that's why she DON'T have a man

"Mannnnn, if a woman is over 30...college educated...attractive...smart...has a good job...has her own crib...no kids...and DOESN'T have a man...SHE IS CRAZY!!!"

When I heard Paul say those words, I paused for a second. It caught me off guard. Before I could reply, he added...

"Even if she has a kid or kids...and no man??? You KNOW she CRAZY!!!!"

The circle of dudes all burst into laughter. I chuckled at Paul...not because of what he said...but because of how he said it and his strong Brooklyn accent. He's a funny dude. Was he correct? Not even close. 

For some reason, we all seem to succumb to society's definition of what or who we should be. You've all heard it before. We all should be married with children and a career by a certain age. And for some reason, we fall into the trap of that realm of thinking. Who wants to be defined by a few people? I don't think anybody should want that. 

Back to Paul's statement. I could have corrected him. But who am I to tell him that women ain't crazy. I know he's dealt with a few crazy women. LOL. Seriously, you have to look deeper into it...

Maybe she's single because...she's not ready for a relationship

Maybe she's single because...she is focused on her career and doesn't have time to devote to dating nor a relationship

Maybe she's single because...she just got out of a relationship

Maybe she's single because...she is waiting for Mr. Right

Maybe she's single because...she has watched her girlfriends run down the aisle and not be ready for marriage and she refuses to become a statistic

Maybe she's single because...she is afraid of committing

Maybe she's single because...she actually enjoys being single and not having to "answer" to a man

Maybe she's single because...she likes traveling the globe and she can't handle a long distance relationship

Maybe she's single because...she thinks all of the good men are engaged or married

Maybe she's single because...she knows that a lot of male egos will be bothered by her degrees and six figure salary

Maybe she's single because...she is tired of dealing with trifling men who don't know what they want...but know they want sex...but don't want a commitment...but don't want her with another man.

Now...Paul could have been right. Maybe she is crazy...but i think it's probably one of the reasons that I listed more than it is her being crazy. 

25 to life

Marriage. Most of us who don't have it...would like to see it one day. Some want to be married tomorrow. LOL. Marriage is a lotta hard work. Prior to marriage, one must have effective communication about their goals and ambitions about marriage. The good folks at WebMd sent me this article and i thought i'd pass it along.

Before you walk down the aisle, ask the questions that really matter. Dr. Robin Smith shares 25 questions from her book, Lies at the Altar


Work Questions

1. Are you working in your chosen profession?

2. How many hours a week do you work?

3. What is your dream job?

4.What is your retirement plan? What do you plan to do when you stop working?

5. What does your job entail? (For example: Do you often travel for business, work at home or perform dangerous tasks?)

Money Questions

6. What is your annual income?

7. Should individuals within a marriage have separate bank accounts in addition to joint accounts?

8. Do you have significant debts?

9. Do you believe in establishing a family budget?

10. How important is it for you to make a lot of money?

Sex Questions

11. What sexual activities do you enjoy most? Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable? Be specific!

12.Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? If yes, why? If no, why?

13.What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?

14. How often do you need or expect sex?

15. Is sexual fidelity an absolute necessity in a good marriage?

Parenthood Questions

16. Do you want children? When? How many? Are you unable to have children?

17. Do you believe that children should be raised with some religious or spiritual foundation?

18. How important is it to you that your children are raised near your extended family?

19. Do you believe in spanking a child? What type of discipline do you believe in (time outs, standing in the corner, taking away privileges, etc.)?

20. Should boys be treated the same as girls? Should they have the same rules for conduct? Should you have the same expectations for their sexual behavior?

Religion Questions

21. Do you believe in God? What does that mean to you?

22. Do you have a current religious affiliation? Is it a big part of your life?

23. Does your religion impose any behavioral restrictions (dietary, social, familial, sexual) that would affect your partner?

24. How important is it to you for your partner to share your religious beliefs?

25. How important is it to you for your children to be raised in your religion?


i think that these questions are relevant...even if you're married b/c you have to stay on the same page.

these are great questions to have for someone that you're dating or on a date with.

your thoughts??? how do you think your man/woman would answer some of these questions?

hollatchaboi!!!!