Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts

Monday, August 22, 2016

phone jerk



I found this article on a website about cell phones. Very interesting. Do you fall under any of these categories? Are you a phone jerk?

1. Multitasking While Driving

Nothing about driving disturbs me more than when people text and drive. It's dangerous and inconsiderate and costs the lives of far too many innocent people each year. Studies says that texting (or being otherwise engrossed in your iPhone) is equivalent to driving drunk, and I believe it.

The most dangerous thing is the people who do it so often that they are overly confident in their abilities to do it "safely." Overconfidence is a killer when it comes to surfing your iPhone and driving. And it's not as if it's the rare person who uses their phone while driving. I'll sit at an intersection and watch the cars drive by, and in many cases, most of the drivers that speed obliviously past are in some way actively and visibly preoccupied with their smartphones. Smartphones are becoming a leading cause of auto accidents and we can all practice being more considerate and safe by not driving while preoccupied with our iPhones.

2. Using Your iPhone at Movie Theaters, Weddings, and Funerals

Certain situations are just not appropriate for having your head buried in your smartphone. Movies, weddings, and funerals top the list, and you can add churches, synagogues, and other religious institutions to the list if so inclined. These are the kinds of places that, despite your innocent intentions, you are likely to frowned upon and possibly even called out for using your device.

You're especially likely to have someone say something to you in a theater, where the darkened environment is an important part of the ambiance and a cell phone screen lighting up the room can spoil the moment. If you must use your phone in a theater, be discreet; put your jacket over your shoulder and hide your phone at your side when you use it, and don't try to do a bunch of texting or emailing in the dark.

3. Taking Pictures and Videos of Everything

Not everyone wants to be caught on film, and not everyone appreciates your efforts to capture every moment on video or photo. If you want to capture the moment, sometimes video is more discreet, whereas asking people to freeze and pose for stills can sometimes be the most distracting and disruptive thing you can do. Remember, you can always go back to a discreetly filmed video and take screenshots of still images. If you can't resist taking a lot of pictures of people and events all the time, at least keep your camera shutter sound on mute if you don't want to drive people crazy.

4. Being an Information Addict

This one also fits me to a T. If anyone says something that I find interesting, I'm going to want Google it. And if someone says something I question the veracity or authenticity of, you better believe I'll be wanting to hop on my iPhone to search for reference. In fact, Siri and I are a great team when it comes to investigating and questioning the accuracy of any statement. However, not everyone appreciates this trait. In fact, it can be perceived as downright annoying and obnoxious. Unless someone asks you a specific question, I'd advise refraining from jumping on your iPhone to fact-check every chance you get.

5. Checking Out While You're Checked Out

Whether you work as a cashier or you are in line and it's your turn to have your goods rung up, it's not just polite to not be on your smartphone, but it's considerate too, as it keeps the line moving efficiently. So often I'll observe people with their heads down, wrapped up in something on their iPhone, oblivious to the fact that cashier is waiting for them, and then they have to fumble for their wallet, rather than being prepared for the inevitable fact that they are expected to be paying for their goods now.

6. Spending Family Time with Your iPhone Out

When you are around friends and family it's tempting not to be absorbed in your iPhone; after all, these are the people you are likely most comfortable around. But at the end of the day, moments with loved ones are precious and all too fleeting. When you are spending time with people who are important to you, show them you care by not being preoccupied with your iPhone or iPad. This may seem self evident, but if you're the parent of a teenager, then you probably already know how hard it is to convince your kids to take their eyes off their devices. And as any psychologist will tell you, kids learn from the adults in their lives, and that includes their smartphone habits.

7. Not Speaking to Your Audience

Avoid "SMS talk" (abbreviations like brb, smh, ttyl, etc.) when communicating with folks who you aren't certain will understand it. It can be perceived as disrespectful since you are, in essence, speaking in a different language and assuming they'll understand, when in reality, they may have no idea what you are saying. This is especially true for younger folks communicating with older folks. It's a good practice to communicate in a way that the person you are communicating with can understand without having to ask Siri for translation.

