it's been a minute since I've been single and on the dating scene.
my single friends always tell me that "the game done changed" since I was dating.
maybe it has but the game is the game, right???
the following transcript was an email that I got from my boy Gee...who is single.
Yo!
I met this 29 year old chick. Smart. Average looks. We chat on and off...but more off.
I hit her up to come over and watch a movie with me and some neighbors.
And she tripped!
She said "a real gentleman takes a woman out when he is courting her!"
WTF????
We text off and on!! Court what??? When was it against the rules to watch a movie among friends? Did I miss something?
I don't even know her last name!!! And she is actually mad about it. Whutchu think man?
glad i ain't single, Gee. If I was single...I wouldn't be single.
Hmmmm I dunno. Was she uncomfortable with going to some guys house she does not know? Or is she really wanting someone to take her out? Hmmm, can we just go dutch to the movies?
ReplyDeletePeace, Love and Chocolate,
Tiffany
Keyword in the post that I feel set things up to go wrong. Text! Not enough actual verbal communication to really get a feel for each other.
ReplyDeleteAt 40 something trying to get back on the dating scene, I had an instant where I was trying to get to know another 40 something and I didn't think 'Text' messaging would get in the way of getting to know the person. All she wanted to do was text, after being flooded with text after text and not getting a feel for her. I called and simply said if we're to get to know each other. Less text, more actual conversation needs to be our focus. Maybe it didn't come across that way, because her attitude and desire to ask immediately after going out, "when can we hang out again?"... to, I think you're cool but let's just be friends..
HUH?
All because I said slow your roll with all these text messages? LMBO!
Hmm, well you know ALL about my dating woo's! But I kind of get what she is saying. First there was a miscommunication. I think she took their texting etc as getting to know each other and leading into a possible date. He saw it as chatting.
ReplyDeleteThe first time you go out with a man you shouldn't go to his house. And I'm sure that's how she saw it. Meanwhile he asked her to come thru and chill amongst friends and not alone. Dudes play so many dumb azz games that she probably thought he just wanted the buns and if she went it would be just the two of them. COMMUNICATION was jacked! She flicked the eff off because she thought one thing but he probably wasn't as clear as he could have been. I get both sides!
Like yourself I'd always believed the game is the game and everything under the Sun has already been done. But after seeing what takes place in this day and time I am not so sure.
ReplyDeletePeople seem to feel they are entitled, nowadays. Which is fine and dandy, but if they realized they're not, it would rid society of moments like you posted.
Will that ever happen?
I doubt it, fam. At least we can blog about it though.
The game has changed, but so much miscommunication goes on due to all of this technology !I do not text with people I do not already have an established friendship/relationship with, unless it's directions, or to say I am on my way, etc. Dating and/or getting to know a man would have to involve talking on the phone & meeting in person. I also would prefer not to hang out in groups of people I don't know, with a guy that I am attempting to date. This just comes with lots of experience & not wanting people in my business until it matters. But all of this could me communicated in reasonable conversation, if you take the time. Also, many women do not feel comfortable going to a man's home or having him in her home until they have become better acquainted. I could tell some stalker stories, but I won't LOL !
ReplyDelete@ everybody
ReplyDeleteI think what we see here is a MAJOR breakdown in communication. I think at some point in time...we all have to pick up the phone and talk.
Ditto what Kyle said.
ReplyDeleteDating is bullshit right now. There. I said it. *shrug*
ReplyDeleteThere is no right or wrong here, but if this was strictly "textual relations," then he had no plans to get to know her anyway. Guys who text only want sex. So, that was perhaps her way of saying that.
I will say tho, that chick seems unstable. Unless it was a situation where one or both of them expressed interest, she overstepped.
Dating is a headache and as of late seems to be more trouble than what it's worth. That's why I quit. I have bigger fish to fry right now.
Like you said, At some point we should pick up a phone and actually Talk!...A revolutionary idea!
ReplyDeleteLMAO!!
ReplyDeleteI don't see a problem with it, the best interaction when getting to know someone is hanging with them. Learning who they hang with is great too.
I mean its not like you said, "lets f*uk".
Idk..maybe I'm a different breed.
How does she know that you wouldn't take her out another time. Idk...sorry to here..lol.
Cool blog, Kyle. I'm Deanna's brother; Edoka's mate.
ReplyDeleteKerm