I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.
JFresh: "You're ready to do this?"
Me: "Yeah man. I know I'm ready"
JFresh: "You're gonna have to sign that contract. You know...that's what a marriage certificate is. It's a contract. It ain't like the contract that you signed for you job. You can't get outta this contract. How much does a marriage license cost?"
Me: "Ten bucks."
JFresh: "It'll cost you a lot more to get out of that contract."
I remember that conversation. It was nearly 9 yrs ago. Just before I got married.
J is a smart dude. Single. No kids. I've known him since we were 6. He was in my wedding. I'll be in his...if it ever happens. Probably won't ever happen. He's not looking to get married. He's not looking for a commitment from a woman.
Commitment- the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself...the state or act of committing
Many people say that it's hard for men AND women to commit. Why? Not really sure. These are some possibilities...
1. Loosing out
If you commit to a relationship or a marriage, you lose out on all of the men or women that you COULD be with. For instance, by getting married...I've given up on ALL of the women all over the world who want me!! Because all of the women want me...right? LMAO! You get my point
2. Fear of the unknown
Men (in general) run from this fear. They've heard horror stories about how a woman changes after she becomes your main girl or wife. That fear almost cripples someones mental state. I've heard stories about dudes who had sex all the time before they got married. Once the ring was put on her finger, the sex slowed down. I've also heard stories from women who have had men who went from being driven and hard working to lazy bums
3. Lost friends
Some people think that when you are in a comitted relationship you're supposed to rid yourself of your friends. Not true. Should you put your friends before your lover? No. Should you put the person who you're comitted to before your friends? Depends on who you ask
I could go on and on but you get my point. I think almost all of us want to commit to someone. And we want that person to be just as committed to us in return. One of the great benefits of being committed is that you get to share some great times and bad times with one person. And that makes the bond stronger.
What about you? Your thoughts on your commitment or desires to have one.