8. Not Double Checking Before Sending

Do you have the right recipient in the address bar? Nothing can be potentially more embarrassing than sending an email or text to the wrong person.

Also, use your spell check for both spelling AND grammar; people shouldn't have to struggle to decipher what you really meant, especially when you are the obvious victim of autocorrect. Not to mention proper spelling and grammar are definitely important in professional and academic situations.

9. Finally, We All Get Busy, But...

If your iPhone is set to notify senders when you read their messages, try to reply in a timely fashion. If replying quickly isn't your style, you may want to consider turning off that feature in general settings or using 3D Touch to avoid triggering a read receipt. Regardless, even if you turn off your notify sender when read feature, it's still good form to reply as promptly as possible. Just because the days of phone calls and voice mails are becoming history doesn't mean that punctual response times are any less important or appreciated.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

how to survive a relationship in the world of social media...





While I was doing some research for last night's 12 Radio Show, I came across this article. Pretty interesting if you ask me. I have highlighted my thoughts in red...

With our quick paced, technology driven world, is it possible to have and build a lasting relationship? The answer is yes but you have to follow these key rules.

1. Never have arguments online - Your business is your business and the world should not be involved every time you and your partner gets into a spats. This causes unwanted attention and advice. It can also add fuel to the fire. A fight that can be easily fixed can turn into world war 3 because you let in unwanted troops. My mom always use to tell me no one should know 100 percent of your relationship, the good or the bad. Telling the wrong people the wrong things can set your relationship up for failure. | I've seen a few of these play out on twitter and Facebook. All I did was grab my popcorn. This should NEVER happen. People make certain assumptions about your relationships by what you say (or don't say) on social media. You have to understand that you can't control that. The minute that you have an argument online...everybody knows that you've been "frontin'" and there is trouble in paradise. 


2. Talk to each other - Put down the phones, get off of Facebook, Twitter and Instagram and talk to each other. Get to know each other. Ask questions, dig deep to see if this person is who you want to be with. Communication is one of the biggest factors in a successful relationship. You cannot talk with a cell phone or tablet glued to your face. If there is a problem talk about it. Ask about your partners day. Find out there likes and dislikes. Become an active listener and communicator. This is essential in building a strong foundation. | I've struggled with this from time to time...honestly. I like being connected to the world. But sometimes you gotta put the phone down. If not, bring them into what you're reading or looking at on the phone or computer.

3. Explore - Have date nights and explore the world around you. Put the phone away for an hour or two. You are not going to miss a thing trust me. Do a technology free date night. Try out that trendy new restaurant downtown. If that’s not your thing try out indoor rock climbing or a murder mystery dinner. Events that requires you two in interact far beyond the physical. Building a bond and finding out things that you two can share together. | Date nights are a must. Make them whenever you can. Get out and live life. See new things. Never be afraid to step outside of the box. 

4. Stop lurking - It is cool to still like pictures but once you are in a serious relationship stop lurking on your ex’s page or other potential mates. It is disrespectful. | Not cool. Not cool at all. Why would you do that? Are you THAT lame? 

5. Trust - Yes you should stop lurking but if someone likes a picture don’t act like you caught them sleeping in your bed with another person. Ground and surround your relationship in trust. You know the person you are with and if they really want to be with you they will never do anything to intentionally hurt you. | A relationship without trust is like a car without wheels. You're not going anywhere

6. Stop doing things for likes - Life is not based on the opinion of others. They do not go to sleep with you. They don’t pay your bills. They have no factor on your life. So, who cares if a status or a picture gets a 100 likes. Those likes are not putting any money in your pocket. Social Media should not display every aspect of your relationship. Every time you kiss, you should not have to make an announcement. | Remember back in the day when your momma told you "whatever happens in this house...stays in this house!" Same thing applies here. Every detail of your life...especially personal stuff...isn't meant for public consumption. I share a lot on this blog...but you don't know my deepest darkest secrets. Some things just aren't meant for everybody to know. Period. 

