered" (as the old people say)...stop right here. If not...proceed!


Today, I'm gonna talk about something that we ALL can relate to...sex.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that if you're reading this post, you've had sex at least once in your lifetime. You may have called it sex. You may have called it what others call it...

sex, fuckin, bonin, screwing, humping, hunching, shagging, getting your back blown out, hitting, punchin', getting broke off, chopped and screwed, making love, getting tapped, knockin' boots, bangin', getting some trim, nut bustin, or splacking (my personal favorite term from back in the day).

Whatever you wanna call it...we all do it. And MOST of us enjoy it. We are the most sexual creatures on the earth. Why do we love sex? Well, that would depend on who you ask. Let's take a deeper look at sex.

1. Men view sex different from the way that women view sex:
Duhhhhh. That's like saying that "an elephant is heavy." In general, men think about sex probably more than they think about anything else. It's natural. The reason why I say it's natural because we've been thinking about sex since we were like 13 yrs old. We gotta have it. LOL. Seriously, we just don't view it the same way that women do. When a man meets a woman, his thoughts will ultimately lead to how soon he can get her nekkid so that he can knock the boots. A woman may meet a man and be thinking about how nice he is...how cute he is...how smart he is...yadda yadda yadda. For men, we'll put a instant clock in our head as to "how long it MITE take before we can hit it." Ladies, if you don't believe me...ask your man about what he thought about you before y'all became a couple. LMAO!!!

2. Women know within the first 7-10 mins whether or not they will sleep with a man:
MOST women...not all women...but most of em know if and when it's gonna go down. Sometimes, it depends on what the man says or doesn't say. I've had female friends tell me about how they were gonna bone the dude but he said something stupid and ruined it for her.

3. Men and women view sex on the first night different:
Some women think that men think that they are a slut if they splack on the 1st night. Wrong. I mean...doesn't it take 2 people to have sex? If she's a slut for having sex on the 1st night...then what is he? A stud? That's bullshit. Men don't care about that. What men DO care about is whether on not she has sex on the first night with him, Joe, Kevin, Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky, and Mike.

4. Orgasms count:
As a man, you had BETTA make sure that she has an orgasm! You hear more and more women complaining about NOT having one. That's up to the fellas. We gotta get them there. Or you might not get a returned phone call. However, it's just as important for the woman to make sure that the man "bust a nut". If he doesn't, I can promise you that he won't call you back.

5. Orgasms = love or Orgasms = lust
Ever notice how SOME women fall in love after sex? He blew your back out and now you want to be his girl? Why? Did you want to be his girl before y'all had sex? Was that even discussed? Just because he made your eyes roll in the back of your head and had you shivering like a 3 yr old standing outside on a 30 degree day doesn't mean that you love him. You lust him. Or maybe you love how he twisted you? But don't get it confused, you don't love him.

On the contrary, I've seen dudes just get pussy whipped after sex. I mean, I've seen dudes just disappear after gettin' some good trim. LOL. But it ain't love. Orgasms are great but they don't lead to love. Quiet frankly, some of us have been with people who could ONLY give us a good orgasm and not a good 5 minute stimulating conversation.

6. Let's be fuck buddies:
Bad move. If you ever decide to JUST have sex with a person and become their fuck buddy, you're wasting your time. That doesn't work. "We can have sex but have no emotional ties to each other." Bullshit. What you're saying is..."I wanna hump you and everybody else but I don't wanna stop humping you just yet." People forget that sex is an emotional act. It's almost impossible to have sex with somebody and not feel SOMETHING for them. You may not be in love with them but you care. The only people who can have non emotional sex are porn stars and prostitutes...and I don't think y'all fall into that category.

7. Explore your inner freak
We're all freaks. I'ma freak. You're a freak. He's a freak. And she's a freak. Don't be afraid to try new stuff. You never know...you just might like it.

8. Sex sells
Sex sells and sex pays. Remember that. If you do things, you'll be rewarded. Fellas, take out the trash and clean the garage and watch to see what happens. LMAO!!!

9. Be open
Men and women must always be open to their partners needs and desires. Communication is the key.

10. When in doubt...when you're pissed off...fuck
Ladies, always take advantage of morning wood! LMAO!!!


I'ma stop right here. At this point, I don't know what the hell y'all gonna say about this.

iwannbewithu

I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.

