I think it might be that time...
Time to have that talk...
Time to talk about the birds and the bees...
Or is it too early?
All of you who know me and those of you know who me through this medium, you know that there is nothing that I enjoy more that being a father. Being a father is the most rewarding and challenging jobs that I'll ever have. It's the most important job that I'll ever have. I'll always be a father to my 3 sons. My oldest son, Deion, is 10 yrs old. He's a very unassuming kid. He's very outgoing, the kinda kid that everybody likes, very smart, very perceptive, very witty... (a chip off da ole block). He's not far from puberty. He's at the stage of his life where he doesn't say "ewww" when you talk to him about girls. He doesn't have a girlfriend yet and I think he's a few yrs away from that.
I think at some point in time this year...he and I will discuss the birds and the bees. I will talk to him about sex.
At the age of 10 or 11...is it too early to talk to him about sex? I don't think so. I was having this discussion with a close friend of mine the other day. She told me that she has already talked to her daughter about sex and she's 10. She also told me that she is STILL waiting on her parents to talk to her about sex. LOL. That was a conversation that never happened. Well, it won't go down like that in my house. It's up to me to talk to Deion, Kameron, and Brandon about this. It's not something that I can expect my wife to talk to them about. No...this a conversation that must go down between us. The men.
I will tell Deion many of the same things that my Dad told me. Besides the act of sex, "you treat a woman like you would want a man to treat your sister, cousin, or mother." He also said not to "sleep with just any chick...make sure that she's special." I would like for him to wait until he's mentally and emotionally ready. Sex changes things. We, as grown ups, can have a hard time dealing with sex! It's even more complicated when you're younger. I'll talk about and show him how to put on a condom. And I will make sure that I answer any questions.
I want to make sure that he knows that he can talk to me about sex. He's not gonna talk to my wife about it. I want to may sure that I leave that door open so that he knows that I'm here for him. I don't want him to find out about sex in the streets or on the Internet.
What do you remember about your conversation about the birds and the bees?
How have (will) you handle it with your child?
Hollatchaboi
Never had a conversation about sex with my Mom. It wasnt gonna be a conversation with my Dad of course and my Mom forget it.
ReplyDeleteMy Mom and I were light years apart in age so it was a big gap generation wise. My mom had me when she was 42 and Im 42 right now. My friends used to think my parents were my Grandparents.
Anyway I learned about sex in health class and from "hands on" experience.
PLEASE HAVE THE TALK WITH YOUR BOYS, WE ABSOLUTELY NEED RESPONSIBLE YOUNG MEN TO KNOW WHAT THEIR DOING WHEN THEY'RE GETTIN DOWN WITH MY NEICES !! (I dont have children)
I will never forget it... I was in the 5th grade (11 years old) when my mother's boyfriend had "the talk" with me. The start of my menstrual cycle sparked that conversation. I knew my mother wasn't going to have it with me because sex embarrassed her.
ReplyDeleteIt is important that this conversation be had with your sons prior to their hormones going into overdrive. Looking back on it now, I wish that sex hadn't embarrassed my mother to the point where she couldn't have offered her insight in that conversation. I think knowing that I could go to both mommy and "daddy" would have been fundamental to me.
I don't think my mother ever talked to me about sex. We talked (very briefly) about how a girl's body changes during puberty but that was it. Even that was sparked after the infamous "sex ed class in sixth grade" and by then a few kids were already having sex.
ReplyDeleteWOW! That is really sad now that I think about it.
The sex talks are easy with my 12 yo boy and they started a couple of years ago. I say their easy because I just tell the honest truth with each. and. every. question he has. The first question he ever asked me was does Mountain Dew make your wee wee bigger. I knew this was gonna be fun. The most recent question he asked me was "Where does the rest of the sperm go? Like the ones left over from the one that actually fertilizes the egg." Whoa, hold your horses there buddy, but I cracked up laughing after the initial shock of such a question wore off. He was disgusted to learn that most women don't mind if it runs down their leg. Yeah, he knows about condoms, but he WANTED to know about making babies.
ReplyDeleteMy mom never had the sex talk with me, but I definitely talk to my daughter every chance I get. She turned 12, but started developing around 11 and I made sure to start talking to her right away.
ReplyDeleteI do not think your son is too young to have the talk, he is at the right age and I'm sure that he has a few questions that he may be afraid to bring up. So, definitely have the talk with your son!!
Both my parents talked to me about sex.
ReplyDeleteFrom Dad "Keep your legs closed"
From Mom "Let me know when you start having sex"
Me in my mind Yeah right, it took her 4 months to realize that I started my cycle.
That was all they said to me!!!
It took me longer to type what they said than it took for them to say it.
I spoke to both my daughters in detail, body parts, hygiene, love, lust, birth control and how to avoid being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person.
Giving your child guidance and accurate information is crucial. It should not be left to the internet, by chance or misinformation.
www.deliveringonthepromise.com/rcvmoore
I can't wait to be a father someday, it's gonna be great. Thanks for sharing this, I love your blog!
ReplyDeleteI got my sex ed from Health class.. and pops told me to keep my joint in my pants. he didn't seem to mean it though. That was about it. Don't have kids yet, so I have time to think about it, but I know I want to do better than I got, even though I think I turned out aiight.
ReplyDeleteBy the time my mum was ready to talk to me about sex the school had already shown us the movie and I knew all there was to know. Well I knew that I wasnt ever going to do it! My how things changed when I got older lol
ReplyDeleteDid I mention you are an amazing daddy!
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