In short, Keep your relationship to yourself. Guard it and protect it. 


A relationship can be complicated to understand between the two people who are involved in it. You only complicate things when you bring others...especially nosey people in it. 

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Dating & Relationships (good, bad, & ugly)





Check out the 12 RADIO SHOW. The 12 RADIO SHOW is the most innovative and interactive show on Blog Talk Radio. Tune in tonight at 9pm EST as the host, 12kyle, informs and entertains! Don't just listen to the show...be a part of the show and participate in the interactive chat room...or call in to speak with 12kyle and his co-hosts.

TOPIC - Dating & Relationships (Good, Bad, & Ugly) co-hosted by MzKayotic. Join us for an entertaining and comical look at dating and relationships. You don't want to miss this show!

You can listen online (www.blogtalkradio.com/12kyle) or via phone (347)215-7162. Press #1 if you want to speak to the host. You can also send tweets if you want to have your questions answered or comments to @12kyle

Follow the show on twitter: @12RadioShow. Also follow the host 12kyle on twitter: @12kyle

Friday, February 1, 2013

press send




I have a question for you...

How many text messages do you send in a day?

How many personal emails do you send in day?

How many Facebook posts do you make in a day?

How many times do you comment on someones Facebook page or "LIKE" their status in day?

How many tweets do you send in a day?

If you stopped and calculated these numbers, you'd see that they are alot higher than you thought they would be. While you're in the process of sending these messages, do you ever stop and process the messages YOU are sending?

Have you ever 'vented' in a text, email or social media? Do you remember what you said?

The reason why I ask is that I don't think most people stop to think about the information that they are putting out into the atmosphere. And I see it daily. The Facebook rants. The twitter tirades. Most are riddled with nonsense with no thought behind it. Just venom. In this day of social media and all access, you have to be careful about the information that you put out there. Communication is not just about talking...its also about how the information is received. For example, what would you think if I posted the following on Facebook or Twitter or this blog...

"I'm so tired of this her and this bullshit."

You would assume that I am talking about my wife and you'd assume that there are problems in my house. I see this type of stuff every day. From the rants about people's personal life, the rants about baby momma/baby daddy issues, the Self Loathing that Dluvhall talked about the other day, and just the overall nonsense. Sometimes, i have to step back and ask myself "Did they read what they just wrote?" And with the popularity of sites like Instagram, some folks REALLY don't think twice about what they post. I'm very cautious about the pictures that I post...particularly of my kids because they are kids. At certain age, people won't see pictures them online anywhere. But that's just me. I won't even get into these public figures who say something in a tweet only to regret it later. Then comes the public apology or the claim that their account was "hacked"

While I can't tell anybody what to say in any text, email, tweet, or Facebook post...I will ask that you THINK before you press SEND

Once it's said...it's said. Everything ain't meant for public consumption

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

lemmetalk2yuh

com⋅mu⋅ni⋅ca⋅tion

[kuh-myoo-ni-key-shuhn]

1. the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs.

2. the act or process of communicating; fact of being communicated.

3. something imparted, interchanged, or transmitted.

4. a document or message imparting news, views, information, etc.


We're bad when it comes to communicating. We really are. When I say we...I mean...you and me. Men and women. Just bad. And we have to do a better job. Period. I was thinking about this after co-hosting on Jaded NYer's show on blog talk radio on Monday Night. We had a spirited conversation about some of the many differences between men and women. One of the things that was quite evident is that there is a breakdown in communication as to how members of the opposite sex relate to each other. Communication is a two way street. Let's remember the definition...the imparting or interchange of thoughts, opinions, or information by speech, writing, or signs.