JFresh: "You're ready to do this?"

Me: "Yeah man. I know I'm ready"

JFresh: "You're gonna have to sign that contract. You know...that's what a marriage certificate is. It's a contract. It ain't like the contract that you signed for you job. You can't get outta this contract. How much does a marriage license cost?"

Me: "Ten bucks."

JFresh: "It'll cost you a lot more to get out of that contract."


I remember that conversation. It was nearly 9 yrs ago. Just before I got married.

J is a smart dude. Single. No kids. I've known him since we were 6. He was in my wedding. I'll be in his...if it ever happens. Probably won't ever happen. He's not looking to get married. He's not looking for a commitment from a woman.

Commitment- the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself...the state or act of committing

Many people say that it's hard for men AND women to commit. Why? Not really sure. These are some possibilities...

1. Loosing out
If you commit to a relationship or a marriage, you lose out on all of the men or women that you COULD be with. For instance, by getting married...I've given up on ALL of the women all over the world who want me!! Because all of the women want me...right? LMAO! You get my point

2. Fear of the unknown
Men (in general) run from this fear. They've heard horror stories about how a woman changes after she becomes your main girl or wife. That fear almost cripples someones mental state. I've heard stories about dudes who had sex all the time before they got married. Once the ring was put on her finger, the sex slowed down. I've also heard stories from women who have had men who went from being driven and hard working to lazy bums

3. Lost friends
Some people think that when you are in a comitted relationship you're supposed to rid yourself of your friends. Not true. Should you put your friends before your lover? No. Should you put the person who you're comitted to before your friends? Depends on who you ask


I could go on and on but you get my point. I think almost all of us want to commit to someone. And we want that person to be just as committed to us in return. One of the great benefits of being committed is that you get to share some great times and bad times with one person. And that makes the bond stronger.

What about you? Your thoughts on your commitment or desires to have one.

Hollatchaboi.

off tha dome

random thoughts...

They say it's better to have lost love than to have never loved at all.

Bullshit...love hurts! LoL

Can we get tha gas prices back down to $1.50?

I have like 600 channels on Directv but I only watch 10 of em.

A relationship is about being committed to the committment

We miss you Mike. I'ma moonwalk tonight JUST for you.

Life can be easy at times...but WE make it complicated.

Memo to Prez O...work on that pitching, bruh. That pitch that you threw the other night at the All Star Game was WEAK.

Don't you just hate those folk that come around only when they want something?

Speaking of Prez O...I was in DC over the weekend with the fam. I tried to hit him up on Blackberry Messenger but no dice. Hey Prez O...send me your PIN, fam. We need to catch up.

Much thanks to Russ and LRenee for a great weekend. Gotta do it again...soon!

#7 is back on them streetz! Will/should the NFL Commissioner let him back in the League? Whut do U think?

I don't care how fine the fellas say Toya and Tiny's bodies are...I'm not watching their show. BET gets no love from me

Memo to Sprint...if this new phone don't work...I'm done with y'all. The iphone is only a click away.

Is it REALLY hard to date in 2009?

I think I'm gonna do a week of posts about relationships. Whut do u think?

I want some strawberry ice cream

Nuff respect to Skip Gates. I'm glad that you handled the racial profiling from the police with class. This incident show how far we STILL have to go when it concerns race relations.

Monica...Monica...Monica

it's in the game

I didn't ask for this shit.

I really didn't. I mean...I never thought it'd be like this.

When I was in college, I just had to worry about going to class and playing ball. Hell...I didn't NEED to go to class. Once the professor found out who I was and that I played ball, I knew I could pass that class. But I'm no dummy.

I went to class. I'm no dumb jock. I didn't major in Basket Weaving 101 like some of my teammates. I majored in marine bology.

People looked at me and thought that I wasn't smart until I opened my mouth and blew them away.

I handled college well...I dealt with the chicks and autograph seekers. Never had a steady girlfriend. Why should I? I could have any woman...any color...on our campus. I was the big man on campus. Everybody knew me. As my game became better on the court...more attention came. Then came the calls, emails, and text msgs from the agents. That was annoying.