For example, I asked Jaded NYer, Eb the Celeb, Smarty Jones, and The F$%k It List if they would ever approach a man who they found attractive. They all said no. I can respect that b/c there are some real weirdos out there. However, I contend that if you're not willing to approach a man and if you are defensive/stand off-ish when a man approaches you...you've broken the lines communication before anything could have been established. And yes...I understand that some men DON'T know how to approach women correctly. I think we need to do a better job of doing that and understanding that you can't approach every woman the same way. But men do like to be approached! If you don't believe me...ask any male blogger...Eclectik, Rich, Keith, Torrance, Charles, Dessex, 3rd Deadline, Cnlmike, Rashan Jamal, Super Dave Van Buren, Darius Williams, Stew, Swag, Verbal Arteest, Second 68 (that's all the male bloggers who I know b/c it's only like 20 of us...lol). Or you can ask any man. He'll tell you

Also, I think we don't do a great job of communicating after the APPROACH has been established. For example, ladies...if you're not feeling a guy...don't give him your number! I'm always amazed at how some women who I know will complain about how some dude is blowin' their phone up. Helllooooooo, you gave him the number!!! Giving your phone number is a YES. For men, we're looking a series of confirmations (YES STATEMENTS) that will help us get closer to you.

Can I have your number?...YES

Can I call you sometime?...YES

Do you have a man (she answers no)?...YES

Do you want a man?...YES

Can we go out on a date?...YES

If the scenario plays out like this, then the female may view this totally different than a man would. In a man's mind, if he can get this from you...he's at 3rd base already! I think that's where some lines of communication are broken. These are just 2 examples. I think whether we're in a committed relationship, or marriage we have to be mindful about what we say as well as how it is being interpreted. Say what you mean...mean what you say.

Keep in mind that I'm not a relationship doctor...i just play one on tv.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

25 to life


Marriage. Most of us who don't have it...would like to see it one day. Some want to be married tomorrow. LOL. Marriage is a lotta hard work. Prior to marriage, one must have effective communication about their goals and ambitions about marriage. The good folks at WebMd sent me this article and i thought i'd pass it along.


Before you walk down the aisle, ask the questions that really matter. Dr. Robin Smith shares 25 questions from her book, Lies at the Altar


Work Questions

1. Are you working in your chosen profession?

2. How many hours a week do you work?

3. What is your dream job?

4.What is your retirement plan? What do you plan to do when you stop working?

5. What does your job entail? (For example: Do you often travel for business, work at home or perform dangerous tasks?)

Money Questions

6. What is your annual income?

7. Should individuals within a marriage have separate bank accounts in addition to joint accounts?

8. Do you have significant debts?

9. Do you believe in establishing a family budget?

10. How important is it for you to make a lot of money?

Sex Questions

11. What sexual activities do you enjoy most? Are there specific sexual acts that make you uncomfortable? Be specific!

12.Do you feel comfortable initiating sex? If yes, why? If no, why?

13.What do you need in order to be in the mood for sex?

14. How often do you need or expect sex?

15. Is sexual fidelity an absolute necessity in a good marriage?

Parenthood Questions

16. Do you want children? When? How many? Are you unable to have children?

17. Do you believe that children should be raised with some religious or spiritual foundation?

18. How important is it to you that your children are raised near your extended family?

19. Do you believe in spanking a child? What type of discipline do you believe in (time outs, standing in the corner, taking away privileges, etc.)?

20. Should boys be treated the same as girls? Should they have the same rules for conduct? Should you have the same expectations for their sexual behavior?

Religion Questions

21. Do you believe in God? What does that mean to you?

22. Do you have a current religious affiliation? Is it a big part of your life?

23. Does your religion impose any behavioral restrictions (dietary, social, familial, sexual) that would affect your partner?

24. How important is it to you for your partner to share your religious beliefs?

25. How important is it to you for your children to be raised in your religion?


i think that these questions are relevant...even if you're married b/c you have to stay on the same page.

these are great questions to have for someone that you're dating or on a date with.

your thoughts??? how do you think your man/woman would answer some of these questions?

hollatchaboi!!!!