I hate doing interviews but my college coach told me that I had to "play the game" with the media. They can make or break you.

Things are different now. I'm in the pros now. This ain't what I thought it'd be. Don't get me wrong...it's fun but not lilke I thought it'd be. College was the time of my life when i was playing ball. This is just a business.

I have to deal with agents, marketing reps, lawyers. I also have to deal with groupies and hanger on dudes. The groupies are unreal. They are everywhere. They are in every city and at every party that I go to. Most of them are willing to "do whatever it takes" to snag a baller like me. I don't need that baby drama in my life. I want to have kids one day. But I also want to be married and committed to one woman.

I've slept with more women than I'd care to admit to. I always protect myself but I need to stop doing what I'm doing.

Sometimes I feel like I'm caught in the middle of some "social pyramid." I mean, I'd like to hang at clubs and listen to hip hop with people who are my age but I don't want to have to fear for my life in that type of scene. I have the income and the "status" to party with the "suits" but I don't feel comfortable around those people for long periods of time. Some of them respect me more for my athletic prowess than my intelligence. So, I feel like I'm in the middle sometimes.

Y'all just don't understand. You only see what I do athletically. You see the fame and the millions that I make. You don't see me for who I am. Some of you see me as a piece of meat. I'm here to entertain you. I'm not. I'm here to play a sport b/c that's what I love to do...well...what I used to love to do. It's just a business now.

What if your salary was published in a newspaper where everybody knew how much money you made?

What if your successes and failures at work were publicly scrutinized on a daily basis?

What if you didn't want the spotlight because you knew it'd burn the hell outta you?

My life is your entertainment.

Can it be that it was all so simple then?

I didn't ask for this shit.

thoughts from your favorite pro athlete

two fingaz

Peace…it’s ova. Chuckdadeuces at the state of Minnesota. As many of you know, I have spent the last 4 months doing contract work for a company that was located in Minneapolis. The assignment is now over and I’m back in Atlanta. It was a great experience. I had my apprehensions at first. I mean, I had prayed for the job and the Lord heard my prayer but I didn’t expect that the job would take me away from my family. But it worked out. The company paid for me to fly back to Atlanta on the weekends, hotel suite, rental car, and per diem. So, I can’t complain. The job paid well and that’s ALWAYS a good thing. I’m glad to be back home. There’s nothing betta than being with your family. I missed em. The next assignment starts in a few weeks but it’ll be here…and that’s a good thing.



I was glad that I didn’t see Minnesota in the winter time. However, the weather there is very strange. When I got there in March, it was 65 degrees. Three days later…it snowed. In fact, the last day that we saw snow was April 15. I will miss those 80 degree summer days. While y’all were dealing with the brutal summer heat or the endless rainy days, we had very good weather. Gotta give a shout out to fellow bloggers Arafasse and Sexxy Luv. Sorry we didn’t get a chance to link up. Maybe next time. It was good kickin it in your city, tho.

Here’s a couple of things that I learned while I was there…

Minnesota does have black people. I was under the impression that we weren’t there but we are. Not like New York, Atlanta or Houston but we’re there.

Even though there was somebody who cleaned my room every day, I would make sure that I didn’t leave my room messy before I went to work. I know... it’s strange.

Club Seven is nice

Minneapolis might be one of the most liberal places that you’ll find. Race doesn’t seem to be an issue. It has to be the capital for interracial relationships. Almost EVERYBODY is in a interracial relationship.

Mall of America. What can I say about this place. It's HUGE. You could literally spend the entire day there. I'll be the first to admit that I hate malls. I never spend more than an hour in a mall and I hate crowds. But this place is a must see. Six levels (i think) of stores, stores, and more stores. I found myself at the Mall of America several times despite my disdain for malls. I enjoyed the MOA. Pics were taken from the foot court...

AJs Chicken & Fish on Lake Street...My favorite wing spot in the Twin Cities. This place had wings that were better than any wing spot in Atlanta. The spot is owned by a Serbian dude. Go figure.

The Vikings fans really want Brett Favre to play for them. Not sure why?!? The Minnesota Timberwolves are in disarray (drafting all of those point guards). The Minnesota Twins fans are looking forward to playing in the new stadium (Target Field). Unlike their current stadium, they’ll be playing outside.

I didn't go fishing. In fact, I caused a huge raucus in the office when I made the confession that despite having grown up in the state of South Carolina, I've never been fishing. After I said that, everybody was trying to take me out on a nearby lake. In the land of 10,000 lakes...I bypassed all of em.

I had some “interesting co-workers”. I saw a lotta crazy stuff. It’s interesting to see what folks will do when they are way from home. (gotta blog on it next time)

Shout out to the fellaz that hooped with me at LA Fitness in St. Paul.

The last two things I learned…I already knew but they were re-enforced even more…

I have a great wife. She really held it down while I was gone. Not only did she have to deal with our 3 lil ones but the every day drama at work. Not to mention, running around…taking Deion to baseball practice…etc. Keeping the house in order and then only being able to see me on the weekends. Sometimes I’d be home every other weekend and I know that had to be tough. But that’s what she is…tough. Strong black woman. If the shoe were on the other foot and she left and I had to do it all…I dunno if I could have done what she did. Period. I’m thankful and blessed to have her.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Nuff said

Kyle

Rare Air

I'm gonna offer a different perspective of Steve McNair. I want to tell you some things that you may or may not know about the man. I never had the opportunity to meet the man but I knew of him quite well. My former college teammate, Anthony Cook, was drafted in the same year as McNair by the Houston Oilers. They were teammates for several years. Another good friend, Eddie Robinson, Jr, played several years with McNair and was on the team that McNair led to the Super Bowl. McNair and I also graduated the same year. His school, Alcorn State, never played my school, South Carolina State but I followed his career. I felt like I knew him. In the game of football, there's a brotherhood. You don't have to be on the same team but we all share a bond. Nevertheless, I knew Steve McNair.

I knew Steve McNair as Air McNair

I knew Steve McNair was a helluva quarterback

I knew Steve McNair gained more than 6000 yds rushing and passing and threw for 53 touchdowns during his senior year.

I knew Steve McNair was the highest draft pick to come from a HBCU.

I knew Steve McNair led the way for the current crop of black quarterbacks in the NFL. When he entered the NFL, some media referred to him as a "black quarterback". When was the last time you've heard somebody refer to Donovan McNabb's skin color.

I knew that Steve McNair played the violent game of football in pain. He played hurt...a lot.

I knew that Steve McNair ALMOST won a Super Bowl on a great last drive.


I don't know Steve McNair.

I don't know about why Steve McNair was "dating" this 20 yr old woman.

I don't know what kinda marital problems Steve McNair was having.

I don't know what kinda husband or father Steve McNair was.

I don't know why Steve McNair was cheating.

One thing I do know...it ain't my none of my damn business! And it ain't yours, either! For the past few days, I've listened to this man's name be degraded, judged and dragged through the mud by many people who have done the same thing. Even if you've never cheated, no one should pass judgement on the man. Steve McNair didn't kill himself. He was murdered in cold blood. He was the VICTIM.

Infidelity does not normally lead to death. Over the past few days, I've listened to people say things that have really pissed me off. Steve didn't ask to be murdered. Steve's infidelity should not have taken him off this earth. You could say that the infidelity was a by-product that led to his death but McNair didn't deserve this. McNair's legacy will be what he did on the field and his charitable contributions off the field. His legacy will not be about some young, crazy woman who didn't think much about her life nor his. Keep this in mind, Steve McNair was MURDERED by somebody who he trusted. And there have been some to suggest that he "brought this on himself." That's bullshit. It does't matter what you think about his decisions to date a 20 year old waitress despite being a married man with 4 sons. He's dead and there ain't no coming back from that.

I don't think this will serve as a lesson to men (or women) who cheat. Magic Johnson got HIV in '91 and yet there are STILL people have babies by 3 or 4 different baby mammas. The lesson here is that you must be careful of the company that you keep...male or female.

Shame on those of you who are throwing stones. Steve McNair was somebody's father, son, brother, uncle, cousin, friend, teammate, frat brother, and yes...husband. They will mourn him forever when this story is no longer a headline.

I may have pissed some of you off with this post. If i did...good! Put the stone down. You don't know Steve McNair

I do.